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Love and Open Communication are not just words, they should be LIVED! December 12, 2009

Posted by Ruth in Joan Wheeler's abuse and harassment of her birth family.
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So the Teflon Dictator has written yet another essay on her blog on how people should live.
with cute little platitudes like “Step families can and do flourish with love and open communication and laughter.”
and “adding new biological kin…in no way destroys adopted family kinship.”
I can’t argue with that. These are very nice statements. I just wish Teflon Dictator would have applied these thoughts to her relationships with her birth sisters.
Love and open communication.

MMM, was there LOVE there Joan, when you stole the beads off my mother’s (and mine) wedding dress in 1983?

Was there LOVE there when you stole that money from me in 1990?

Was there OPEN COMMUNICATION when you needed money to fix the brakes on your car? Did you CALL ME ON THE PHONE AND ASK IF YOU COULD TAKE SOME OF THE MONEY SET ASIDE TO BUY AN APARTMENT BUILDING? NO, you did not. And you waited a full month to tell me, on the day we went to get the remaining money from the bank.
LOVE AND OPEN COMMUNICATION? I didn’t see either one of those when you encouraged my fiance to LIE to me behind my back.
LOVE? Was there love there when you encouraged him to leave me?

Was there LOVE when you involved my mother-in-law in our feud?
Was there LOVE AND OPEN COMMUNICATION when you called child abuse on yourself, posing as me, and reporting my fiance as molesting your daughter?
Was there LOVE when you either wrote a letter disguising your handwriting, signing it as your 10 year old son, or you told your son to write it, a letter meant for my fiance, but the envelope was addressed to me?
Was there LOVE when you called my job repeatedly trying to get me fired over something I didn’t do and after they told you I didn’t do it?
Was there LOVE there when you sent me a letter using your friend’s return address without her knowledge or permission?
Was there LOVE there when that letter told a lie: that my fiance got the next door lady pregnant?
Was there LOVE there when you called immigration to have our sister deported from the country she choose as her home?
Was there LOVE there when you refused to ship over her belongings that you had in your possession, and decided to keep them?
Was there LOVE there when you kept the money for yourself that she sent to you to cover the shipping charges?
Was there LOVE there when you meddled and interfered with our oldest sister’s family matters when her daughter wanted to run away from home? I told my niece to sit tight. Keep going to her counseling sessions. And when she was 16, if she felt that she absolutely needed to leave home, to discuss it with her counselor and ask to be emancipated. I TOLD you, NO STRANGERS to be brought into the family situation. But NO, Miss Know-it-all Joan, just HAD to talk to her boss, who called in child abuse and the whole thing blew up and my neice got stuck in a foster home.
Was there LOVE there when you made that phony child abuse call on yourself, you told people that I was not granted custody of my niece in 1982 because I was found “unfit.” WRONG! I was denied custody because the judge in Broome County felt that my brother-in-law was too antagonistic and the judge felt that my niece should be placed in a foster home that was considered “neutral territory.”
Was there LOVE there when you engineered that letter from either your son or you, to have me call you, and you set me up with the police?
Was there LOVE there when after you were granted a simple 6 month order of protection and the judge said that if everything went well it would be dismissed, and it was, but YOU go around telling people I was placed on probation (A LIE) and that I have a criminal record (another LIE)?

Gee Joan, you sure showed a lot of love now didn’t you?

Teflon Dictator Joan Wheeler goes on to talk about “…relatives (that) have not caused pain, and have not been involved in spreading rumors.”

JOAN: what pain have you caused ME? What rumors have you spread about ME?
Joan, the PAIN you caused me when you pulled me falsely into court. The PAIN you caused me when you stole from me. The PAIN you caused me when you tried to break me and John up. The PAIN you caused me when you verbally and emotionally abused me on November 3, 2009 when all I did was call you to tell you your godmother died. The RUMORS THAT YOU HAVE SPREAD ABOUT ME: that I have a criminal record, that I was placed on probation, that I called child abuse on you. The RUMORS that you have spread all over the internet since November 3, 2009, saying that your sisterS (plural) are interfering with your life. Why plural when it was only ME who called?
The PAIN and embarrassment I have had to endure just because I got the sad happenstance of being related to a hypocritical LIAR AND THIEF such as you! So now go and shove your stupid idiotic platitudes about LOVE AND OPEN COMMUNICATION up where the sun don’t shine.

additional comment here from Gert 3 Oct 2012.…at the time this post was posted, I was in the process of moving and didn’t have much opportunity to know the full story of the recently published lying book of Joan’s. Actually today is the first I’m seeing of this post and as co-admin with Ruth, I have the ability, now, to edit and add comments. This is a very good post, it shows just how raw our initial reactions were to finding out what Joan said. We have a lot to say and we will continue to say them UNTIL Joan removes all those hate-blogs against us.



