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Joan Wheeler is strangely quiet after we get her “press release” yanked. June 28, 2010

Posted by Ruth in Announcements and updates, Joan Wheeler Speak - how Joan views the world, Joan Wheeler's abuse and harassment of her birth family.
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This is very wierd. In the past, when Joan has falsely accused me and my sisters of shutting down her blog(s) and shutting HER up (oh how I wish we had THAT power), she has been very vocal about it. But the ONE time we DID get her lies yanked off the internet, she has nothing to say!!!!

In the post titled “Joan Wheeler issues press release for her “new” book – no, it’s still the stupid book of idiotic lies, and even her press release is bull”  posted on June 22, 2010, are the statements that we Three Sippel Sisters wrote to the website that hosted the “press release” for her “new” book. The book Forbidden Family came out late November 2009. It is now 7 months later. This book is not new. This website is merely another vanity website, a place where Joan can “publicize” her lying book, trying to drum up business. I really could care less, EXCEPT in her press release, was yet ANOTHER slam against her birth family. She claimed that her birth family “terrorized her to the brink of suicide.” THIS IS SLANDER AND LIBEL! If Joan was at the brink of suicide, it’s because she needs professional help, or else she threatens suicide for attention. And she did it in the past – to me, in my apartment in 1986. Because her then husband Colby moved to South Carolina for a better life and gave her an ultimatum – move to South Carolina (where she would have to leave her new-found birth family in Buffalo) or get a divorce. She came to my apartment and was whining about it, and actually threatened suicide. I don’t remember her exact words, but I could tell it was just for attention – it was all dramatics. Joan should have gotten a career as an actress!

Well, I fired off a separate complaint to the website stating that Joan’s lying statements about her birth family driving her to suicide was slander and libel and even told them about that suicide “threat” in 1986.

We Three Sippel Sisters are taking credit where credit is due: we fired off our complaints to the website, and they yanked Joan’s bullshit press release off the internet.

So why does Joan need to issue a press release months after her lying book has been published? Because it is not selling! I could have told Joan a long time ago, that her book was NOT going to sell. Why? Because it is NOT a true book about adoption reform, it is merely Joan’s “payback” to everyone in her life that ever disagreed with her or made her angry. The book is not about her adoption or her reunion. If it was, it wouldn’t have stuff in there about MY life, like I was a neighborhood activist in the 1990’s. What does that have to do with HER adoption that took place in 1956 or her reunion with her birth family that took place in 1974? I will tell you what it has to do with even adoption reform: ABSOLUTELY NOTHING. So why is it in her book? It is just a bit of tawdry gossip about me, that is all. Because I live in the “inner city” where conditions are less than perfect, so she paints me as white trash. And yes, conditions in my neighborhood weren’t all that great, but they have greatly improved. Why? BECAUSE I AM A NEIGHBORHOOD ACTIVIST! I organized and headed a block club on my street. I had discussions with the police chief of Buffalo, the mayor, my district councilman, and others. Joan holds me up to ridicule in her book just because I was/am a neighborhood activist. What kind of person puts down another person for their efforts in trying to improve the quality of life in their hometown, for fighting drug activities, for taking a stand against guns and violence in our streets? I will tell you what kind of person does that: a screwed up nutball like Joan Wheeler, who is so full of hate towards me that she talks about me like I was slime. Yet whines and complains if somebody “talks” about her!  She wants it both ways! JOAN will put down other people, but gets mad if they put her down. Typical narcissistic bitchy behavior.

