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A letter to Joan December 8, 2009

Posted by Ruth in Black and White Evidence of Joan Wheeler's Lies: Letters, Court Documents.
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While I’m shopping around for perhaps a new site for my blog, here is a letter I sent to Joan back in December 2004. It’s pretty self-explanatory. And explains HOW Joan and I got to fighting, what started everything, her theft of my money back in 1990, and her refusal to admit that she stole from me. By the way, when she reneged on her promise to give me the lawyer’s refund, I said goodbye to her and hung up on her (we were on the phone). This was December 1990. Her response? She sent me a nasty letter, the first of many nasty letters, some full of lies, some engineered to create problems in my life, some sent to my mother in law’s house, some sent in an envelope that was addressed to me (in her handwriting), but containing a father’s day card she engineered and used her own 10 year old son. Another envelope simply addressed to Ruth (in her handwriting) and contained a small letter from her son to my fiance, another letter whose handprinting on the envelope matched that from her son’s letter. So she used her own child in our feud. Another letter addressed to me and my fiance, but inside a letter addressed to me and my oldest sister, about a chance meeting between Joan’s ex-husband and a man I never met. Another letter addressed to me and my fiance, but the letter was addressed to me, and it told me that my fiance got the next door neighbor pregnant. Another letter, again in another person’s handwriting and a return address of a “friend” that Joan was feuding with, was addressed to me and sent on the 25 th anniversary of our reunion, and in it she wonders why I don’t like her. And tells a lie that her son saw me driving past her house. When I didn’t even have a car.  She’s been a busy lady. Not to mention letters she wrote to the mayor of Buffalo and my job, and calling my job to get me fired. Anyway, enough of the synopsis of Joan’s sins.

So in getting back to this letter I sent her in December 2004. What was her response to this letter, wherein I am begging for help? SHE TRIED TO PULL ME INTO COURT FOR HARASSMENT! -But the court denied her petition. They could see that I was NOT harassing her, but asking for help, asking for justice. If someone feels they are publicly humiliated by the publication of this letter here on this blog, well they should be humiliated, they should be ashamed for what they did: to her own sister. Not only the theft, not only the disrespect to her sister, but her putting into motion a feud that is continuing to this day. Except I am NOT feuding. I am only doing what she is doing: putting the story of  the feud on a blog. Except for one thing: I AM PUTTING OUT THE TRUTH! And I am backing my blog up with scans of documents and evidence that proves that I AM TELLING THE TRUTH!

Dec. 26, 2004


First understand that this is not a letter to cause trouble. John and I are in a jam. First let me explain something. We bought our house off our landlord in 1996. Six months later, John got laid off. So right off the bat – we were always one step behind in paying our taxes. Ours is a private mortgage – not thru the banks – so our taxes, insurance and water bills are not included in the monthly mortgage payment. We had a 10 year mortgage and will be finished in April 2006. We have only 15 months to go.

The problem is – and you may be aware – that the City of Buffalo needs money. They need to cover the 66 million dollars given to the Bass Pro shop at the old Memorial Auditorium. This will be done on the backs of us working poor. The City has taken a hard stand – they have decided that any taxes or fees, more than 1 year old MUST be paid by Dec 31, 2004 or they will foreclose the property. They did not give anybody any warning. The notices were sent out Dec 1. They are threatening to take my house! The City wants 50% and the rest in 6 equal monthly payments.

As you know, John had heart surgery last September. In November 2000, I had a hysterectomy and was out of work for 2 months. Because of these and other illnesses, we fell behind in the garbage user fee. John got laid off August 31, 2004. He found a job and started working Nov 1, but it is only part time, 25-30 hours, minimum wage.

Now what I am asking you is for the money that is owed me from 1990 – the total is $383.50. I understand this is a lot – perhaps you can give it to me in monthly payments. I have enclosed the breakdown of the funds – and what was paid back.