1. chayelet - December 12, 2009

My sentiments exactly-well said, Ruth.

2. chayelet - December 12, 2009

I’ve just had a thought-is this why Ms Wheeler doesn’t want The Three Sippel Sisters in her life and is so angry with us for persisting in reminding her that we do exist- it is not that WE have betrayed HER- it is clear that, all along, SHE was betraying US. And still betraying us.

Is the reason that we are not welcome in Ms Wheeler’s life the fact that she has a guilty conscience?

Is Ms Wheeler FINALLY realising, after all, that we have seen right through her fawning and pretence all along? I wonder.

With these thoughts, I think, it is time for me to bid a fond farewell to my readers, as I think, no, I KNOW I have made my point, but, just in case Ms Wheeler still does not get it-I, and my friends here in England, have seen right through the fawning-we’ve seen you for what you are, because you showed us, and we are far more intelligent than you give us credit for. I have nothing more to say on this episode in my family’s history-it is exactly that, history, from my point of view. If Ms Wheeler wants to think that I have in the past and am now conspiring against her, there is nothing more I can say or do to rectify that. If Ms Wheeler is still hurting over her adoption-it is my belief that she has the power to heal herself and it is a pity she chooses not to take responsibility for her own happiness. I have known many adoptees in my life, but not one who has had such a long self-pity party as this.

Lest readers think the Sippel Sisters are such monsters, I’m sure my two sisters join me in congratulating Ms Wheeler on the achievement of publishing her book-it is no mean feat.

However, it is clear to me, that my sister Ruth has suffered the most through the years at the hands of Ms Wheeler, and I support Ruth in her quest to get the truth out. I have reconciled myself with my past and am content with what I have achieved with my life. I am also looking forward to the rest of my life, however long that may be, and to achieving whatever else I am meant to achieve along the way.


3. Ruth - December 12, 2009

Very well put Chayelet.
Yes, it is indeed Ms. Wheeler, who is definitely hurting. She is suffering from PTSD. Post Traumatic Stress Disorder. AND she is also suffering from a bad conscience. She WILL NOT come forth and debate the issues. She will not accept my challenges: to produce her evidence of the charges she keeps putting out: her so-called orders of protections she has against her sisters.
Other than that, she will not name SPECIFIC events in which her birth sisters have wronged her, except the phony child abuse call. She keeps telling people that we, her sisters are interfering with her life, but she refuses to say HOW we are doing so. And can she produce the evidence? NO, she cannot, because THERE IS NO EVIDENCE.
After reading my blog, instead of being woman enough and TRUTHFUL enough to list my grievances and address them in turn, and give us HER side of the story, she just acts like the little child she is and posts a very unprofessional rant on her blog. sobbing that we have destroyed her reputation.
Well, Joan, YOU have the chance to redeem yourself. Answer the charges I have put to you. Explain to the world why you have done all the things I have listed here in this post. And don’t try to weasel out of it. I have a boxful of papers, of evidence, only some of which I have scanned and posted for the world to see. Evidence of YOUR handwriting, Joan. Evidence of the court decrees. I still have the computer printouts of the email exchanges of early 2004, between you, me, and your live-in boyfreind Dennis. These will be posted. Nothing edited out, just some things for privacy sake, but YOUR OWN WORDS THAT YOU EMAILED ME JOAN WILL BE POSTED FOR ALL YOUR ADOPTION REFORM BUDDIES TO SEE.

4. reposting comments from my last post « Refutting the Forbidden Family - December 12, 2009

[…] chayelet – December 12, 2009 […]

5. Adopted Child Syndrome – a way out for 50 year old brats? « Refuting a Book of Lies: Forbidden Family - March 4, 2010

[…] Love and Open Communication are not just words, they should be LIVED!  December 12, 2009 […]

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