If I am white trash because I live in the “inner city,” well so is Joan, because she lived only a mile and a half from me – also in the inner city. When she puts people down for living in the inner city, she puts herself down. It is called “transference.” There are things about HER life, HER personality, that she can’t stand, and instead having the guts to be a WOMAN and changing what she doesn’t like in her life, she will transfer the putdowns onto other people and put them down. And her favorite scapegoat is ME, and from time to time my other sisters. Gosh, I just had a thought – if I were to have a heart attack and die tomorrow – Joan’s whole reason for living (blaming me for everything that is wrong in her life) – will be gone! Maybe she will up and commit suicide. Oh my! I better be sure to take my Lipitor and my Omega 3 fish oil capsules to keep my heart healthy. I don’t want to get blamed, even posthumously, for Joan’s suicide! roflmao1 and believe you me, Joan would blame me – she would leave a suicide note – it would read: “My birthsister Ruth died of a heart attack last month. Things are going awful in my life. My book isn’t selling. The readership on my blog is down. In fact just last week, another post of mine got shut down by her. Yes, I know she died, but I just KNOW she is responsible. I don’t know who else to blame for my own screwups, Ruth is gone. What am I going do? I can’t blame anybody else. So I will just end it all.”

roflmao! – just another example of Joan Wheeler Speak!


Help or interference? According to Joan Wheeler, you should NEVER help, because that eliminates self-determination. so let them starve, lay injured, but do NOT help. June 25, 2010

Posted by Ruth in Joan Wheeler Speak - how Joan views the world.
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from Gert McQueen, June 25, 2010

This morning, on our errands, D. and I saw a small turtle, about a man’s hand size, in the middle of the road. D. being the kind of guy he is, goes back, pulls off the road, gets out and rescues the turtle by carrying him across the road and puts him in the ditch. Before doing so D showed me the turtle and said he was not a snapping turtle but a box turtle. I don’t know the particulars of turtles so I have to assume he is correct. So we continue on our way. Then D said, out of the blue, I don’t remember which way the turtle was going, maybe I confused him, turned him around and he’s probably saying something like he has to back that way all over again. Then I said, oh dear what would Joan make out of this….and…I began to think like Joan.

If Joan heard about it she would say:

Upon seeing the turtle you should have known what kind it was, identity is important. You stole it’s identity. Never mind that you can not read the turtle’s mind, you should have known, you were superior to it and it is your responsibility. You should have made note of the direction it was going, direction in life is important. You neglected the direction in life of the turtle, you made decisions for the turtle without asking his opinion and wishes, doesn’t matter that you are human and he is turtle. You didn’t ask its permission for changing his life direction and so, you are guilt of traumatizing the turtle, by interferring with it’s direction in life, turning it around, and by touching it. The abuse of it all! The shock and awe that the turtle went through! He will never be right again.

That turtle was on its way to a very important conference of turtles, where he would have been able to be with ‘those that speak his language’ where he could be ‘his true turtle self’. That turtle was on his life journey but D and G deliberately picked him up, discussed his size, shape, type of species he was, looked inside his shell where he was hiding in terror because they had him up in the air turning him around and around, making him dizzy and confused. Then they just put him down on some grass filled ditch, never asking the turtle which direction he was going in the first place. They kept the direction secret from him! They told others about him, they told secrets about the turtle to other turtles. They mocked the turtle and whispered behind his back. The turtle was full of hate, raging hate for those that kept him from going on his life journey in the direction he wanted to go. Other stood in his way! They raced past him in fast moving cars, not caring that he was slower than them. He was fearful of crossing the road. And then a couple of insentitive brutes come along, picked him up and traumatized him. He laid in that ditch on the brink of suicide! Then he decided, hey I’ll show them, I’ll write a book and educate these ignorant people who rescue turtles on country roads of the trauma they caused. Maybe I can get a press release on the story! Who could I get to play my part in a movie deal? Any takers from Y&R?

And so it goes!

Joan Wheeler issues press release for her “new” book – no, it’s still the stupid book of idiotic lies, and even her press release is bull. June 22, 2010

Posted by Ruth in Joan Wheeler's abuse and harassment of her birth family, Lies in the book Forbidden Family, Refuting Joan Wheelers statements.
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Joan has the nerve to say that she was terrorized by her birth family to the brink of suicide. what a bunch of baloney! Here is Gert’s statement to the website that is posting Joan’s lying press release:

