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Joan Wheeler is strangely silent after she and her boyfriend were found to have desecrated my father’s funeral guest book. January 23, 2011

Posted by Ruth in Joan Wheeler's abuse and harassment of her birth family, mental illness, Uncategorized.
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It’s a week now since Gert and I have posted about the events of the past 2 years that got Joan disowned by my father, and our telling of the desecration of my father’s guest book in the funeral home. I can’t understand Joan’s silence. Usually when it is reported that someone is angry at her (in this case my father), Joan will go off on a rant and blame Ruth. Or Ruth/Gert/Kathy. But what I find very strange is Joan’s lack of indignation at the desecration of HER father’s guest book at his funeral. I mean, that was HER father, wasn’t it? She seems to think so. She even placed a second death notice in The Buffalo News on my father listing HER as his daughter! She did this because SHE was removed from the original death notice that was in the paper 2 days before.
    Oh, I see – she was angry because SHE was slighted, but NOT angry because my father was slighted. What a charming loving daughter. typical of her.

    After we posted about the hate message that was placed in my father’s guest book, Joan’s male friend Russell Thomas sent me an email to my private email. He had my private email address because of an email that I had sent him a few months ago. Mr. Thomas, Joan’s puppet left me a couple of nasty comments on this blog. In the first one he called me a bitch, in a couple more he said that I don’t think straight, then another one where he backtracked and said he was only trying to help. Oh sure, I really believe that one. If he was trying to help, he wouldn’t have called me names. There were a few more, which were deleted, unread. Mr. Thomas was mad because in this blog we are laying out the bad behavior of his friend Joan. Then a few days before the anniversary of my mother’s birthday Joan writes an “honor” statement to my mother, but as usual, just has to add a degrading dig against my mother’s daughters, me and Gert and Kathy.

    Since Mr. Thomas had already assured me that he was confident that Joan was going to behave, and Joan had “hidden” this dig against us on an obscure page on her website, (which it’s purpose is supposed to be about adoption reform, NOT hurling personal insults against her own blood-kin, and which is still there). I emailed Mr. Thomas directing him to this page. (I had Mr. Thomas’ email address because he provided it when he left his stupid comments on this blog). I must point out that I emailed Mr. Thomas ONCE and ONCE ONLY. He emailed me back, via my private email, saying something about what Joan wrote was “pretty scathing,” but no worse than what we have written on this blog. Again, I didn’t read his entire message, and deleted it. The reason I didn’t read it is because I could see that Mr. Thomas is not interested in the TRUTH, which is what is written here on this blog. He is only interested in defending his new friend Joan. Mr. Thomas also left a comment on a public forum (a separate public forum elsewhere on the net), accusing me of objecting to Joan’s existence. – Wrong. Joan had gone on this forum, and again, violated the privacy of MY family, telling things that happened to the Sippel family AFTER the year 1957, the year she was adopted OUT of the Sippel family. AND she didn’t even tell these things truthfully. I went on the forum, and gave the CORRECT events of MY childhood. And why should Mr. Thomas, a STRANGER to me, object to ME telling the TRUTH of MY childhood?
     Who the hell is Mr. Thomas to tell Ruth Pace that she can not tell the truth of her own childhood? And who the hell is Joan Wheeler that she can go on public internet forums and tell LIES about MY childhood?

   After Mr. Thomas sent me the email admitting to Joan’s “scathing” post, I notified him via this blog, which I know he reads, NOT to contact me via my private email address, and to stop leaving hate messages on this blog. So a couple of days later, I see ANOTHER email via my private email address from Mr. Thomas. I deleted it unread. I left another message on this blog that Mr. Thomas was now a HARASSER – because he contacted me via my private email AFTER I told him not to.

