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Joan Wheeler, con artist, scams the writer’s group she is in to promote her own agenda of adoption reform – in Joan’s own words May 25, 2011

Posted by Ruth in Announcements and updates, Black and White Evidence of Joan Wheeler's Lies: Letters, Court Documents, Contradictions of Joan Wheeler, Refuting Joan Wheelers statements.
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 by Ruth Sippel Pace

Earlier today, May 25, 2011, I posted Joan Wheeler has conned another person about her book of lies, Forbidden Family Part 2. In it I copied and pasted Joan’s own words from the Adult Adoptees Advocating for Change forum. I want to do that again, in this post, to highlight Joan’s behavior, a behavior that I did not touch on in my previous post. – Her USING and MANIPULATING people again – those being the members of this writing group that she joined several months ago.

 Joan went out on a recon-mission to promote her agenda. Think about this timing… she tells the forum about the writer’s group and her proposed infiltrating into that group to get them to talk about BC and adoption etc. Over time some of these people probably had brought the book, she did have about 3 books sold in April and that got her all excited and asked this poor woman to help her with a ‘thank you’ to those nasty sisters. And this was ALL DONE BEFORE TRAFFORD CALLED HER. (about pulling the book from publication).

 Here is Joan’s own words on what she wanted the writer’s group for:

 writers’ groups and adoption reform

« on: February 18, 2011, 12:36:14 PM »

1adoptee:
Hi gang! I found a new avenue to get adoption reform issues to the general public: local writing groups.

Here’s what I’ve been doing for the last few months. I found a local writer’s group and started attending meetings. I sat in for awhile before bringing in some of my own writings. When I got up the courage, I brought in a first draft of an online comment in response to an article posted on some online Newspaper.

The group I belong to requires members to pass out copies of their works. Members read and reflect on what’s written, and then write down their critique of the piece. A moderator goes from person to person and each one says out loud what they like, dislike, and ways to improve the piece. After everyone gets a chance to talk, the author of the piece addresses the group’s concerns.
 
So when it was my turn last night, I passed around a draft of a comment I was working on. The critique is supposed to center around the writing itself, but, as you know, people get caught up in their perceptions of adoption and then give their opinions of adoption, without really understanding that the piece I wrote is about adoption reform. We had a rousing discussion of what adoption is, and when it got to my turn to speak, I pointed out that every adoptee has two birth certificates and there is pending legislation in various states for adoptee access to their sealed records. This was an excellent way to educate the general public, at least the people in the room, and, at the same time, get feedback on my own writing style.

So, for those of you out there who are writers, pop in at your local writers group. Bring your own works with you, share them, and spread the word!

  Re: writers’ groups and adoption reform

« Reply #6 on: February 22, 2011, 11:56:59 AM »

1adoptee:
Yeah, the rainbow-farters are all upset and they whine, “Why should I adopt a child if this stuff is going on?” and the usual, “My sister adopted three kids and my friend has an adopted child…” It was really hard not to bite their headds off, but I said this isn’t about adoptive parents,, this is about an adoptee’s right to her original birth certificate. The room of about ten people found it difficult to focus on why I brought my one-page letter to them. It was a draft and I wanted suggestions as to how to make it a better essay. One or two of the people actually focused on the group’s activities: writing! Next meeting I’ll bring copies of my original and amended birth certificates for them to see what really happens…should be interesting to hear the discussion then! Fear, yeah, I fell it. But it also feels good to get the message out!

 end of comments

Notice how she disrespects the group members and calls them “rainbow farters.” And she wanted to bite their heads off. Then she says she will bring her birth certificates to the next meeting. Is the group a WRITER’S group or a POLITICAL group? As usual, Joan wants to ram HER agenda down people’s throats. It would have been a different story if Joan were asked by the membership to bring in her BC’s and enlighten them, but noooo, Joan doesn’t WAIT to be asked – she simply TAKES OVER AND RAMS HER OWN OPINIONS DOWN OTHER’S THROATS and if they disagree with her – she smells and feels their “fear,” calls them names – and fairly relishes the idea that she will be disrupting the next meeting. As of this writing, that meeting has taken place. Joan does not report on the forum what transpired.

 Joan uses and manipulates people – she is a true bully. She is a mastermind at conning people.

 As for the “rainbow” farters –  they are adults (I think). As for myself, I happen to like rainbows. They are pretty. Much prettier than the two-faced compliments that Joan doles out to those who she wants to use. If she has a use for you, she’s all nice to your face. But see in JOAN’S OWN WORDS, what she REALLY thinks of the writer’s group.