I, Gert McQueen, am birth sibling, say that the content of this book is full of lies, misrepresentations, fabrications, exaggerations, personal fantasies and details the author’s personal subjective mindset along with her decline into mental ill and madness. This book is not a true help to anyone who is serious about adoption reform.
The author did not get either written or verbal permission from those in the picture on the back cover which depicts our parents and siblings with the author in the womb. The use of which is for the purpose to earn monies from it. 
I am Ruth Sippel, birth sister, the author’s statement that “her birth family terrorized her to the brink of suicide” is slanderous and libelous. Joan’s birth family has never terrorized her. 
I am Katherine Inglis, birth sister.  I wish to state that I find its depiction of my childhood (which the author never witnessed) and my family.  It’s depiction of me, as an adult living apart from the family in a foreign country for the whole of the author’s reunion, is nothing short of  caricature.
This ‘press statement’ is highly misleading and uses sensationalist language which reflects negatively on my and my family’s private lives, of which is not at all relevant to her chosen subject.
We have a web-blog refuting the entire book and welcome any and all to look at it and make up your mind as to the truth of the matter.  ruthsippelpace.wordpress.com

And this is my statement to Joan’s press release:

I am one of the birth sisters of Joan Wheeler. I object to her statement contained in her “press release” of her book Forbidden Family that she was terrorized to the brink of suicide by her birth family. This is slander and libel.
Her suicide threat was in 1986, made to me, about her then husband who was living in another state. He gave her an ultimatitum: either leave NY and her new found birth family or get a divorce. Also she “missed him.”
Joan also states inher book that I have a criminal record, and this is absolutely false.
This is one example of total falsehoods in this book.

The website would not accept more than 2000 characters, so here is the original message we wanted to get out:

As one of the birth siblings of the author I, Gert McQueen, speaking for myself and two other siblings, must say that the content of this book is full of lies, misrepresentations, fabrications, exaggerations, personal fantasies and details the author’s personal subjective mindset along with her decline into mental ill and madness. This book is just a vanity piece of the author’s and not a true help to anyone who is serious about adoption reform.
The author did not get either written or verbal permission from those in the picture on the back cover which depicts our parents and siblings with the author in the womb. It is a personal family picture and each of us is highly offended that it has been placed on this book of fiction and lies for the sole purpose to earn monies from it.  
The author was placed in a private legal adoption upon the death of one parent. Her adoptive parents had fostered hatred within her from day one and the author had lived a life of mental illness, her own and the adoptive mother’s. The author has caused untold damages to members of her birth and adoptive families for over more than 30 years. Once we three birth sisters had seen the publication of this book of lies, in which she details her decline into mental illness and how she maintains, through out the book, that we have harassed her over the years, we had to make a stand against the book.
  I am Ruth Sippel, birth sister of Joan Wheeler, and am hereby giving notice that Joan Wheeler’s statement that “her birth family terrorized her to the brink of suicide” is slanderous and libelous. Joan’s birth family has never terrorized her, it was Joan who has harassed us and other people, going so far as to file false police reports and false child abuse reports on us, and calling my place of employment multiple times in an attempt to have my employment terminated.  As to her suicide attempt (or threat for attention), it was in 1986, in MY apartment, to me, when her husband had moved out of New York State and it was the husband who gave her the ultimatum to either move to South Carolina with him and leave her newly found birth family or get a divorce.

I am Katherine Inglis, birth sister of Joan Wheeler, author of the book ‘Forbidden Family’. I own a copy of this book, have read it in detail. I wish to state that I find it a book full of half-truths and out-and-out lies in its depiction of my childhood (which the author never witnessed) and my family. This book is poorly researched and very poorly written. It’s depiction of me, as an adult living apart from the family in a foreign country for the whole of the author’s reunion, is nothing short of  caricature.
I am particulary incensed by Ms Wheeler’s unauthorised use of a private family photograph to illustrate the back cover of this book. Ms Wheeler never obtained my permission, verbally or in writing, to use my image to publicise her book.
Ms Wheeler’s ‘press statements’ are highly misleading and use sensationalist language which reflects negatively on my and my family’s private lives. Indeed, the book is littered throughout with Ms Wheeler’s versions of the truth-unsubstantiated family ‘legends’, and urban myths, which only reinforce her own reputation as the family tittle-tale, and is the real reason behind our mis-trust of her, which she perceives as our harassment of her – none of which is at all relevant to her chosen subject.
This book purports to be about adoption reform – but, it is in fact, anything but.