I know some of the money was used by Colby – and you may be thinking that should I go after him- fair enough. However, you both benefited from my money. You took some of the money WITHOUT MY PERMISSION, reneged on your promise to give me your share of Mr. Campo’s returned fee, promised MANY TIMES to repay me, and back on your word, time and time again. You never once acknowledged that what you did was wrong. Colby did, but never you.

Joyce tried to get you to see what you did was wrong, but you wouldn’t listen. You dipped into my money to fix your car – and this wasn’t even my money – I had borrowed from the bank! When the time came to return the money to me, I didn’t have all the money to repay the bank, and I was put into debt. And then MY car broke. I did not have the cash to fix it, my cash was going to repay the bank loan. But there was not enough credit left over to fix my car. I couldn’t even charge the repairs because my credit limit was used up. You then agreed to give me your share of Mr. Campo’s returned fee. I was counting on that money. I was planning on fixing my car with that money. John and I were taking the bus in the cold, but we knew that you would give us the money. But then you called me in Dec 1990 and left a message on my machine that you changed your mind. You got your car fixed with Ruth’s money (credit), but when it came time to get Ruth’s car fixed – oh well, too bad! And you couldn’t or wouldn’t understand why I was angry. Or else you just didn’t care! You were driving a warm car, while John and I were freezing waiting for a bus. And you wonder why I was angry.

Anyway – You have been busy the past couple of years saying that you want the family to “heal.” Acknowledging what you did can start the healing process. And paying me back the money what you and your ex-husband took from me would be even better. You left a message on my answering machine early in 1991, saying that “money shouldn’t come between sisters.” It wasn’t the money that came between us, it was the idea that you took the money for your own needs with no regard as to me or my needs. It was this disrespect that came between us. You disrespected me when you took the money. When people say platitudes like “money shouldn’t come between people,” they are usually the ones who want to dictate to others on what to do with their money. I mean: It’s easy to look at someone who earns more money and say what they should do with it.

I work at B G to support myself. I work there for my bills, for my wants, my needs. I did not get a job there to fix your car. Your is your responsibility, not mine. And for you to assume that it my responsibility just because I made more money than your husband was wrong. Than you compounded the problem by taking the money without asking, (stealing) and then compounded it further by continuously going back on your word to pay me back. OK, maybe you didn’t have the money to pay me. Maybe you don’t have the money now. Maybe all you can give me $100.00, or $50.00, even 10 or 20 will help.

Now is the time for you to put your money where your mouth is. You are always talking about healing the family. Helping someone out would be a start. And John and I really need the help right now.

I tried to ask you for help once before, in June 1994. My electricity was cut off. Yes, you and Colby were not the only ones having money problems. I called you, crying, I said “Joan I need help.” The phone was disconnected. I thought we were cut off. I called again. “Joan, I..” CLICK I called again. “Joan.” click. You kept hanging up on me. I gave up and called the electric company and made arrangements. But then I called you a couple more times, and each time I called, you hung up on me. Just before I left the house to borrow money to pay the electric bill (I borrowed from 3 different neighbors), I called and swore at you. Do you remember this day? It was the day you had the trap on the line and then you reported to the police that I called you several times and hung up on you! My own sister, made a false report to the police on me. I called you for help. I was crying, but you were setting me up and betraying me.

Well, if you don’t help me now, I will not call you up and swear at you. You may not be able to help me. You may be able to help me and will leave me to hang out in the wind, as you did before. I’ll have no way of knowing the truth. Only you can answer that. Only you can answer to your theft.

John and I went out today and brought in buckets of snow. We have 2 huge plastic tubs in the basement, filled with snow. When it melts, we’ll have water to bring up to flush the toilet. This way, we can keep the water bill down a bit until we catch up with other bills. We have the 50% down payment for the garbage user fee, but we will still be strapped for the next 6 months.

When you respond to this letter, please keep it to this topic. I don’t want to hear about anything else. I am not in the mood for any more bickering. I have way too many things on my mind to engage in another war. If you can help me, that will be wonderful. If not, well ok. Ruth

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