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Joan Wheeler has conned another person about her book of lies, Forbidden Family Part 2 May 25, 2011

Posted by Ruth in Announcements and updates, Black and White Evidence of Joan Wheeler's Lies: Letters, Court Documents, Joan Wheeler Speak - how Joan views the world, Lessons in Life, Refuting Joan Wheelers statements, Uncategorized.
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 by Ruth Sippel Pace

In my post of May 24, 2011, Joan Wheeler has conned another person about her book of lies, Forbidden Family,  I blog about how a poor woman got conned into buying one of the few remaining copies of this lying book. She then wrote a “review” of it on amazon.com. The “review” was no such thing. The “review” was simply adoptee rhetoric about birth certificates, and bringing up the subject of Barrack Obama and Donald Trump, which has nothing to do with the book. And it is clear, the woman didn’t read the book very well. Anyways, in doing some research, we find that this woman is a youth pastor, is a writer, and is part of a writer’s group in the north suburbs of Buffalo, NY.

BEFORE WE CONTINUE AN UPDATE, FEBRUARY 2016, as older posts are being seen I’m updating with links to my second blog and a Facebook page wherein I expose AGAIN the lies, fabrications and hate that Joan M Wheeler says about me and family. After the first book was pulled from publication by the publisher, May 2011, she has ‘self-published’ another ‘revised’ version. In this ‘version’ called ‘duped by adoption’ she has increased her exploitation by including PICTURES and REAL NAMES and much more personal information violating again the families. Joan has no decency NOR shame. There is NOTHING in this book for adoption reform. She is totally against adoption and her two families. To learn more see…

https://gertmcqueen2.wordpress.com/

https://www.facebook.com/dupedbyadoption1

NOW CONTINUING ON WITH THIS POST   

 In Gert’s post of May 10, 2011, Joan Wheeler’s book Forbidden Family has been pulled from publication part 2 – Joan thanks her birth sisters for exposing her lies. Gert tells of Joan adding a page on her Forbidden Family site, which she uses as a dig against us birth sisters, under the tab “Thank You”. Gert says in her post: “… she (Joan) has found herself a writing ‘coach’, for these 4 paragraphs are NOT fully Joan Wheeler’s words. How do I know? Because I have read and know Joan’s writing style and her choice of words, as they are written in her book and on various web sites, and they are not used in this smug ‘thank you’. “

 It is now clear who her writing coach is: Ruth Willerth of Smattersings Books, a self-described Christian writer and a youth pastor.

 Now back on February 18, 2011, and February 22, 2011, Joan, under her member name of 1adoptee, on the Adult Adoptees Advocating for Change forum posted the following:

 writers’ groups and adoption reform

« on: February 18, 2011, 12:36:14 PM »

1adoptee:
Hi gang! I found a new avenue to get adoption reform issues to the general public: local writing groups.

Here’s what I’ve been doing for the last few months. I found a local writer’s group and started attending meetings. I sat in for awhile before bringing in some of my own writings. When I got up the courage, I brought in a first draft of an online comment in response to an article posted on some online Newspaper.

The group I belong to requires members to pass out copies of their works. Members read and reflect on what’s written, and then write down their critique of the piece. A moderator goes from person to person and each one says out loud what they like, dislike, and ways to improve the piece. After everyone gets a chance to talk, the author of the piece addresses the group’s concerns.
 
So when it was my turn last night, I passed around a draft of a comment I was working on. The critique is supposed to center around the writing itself, but, as you know, people get caught up in their perceptions of adoption and then give their opinions of adoption, without really understanding that the piece I wrote is about adoption reform. We had a rousing discussion of what adoption is, and when it got to my turn to speak, I pointed out that every adoptee has two birth certificates and there is pending legislation in various states for adoptee access to their sealed records. This was an excellent way to educate the general public, at least the people in the room, and, at the same time, get feedback on my own writing style.

So, for those of you out there who are writers, pop in at your local writers group. Bring your own works with you, share them, and spread the word!

 Re: writers’ groups and adoption reform

« Reply #6 on: February 22, 2011, 11:56:59 AM »

1adoptee:
Yeah, the rainbow-farters are all upset and they whine, “Why should I adopt a child if this stuff is going on?” and the usual, “My sister adopted three kids and my friend has an adopted child…” It was really hard not to bite their headds off, but I said this isn’t about adoptive parents,, this is about an adoptee’s right to her original birth certificate. The room of about ten people found it difficult to focus on why I brought my one-page letter to them. It was a draft and I wanted suggestions as to how to make it a better essay. One or two of the people actually focused on the group’s activities: writing! Next meeting I’ll bring copies of my original and amended birth certificates for them to see what really happens…should be interesting to hear the discussion then! Fear, yeah, I fell it. But it also feels good to get the message out!