We respectfully ask that you remove this press release of this “new” book, which has been in print now for 7 months, so it is hardly “new.” We have a web-blog refuting the entire book and welcome any and all to look at it and make up your mind as to the truth of the matter. The blog currently does not contain all comments relating to the book, as it is a rather large wordy incoherent account of the author’s madness, but in due time we shall address every page of this insulting untrue account of our family. 


New harassment of Joan Wheeler to her birth family June 22, 2010

Posted by Ruth in Joan Wheeler's abuse and harassment of her birth family.
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Joan Wheeler has now published a family portrait of her birth family on her website. She does NOT have permission to publish this picture in any shape or form. The picture includes my mother, my father, myself and my two sisters, and my brother. Of the six persons in the photo, two are deceased. My mother and my brother. My father is very much alive, and so am I, and so are my two sisters, Gert and Kathy. Joan Wheeler has NOT obtained permission from any of us, either inwriting or verbally, to use this photo on her book or on her blog. It is not even HER photo, as she is not even in it. My mother may have been pregnant with Joan when the photo was taken, but that means nothing.

Joan, you have broken the law. We are coming after you. And even if we can’t get justice thru the courts, this blog is showing the world what a f’ing snake you are. Yeah, go ahead, keep whining about The Three Sippel Sisters are harassing you – just what are YOU doing to us? Like I said, the whole world is now finding out about you. We have an ace up our sleeve little girl. We have a surprise guest star, no, not a relative, either birth or adopted to you – but someone who, when we are ready for it, will blow you out of the game once and for all. If I were you Joan, I’d get a new prescription for Valium, ‘cos you’re going to need it. – oh and yes, just like I said the other day – I have another surprise for you – another guest star – who’s email to me proves very enlightening, and will blow one of your f’ing lies up in your lying face.

lol never mind the Valium, better get some Atavan or Haldol, you will need some major tranquilizing.  wheee! 4 point restraints coming up!

From: ruthbpacemail.com

To: legal@startlogic.com;  cc:  gertmcqueen, kinglis,karenfinken  ruthbpacecom (email addresses edited out for THIS posting – ruth)

Subject: Unauthorized use of my picture on a website that you are hosting – my lawyer is being contacted

Date: Tue, 22 Jun 2010 00:28:38 -0400

Dear Sirs,

I wish to lodge a complaint against Joan Wheeler, who has her website with you at http://forbiddenfamily.com

Ms. Wheeler has posted a family portrait of my parents, me, and my siblings WITHOUT OUR PERMISSION on her website. I respectfully ask that you contact Ms Wheeler and have my picture removed immediately or further legal action will be taken against her and you. I will be contacting my lawyer if I do not see that picture removed.

I currently have a blog at https://ruthsippelpace.wordpress.com/ entitled “Refuting a Book of Lies: Forbidden Family – – what “author” Joan Wheeler doesn’t want us to do: expose her lies in her book and tell the truth about us and our family”

And my sister, Kathy Inglis, who is also in the family portrait has written the following post:UNAUTHORISED USE OF MY IMAGE ON JOAN WHEELER’S WEBSITE by Kathy Inglis https://ruthsippelpace.wordpress.com/2010/06/21/unauthorised-use-and-publication-of-my-image-on-joan-wheeler-website/  and I will be copying and pasting this letter in it’s entirety on my blog.

It is up to YOU at Startlogic to stop this unauthorized use of MY picture. Thank You.

and this one:

Date: Tue, 22 Jun 2010 02:03:48 -0400
Subject: unauthorised use of my picture on a website you are hosting – image provided here and link for you to see it.
From: ruthsippelpace

To: legal@startlogic.com
CC: kinglis; karenfinken; gertmcqueen;ruthbpace (emails edited out)
Dear Sirs,