    After Gert and I posted that an eyewitness witnessed Mr. Thomas as the one who desecrated my father’s guest book, Mr. Thomas contacted me AGAIN via my private email. I posted a notice on this blog, for legal purposes, on public internet, that Mr. Thomas was now actively harassing me with unwanted contact. This man is a stranger to me and my family, he has no business commenting on MY family, or on MY childhood. The purpose of this blog is take a lie that Joan Wheeler has placed in her book, and to refute that lie – to tell the TRUTH of MY own childhood. IT IS MY CHILDHOOD, MY LIFE, THAT I AM WRITING ABOUT MR. THOMAS, AND YOU DO NOT HAVE THE RIGHT TO TELL ME THAT I CAN NOT WRITE ABOUT IT!

    So getting back to the desecration of the guest book and the events preceding my father’s funeral. In 2006, my father, pre-paid for all his and his wife’s funeral and related arrangements, even writing out the death notice and obituary for the newspaper. Yes, Joan was included in it. In 2008 and 2009, Joan insulted my father to the point that he had to throw her out of his house (again). My father told her at that time not to come around him anymore. He then went to the funeral home, and REMOVED Joan from his papers. My father REMOVED Joan’s name from his death notice and obituary. On or about November 15, 2010, I spoke to my father and he told me that he was “done with Joan. I don’t want to see her.”

    Just after New Years, 2011, Joan’s adoptive mother “took a turn for the worse,” and Joan writes on a forum that she is “dreading” her death. So she decides to go visit my father, although he told her not to come around. She came to his apartment on January 4, 2011, with Mr. Thomas and entered the unlocked door. My stepmother, frail and on permanent oxygen, was frightened. Joan got information out of her – that my father was in the hospital. Joan and Mr. Thomas then went to the hospital to see my father AFTER he told her to stay away from him. Supposedly, according to Mr. Thomas, Joan apologized to my father. Mr. Thomas wrote a comment on this blog saying that he “thinks” my father forgave her. Then he said if he didn’t forgive her, that it was my father’s problem. Excuse me, Mr. Thomas, who the hell are YOU to say that my father, just days from his death had a “problem?” Then, further in Mr. Thomas’ comment, he begins to LECTURE me on forgiving!!!
    Again, I ask, just who the hell does this man think he is that he can LECTURE me?

    Because of Joan’s HARASSMENT of a sick, weak and dying man, — yes HARASSMENT – she had been told STAY AWAY, DON’T CALL- by my father, but as usual, she thinks she will do what SHE wants, with a total disregard for anybody’s else feelings and wants! Because of this HARASSMENT – the entire family barred Joan from the hospital. And just a couple of hours after his death, as the family sat about his body, saying their goodbyes, Joan calls AGAIN! The person who answered held the receiver at arm’s length – “It’s Joan. What should I tell her?” THE FAMILY  in unison, said, “no, tell her nothing. we don’t want her here.” So she was told, “you just missed him.” Twenty minutes later, Joan calls AGAIN! (is she learning impaired, she can’t understand English? What part of DON’T CALL, does she NOT get?) This time, I answered the phone. I looked at the family, with a look of helplessness, – they knew who was on the line. They shook their heads. I said, “he is unavailable,” and hung up.
    Later on that evening, Joan got hold of a family member and was told that my father had died. “it would have been nice if I had been told,”she commplained.  NO, it wouldn’t have. What happened the last time someone told her of a relative’s death? On November 3, 2009, I learned that an aunt of mine died. And Joan was originally named for her. I called my father and told him. Knowing that he had thrown Joan out of his house several months before, I was not sure if he still had her phone number. So I just came out and asked him. He sounded very tired. To save him the trouble of talking to Joan, I called Joan to tell her about Aunt Doris. I did not go around sneaking around asking relatives for your phone number Joan. So stop telling people that LIE! After I told Joan that Aunt Doris died, Joan subjected me to verbal abuse. Screaming obscenities at me. Who the hell does Joan think she is, that she can do this to another human being? Since Joan can’t act like an adult, and BEHAVE herself, she was NOT informed of my father’s death. Again, Joan, it is YOUR behavior that dictates how other people act towards you. If you act like an idiot, you will be treated like an idiot.

And why is she complaining, “It would have have been nice if I had been told” anyway? My first reaction on hearing my father had died was to scream and cry and my husband needing to calm me down. What is Joan’s reaction? She complains.