End of comments

Now, let us review this evidence:

 Joan went out on a recon-mission to promote her agenda. Think about this timing… she tells the forum about the writer’s group and her proposed infiltrating into that group to get them to talk about BC and adoption etc. Over time some of these people probably had brought the book, she did have about 3 books sold in April and that got her all excited and asked this poor woman to help her with a ‘thank you’ to those nasty sisters. And this was ALL DONE BEFORE TRAFFORD CALLED HER,. So then when she gets the word that the book is being pulled she harasses and browbeats this woman, Joan is an expert browbeater, to purchase the book so that she could do a review…remember you have to be a customer to write a review…that’s why the woman HAD TO BUY the book to leave a new and revised ‘agenda’ for the book. What bullshit.

 Well, here is my message to Pastor Ruth and the other members of that writer’s group: discuss long and hard about the book Forbidden Family – learn your lessons well: how NOT to try to con your publisher. How NOT to lie and say it is a non-fiction book that is the truth, when it is full of slander and libel. How NOT to publish a photograph that you don’t own the copyrights to.

Joan Wheeler’s book Forbidden Family is a case study on how NOT to write and publish a book.

Pastor Ruth and her writer’s group ought to print out this email I sent to Mr. Eugene Hopkins of Trafford Publishing. They need to study it and further learn from Joan Wheeler’s mistakes.

May 16, 2011 –

Eugene Hopkins

Trafford, Author Solutions

Dear Mr. Hopkins,

I am the younger sister of Gert McQueen, with whom you have been in discussions with for the past few months over the book that your company published, “Forbidden Family” by Joan M. Wheeler.

I know that you had received our complaint about this book back on January 21, 2011. I also emailed you my co-complaint on this book. Included in my email, I attached several scanned official court documents pertaining to court cases between Ms. Wheeler and myself.

It is my understanding that recently you remarked to Gert that you were reluctant to get involved in a “family squabble.” Mr. Hopkins, Ms. Wheeler ceased to be a legal family member to us when she was adopted out of our family in 1957. Although we were reunited in 1974, I cut ties with her in 1990 after she stole hundreds of dollars from me. She further alienated herself to me in 1993 when she filed a false police report against me, over phone calls that I placed to her house, (in response to a letter she sent me). I called her house, and she said to me “hold on,” and hung up on me.  She then reported to the police that I was placing threatening calls to her. I was summoned into court and Ms. Wheeler was granted a six-month order of protection against me.

In her book, that your company published, she records this incident, but claims that I was placed under arrest (I was not.), that she was granted a one-year order of protection against me (it was for six-months), that I was placed on probation (I was not), and that I have a criminal record (I do not). 

I covered this and more in my emailed complaint to you and provided the actual court documents that prove that Ms. Wheeler lied, committing the crime of LIBEL in her book, that your company published.

In another part of her book, Ms. Wheeler describes a three month court battle between me and her in the year of 1994. This is completely false.

Also, on the back cover of the book, which your company published, is a family photograph that is of my parents, my siblings, and myself. Ms. Wheeler herself is NOT in the photograph at all – and the picture was taken BEFORE Ms. Wheeler was not even born, therefore, she wasn’t even a member of the family pictured on the back of her book. I have never given Ms. Wheeler permission, orally, or in writing, permission to use my photograph on her book. Also, since the photograph was taken sometime mid-1955, and Ms. Wheeler was born on January 7, 1956, and then 4 months later adopted out of the family, she does not OWN this photograph. She may “own” a paper copy of this photo, but since she was NOT a legal member of the family depicted in the photo, she does NOT have the legal right to publish it and gain monetary gain from it.

Whether you think of me and Ms. Wheeler as “family members” or not has no bearing on the basis of our complaint – that is being that Ms. Wheeler (and your company) has/have published my picture without my legal consent. In lying about a three month court case between us in 1994, and lying about the length of time the order of protection granted to her in 1993, Ms. Wheeler is presenting falsehoods about the City Court of the City of Buffalo. When Ms. Wheeler presents in her book that I was placed under arrest, she is presenting falsehoods about the Buffalo Police Department.