Here is the link that the picture and my siblings that has been posted on http:forbiddenfamily.com WITHOUT OUR PERMISSION.
I respectfully request that you remove this picture.
I am the child whose face is the only one, NOT hidden by text. I am being held by my father, who is still alive, and who has NOT given permission to have this personal family portrait published in any shape or form, on a book, in a book, or on the internet.
Neither myself, nor my sisters, Gertrude McQueen, or Kathy Inglis, has given permission to have our picture published. My mother is deceased, as well as my brother, they are both in the picture.
Ruth B. Pace
 1. Gert McQueen – June 22, 2010

It is one thing to post a family picture for the benefit of family members, but it is another thing to use a family picture, without permission, for the pursuit of money. Joan Wheeler is using our family images for her personal gain. This is immoral, indecent, disrepectful of parents and siblings. Joan should cease from further dishonoring our parents. We will continue to answer every vile page of her disgusting book on this blog. She is not a true avocate for adoption reform, her sole purpose in writing the book was and is for personal income. Her book contains repeated attacks upon us three sisters and other members of both birth and adoptive families. She writes only of her personal decline of mental illness into the depths of madness caused by her obsession that she was damaged by being adopted, when in fact, she was damaged by the adopted mother, it is all in the book, which I for one fully intend on exposing, here on this blog.

So go for it, Joan, knock yourself out with trying to have the world see it your way. No, you are a sick puppy and you have dishonored our mother, family, brother and us and the entire family.


 2. RuthJune 22, 2010

and may I add, Joan, now your little adoption buddies are going to see YOU for what YOU are: a disrespectful sick puppy. And they will see US for what WE are – victims of Joan’s continued harassment of us.

But we do not wallow in the victim mentality – we stand up for our rights – and our family’s rights.

ah, The Three Sippel Sisters – linked together as The Three Muskeeteers – “One for all, and all for one.”

and lest we forget our niece – which makes us FOUR!

Athos, Porthos, Aramis and the FOURTH Muskeeter – yes, there were four – was D’Artagnan.

All for justice!


Posted by chayelet in Our Family History, Private, Refuting Joan Wheelers statements, Statements from The Three Sippel Sisters.
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It has come to my attention that Joan Wheeler has published a family photograph which includes my image to publicise her Book of Lies about myself and my family.


1. RuthJune 22, 2010 [Edit]

I hereby give notice that legal action will be taken against Joan Wheeler IMMEDIATELY. I will contacting my lawyer in the morning.

I haven’t forgotten Joan Wheeler or my blog about her filthy lies — June 17, 2010

Posted by Ruth in Announcements and updates.
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I have just been really sick the past couple of weeks.  A viral illness that has been going around – nausea, vomiting, the runs, high fever, dehydration, severe headaches.  And my husband caught it from me.

Now if I was so dam nasty, as Joan likes to tell everyone that I am, I would have gone over to her house and made sure I breathed on her so she would get sick too.  But no, I am NOT as evil as that.  But now watch – since I have let the cat out of the bag – If Joan has been sick, she will find SOME way to pin it on me – after all, I seem to be her favorite scapegoat. Anything that goes wrong in her life is always MY fault – or the collective Three Sippel Sisters.

Don’t know how we got merged together like that – we aren’t a tapeworm you know – But this is how Joan’s mind works – if you can call that “work” – I call it stupidity.  But you know, stupid people are too stupid to hide their stupidity.

So hopefully, I will finish the blog post I started a few weeks ago – I do have a life you know,  I don’t spend every waking moment on my computer, well, not EVERY waking moment, but a lot, but NOT all of my time is devoted Little Miss Joan. 

And I got some great upcoming posts – I got one that will blow Joan’s mind – and yours – when I refute a MAJOR lie.  and this is NOT the one we hinted at (we – Gert and me) last month. This is a doozy – and the proof I have – well you guys better hold onto your seats when you see the proof!

Oh, are you worried Little Miss Joan? You should be – but then go back to what’s written on my sticky post on this blog’s home page – “If you don’t want people to know what you’ve done, you should not have done it.”

and oh yes – my “warning” to everyone who stops by here – WARNING – EXTREME REFUTING OF LIES AND TRUTHTELLING DONE HERE.