    The following day, Wednesday, January 12, Gert came into town and was at my father’s apartment with our elderly stepmother. She was at the ktichen table while our stepmother was nearby clearing her answering machine. Gert heard several messages from Joan from the day before, one in particular, Joan stated clearly “I will keep calling until I find out about my father.” How dare you Joan? You were told NOT TO CALL! You know my father was in the hospital, therefore you are going to HARASS an elderly woman because you wanted to know what was going on? Who the hell appointed YOU the boss of the family that YOU will dictate that YOU will keep calling AFTER you have been told NOT TO CALL?

    The family, however, decided to be nice to Joan, and granted her a private viewing time (4:30pm, after the rest of the family had left) at the funeral home. She showed up with Mr. Thomas. At 4pm, as the family was leaving, Joan’s daughter, alone, came in and spoke a few minutes with Gert. As we left, she was standing at the casket, her back was towards the guest book.

    I am not sure of the exact time frame of the events, but two different people related the following to us. These people being the funeral director and a woman, a cousin of an old high school friend of one of the Three Sippel Sisters. She saw Joan enter the room with a man. She noticed the strong family resemblance of Joan to us. She also heard Joan complain loudly to the funeral director that she was “his (my father) daughter and she was not in the death notice. This woman was standing behind Mr. Thomas and saw him write someting long in the guest book. Then he flipped the pages and wrote something else. Then he left the guest book, and she went up to sign her name, and noted the name he had just written – Russell Thomas. She signed her name after his, flipped the pages back to see what else he had written, and was shocked to see the hate message. The next day, after some calling around to other mutual friends to get a current phone number, she called one of us Sippel Sisters and told us what had occurred. This woman would have no reason to lie.

     At 6:45pm, when Gert and I found the hate message and scribbled it out – we questioned the funeral director. He told us that “this party,” and he pointed to Joan’s name in the guest book, did behave herself, and he saw for himself, Joan and her daughter standing at the casket. which would mean that their backs were towards the guest book. Joan’s daughter related to me in one facebook private message that she came “alone.” Then in another message she says that she was with her mother and Mr. Thomas and Mr. Thomas was with her at the casket, he never excused himself. This shows me, number 1, a contradiction between the 2 messages, in what she wrote – how can she be “alone,” then with her mother and Mr. Thomas? Number 2, this is a direct contradiction of what the funeral director told us. Number 3, what would Mr. Thomas excusing himself prove anything?  Unless Joan’s daughter has eyes in the back of her head, she doens’t know WHAT Mr. Thomas was doing at the guest book.

    Now remember, I said how I told Mr. Thomas NOT to contact me via my private email address? Well guess what? He did – on Monday, January 17. so he read my blog about us finding out that he was the one who desecrated our father’s guest book. And he contacts me AGAINST MY DIRECT WISHES AND ORDERS to profess his innocence. HA! And so dam quickly to! Usually the guilty party is the one who very quickly points out that they didnt’ do it. And in his email, Mr. Thomas goes out of his way on how he “honored” my father, a veteran. And how he, (Mr. Thomas) honors those who fought for our country. what’s that got to do with anything? I found that rather strange – why go out of your way to tell me that you honor those who fought for our country? Is that statement relevant to the topic? I also honor our veteran’s – I don’t bring it up in this blog – because IT IS NOT RELEVANT TO THE TOPIC AT HAND! and as for “honoring” my father – how was Mr. Thomas honoring him in his comment on this blog that he had a “problem?” Mr. Thomas then says that I haven’t seen his (Mr. Thomas’) “nice” side. So in that he admits he has been showing me his evil side. Excuse me, buddy – I am not interested in seeing any of your sides, because you just caught in a contradiction, and in bringing up veterans, you are sucking up to me because my husband is a former Navy Seal. In fact, when I told my husband what Mr. Thomas wrote in his email, he said, “he’s running scared.” That’s right – you should be scared Mr. Thomas. After what you wrote in my father’s guest book, you deserve a good beat down. And if you EVER come near me, I won’t need my husband, – if you lay a hand on me, I will take care of you myself. And don’t think for a minute that I’m not capable of it.

    And where is Joan’s anger at what was written in my father’s guest book? It was a desecration of my father and my mother – Joan’s birth parents! The message invoked the names of my mother’s brothers – 4 dead men and one living man, who at the time of the forging of his name in the book, was in Florida. Joan has not ONCE acknowledged or condemned this desecration aimed at her birth parents. WHY NOT JOAN?  But she sure was angry enough to have been omitted in the first newspaper death notice that she went out of her way to call the newspaper and have another death notice printed. BUT SAYS NOTHING TO DEFEND HER FATHER – THE ONE SHE WAS ARGUING WITH THE FUNERAL DIRECTOR THAT SHE WAS HIS DAUGHTER AND CALLS THE NEWSPAPER! Ah, yes, actions do indeed speak louder than words. She can complain that she wasn’t notifed that her birth father had died. She can complain that she got left out of the death notice, but she can’t complain that somebody desecrated her birth father’s guest book?

   In the past, Joan has gone on internet forums and spoken on how she is facing the impending death of 3 parents. Her adoptive mother, her birth father, and her stepmother (wife of her birth father). I know of at least three times she had addressed this issue. And again, on January 14, 3 days after my father’s death, she goes on the adult adoptee forum and again mentions her adoptive mother’s impending death. But Joan DOES NOT MENTION THAT HER BIRTH FATHER HAD JUST DIED 3 DAYS BEFORE! (correction – it was January 18, 2011, that Joan was on the forum, not the 14th.  – rp.).

Why not?  The 14th was the day that her birth father was laid out in the funeral home and she was granted a private time to say goodbye. Her thoughts were supposed to be on how her birth father had died. the man who gave her life was dead, and instead of grieving, she’s on the dam internet responding to a request for adoption research.    Oh, but just 10 days before, she just HAD to go to him to apologize? BULLSHIT! She was busy on January 14, all right,concoting the message that she wanted Mr. Thomas to write in the guest book.  (correction – it was January 18, 2011, that Joan was on the forum, not the 14th. But I still have to wonder where her mind was on the 14th that she would allow such a desecration to take place. – rp.).

And the reason she wrote it, or rather got someone else to do her dirty work, is because she was pissed that the entire family barred her from the funeral and the church service. She wanted to hurt my stepmother, my sisters, and me. But no, she didn’t hurt us, all she accomplished was to give us another opportunity to show the entire world what she is all about – a spoiled little bitch. An evil bitch at that.

   Joan is also too busy with another project to have the time to publicly acknowledge the death of her birth father (and watch – AFTER she reads this blog post – is when she will write a stupid blog post “honoring” him). What is Joan busy with? Trolling relatives of my mother’s facebook pages and sending friend requests to people that don’t even know her! umm, Joan, that is called cyber-stalking, and isn’t that what YOU keep accusing US of doing? Two faced hypocrite Joan Wheeler shows the world what an ass she is – yet again!

    Now that my father is buried, again, I ask Joan: WHERE IS YOUR INDIGNATION OVER THE DESECRATION OF YOUR BIRTH PARENTS?
She doesn’t even step forward to defend her buddy, her puppet, Russell Thomas. Why not? Because SHE KNOWS HE DID IT AT HER REQUEST!

And now the whole world knows it too. Joan Mary Wheeler and Russell D. Thomas – YOU will be the ones rotting in hell forever. You are already rotting in this life – you two lowdown scums deserve each other. Pigs, swine. filthy pigs. I’d spit on you, but I don’t want to sully even my spit. I don’t want my spit or even any other body waste fluid of mine contaminated with the touch of you two disgusting bitchs. You are an abuser of the elderly Joan – you struck your own elderly mother, harassed my elderly former foster mother, harassed my elderly father on his death bed, harassed his widow via phone after she lost her husband,– Joan Wheeler – GO TO HELL AND ROT!

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