Little Miss Joan, you have told lies about me, my sisters, and other members of our family,  and now those lies are coming back to slap you right in your face – better get on some meds because the ugly truth about YOU is coming out.  And you won’t be able to squirm your way out of them either little girl. You wanted to play games? With my life? You wanted to play games with MY personal, professional and political reputation? We have not reached the end of the game yet little girl – we have not reached HOME yet – we got a long way to go – tighten your seatbelt – it gets really bumpy from now on.

Me, I’m cool – right now I’m listening to Beethoven’s Ninth – Second movement – best dam music EVER in the world.  Get a life Joan – isntead of spending over 30 years writing a piece of trash like that lying idiotic book of yours – you should have been getting an education on classical music, learning how to respect people and learning how NOT to lie.

hiding behind other websites to view this blog – it’s either Joan Wheeler or her adoption buddies June 7, 2010

Posted by Ruth in Having Fun with Disfunctionality.
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oh sneaky sneaky.

I have a regular reader that comes here from other websites: tvrizzor, tv spot9, online paralegal degree and online psychology degree, digg.com. I also have a regular reader from their email inbox of hotmail and yahoo mail.

lol. Only DIRTY ROTTEN SNEAKS DO THAT. come on be honest, why are you hiding?

Oh, but in the past Joan accused ME of using multiple IP addresses to view her blog, until I researched it and found out – and informed Joan via this blog – that when your modem is shut off, the number changed AUTOMATICALLY. Of course it is too much to ask of whiny bitch Joan to APOLOGIZE when she has made a mistake. Like falsely accusing me of something yet again.

well, if you like the coward’s way of doing things, if you really feel the need to hide behind another website to view this blog, hey, that’s ok by me. You’re more than welcome to come back any time. See, I don’t view it as cyber-stalking at all.

So, come on in, set a spell. Read all you want. And ya’ll come back now, ya hear?

I keep my coffee hot and have cake for everyone - even in virtual reality.

The Blame Game – Who’s Job is it to Make Joan Wheeler Happy? June 6, 2010

Posted by Ruth in Lessons in Life.
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I was watching the movie “American History X” the other night. – I’ve seen it before. Excellant movie. About the effects of hate.  It’s a violent movie, not an easy movie to watch. But it’s message is powerful.

The movie stars Avery Brooks, who played Benjamin Sisko on Star Trek: Deep Space Nine. Avery has a beautiful deep sexy voice. He’s kinda sexy too.

ahem. Anyways, at one point, Avery’s character is talking to actor Edward Norton’s character about blame and how he used to blame everyone.

“Blame the white man. Blame society. Blame God. I never got any answers because I was asking the wrong question. ”

Edward Norton: “What question?”

Avery: “Has anything you’ve done made your life better?”


And I’m not talking about writing a book that slams everyone in your life. I’m not talking about writing a book that continues the hate and anger. You know dam well 90% of what you say in your book is lies. WHY? Why would you write such lies? For what purpose? To get me angry? Well you succeeded. And you will get paid back in spades, my dear.

As for me “not understanding you”:  I am not here to make YOUR life happy or easy. Nor is anyone else on this whole planet. THAT IS YOUR OWN DAM JOB. You don’t understand ME, nor have you EVER tried to understand me. I never asked you to. All I ever wanted was for you to accept me. Like I accepted you. But oh no, you never did accept me for who or what I am. That is quite clear in all the judgement calls you make about me in your book. Like I like horror movies, or the Arab culture, or live in the inner city, or didn’t have children, or I was a neighborhood activist. Was there anything you ever liked about me? Apparently not, because according to the picture you paint of me in your book, I am a horrible disgusting person. Well, that’s YOUR opinion. I know differently, and so do the people who do love and accept me. YOU don’t matter.

Here’s a lesson I learned a long time ago Joan. You need to learn it too. Better get used to the fact little girl, that there are over 6 billion persons on this planet. And not all of them are going to like you. And when you find out that some of them don’t like you, for whatever reason, then you will just have to BE AN ADULT ABOUT IT and not friggin whine about it. And some of those persons may be related to you – again, QUIT THE WHINING AND ACCEPT IT AND MOVE ON.

make your own sunshine, like everyone else on the planet

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