Further, may I ask you Mr. Hopkins, should a person be subjected to such slander and libel with no recourse, simply because they are related to the perpetrator? The issue of Ms. Wheeler being related to me and Gert is a NON-issue. Ms. Wheeler lied in her book. That is all that should concern you.

Gert tells me that several times in her conversations with you, you have told her that our complaint is in your legal department, and you have yet to hear back from your lawyers.

On your website is the Terms and Conditions for authors to agree to when submitting their work for publication. I cite the following items that Ms. Wheeler is in violation of YOUR own Terms and Conditions.

2. YOUR LEGAL RESPONSIBILITY

2.1. You represent that (i) you are the sole copyright owner of the Work and all of its content.

   Ms. Wheeler is in violation of this because she has MY likeness on the back of her book, WITHOUT my consent.

2.4. You further represent that the Work does not contain illegal, unlawful or objectionable material including, but not limited to, pornography, obscenity or hate speech. You acknowledge that the Work is not plagiarized and does not include

falsely attributed statements of third parties.

.    Ms. Wheeler is in violation of the second sentence, because as I pointed out above, she has lied about actual court proceedings between her and me.

I further cite YOUR Terms and Conditions as presented to authors on your website:

7. TERMINATION OF AGREEMENT

7.1. Suspension of Services. Upon a breach, default, or failure by you to comply with these Terms and Conditions or the failure to cooperate with us in the provision of any Services, we will have the right to suspend any or all performance until you cooperate with these Terms and Conditions and/or cooperate with us in the provision of Services.

Since I have just pointed out that Ms. Wheeler IS in violation of 2.1 and 2.4 of YOUR Terms and Conditions as presented on your website, Mr. Hopkins, you have NO choice, but to pull the book Forbidden Family off the market, your website, and your advertisement of it on Amazon.com. I don’t understand why your lawyers cannot come up with a timely interpretation of your own terms and conditions, the definition of the term libel, and the application of the term libel to Ms. Wheeler’s statements of me in her book that you published.

On page 670 of the Tenth Edition (1994) of the Merriam-Webster’s Collegiate Dictionary are the following definitions of the term LIBEL:

–          A written or oral defamatory statement or representation that conveys an unjustly unfavorable impression.

–          A statement or representation published without just cause and tending to expose another to public contempt.

–          Defamation of a person by written or representable means

–          The act, tort, or crime of publishing such a libel

I believe that all four definitions cover what Ms. Wheeler has done in her book. By falsely reporting in her book that I have an arrest record, she is conveying a unjustly unfavorable impression.

You have stated to Mrs. McQueen that you do not want to be in the middle of a “family squabble.” This is no “family squabble.” It is accurate accusation of libel and a justifiable demand for the pulling of this book.

I expect to be hearing shortly on your decision to do a right and lawful action: the pulling of this libelous book.

Thank you for your help in this matter.

Very sincerely yours,

Mrs. Ruth Pace

cc: Kevin Weiss; Kevin A. Gray; Gert McQueen

Joan Wheeler has conned another person about her book of lies, Forbidden Family May 24, 2011

Posted by Ruth in Announcements and updates, Lessons in Life, Uncategorized.
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by Ruth Sippel Pace

Some poor lady actually parted with her good money to buy this lying book from Amazon.com and then she left a “review” – she didn’t even read the book, because her review wasn’t even about the book, it was mostly about Barrack Obama and Donald Trump. Some people just love mixing apples and oranges.

So Gert and I left a couple of comments – and when I went there – I saw another person had left a comment – not a review, but a reminder – that this book was pulled from publication. Thank You Andrea, who ever you are.

So here is the new “review” and the comments posted by Gert and myself:

 Timely Informative, May 23, 2011

By

Ruth Willerth “SmatteringsBooks”

This review is from: Forbidden Family (Paperback)

Forbidden Family by Joan M Wheeler is timely considering it took the resources of Donald Trump to make public President Obama’s birth certificate. I’m so glad to find out that he really is an American. I live in the part of America that must produce whatever forms government says we must like birth certificates, social security cards, photo id… Being one of millions of Americans not understanding Hawaii seals all birth certificates from the public, I wonder… How the public would respond if our president was adopted so had two conflicting birth certificates?

Ruth Willerth
Knife of Truth series consulting editor

 Gert’s comment to this “review” – posted to Amazon

 It is obvious that this ‘reviewer’ HAS NEVER read the contents of this book! This reviewer obviously is a personal friend of Joan Wheeler and has become yet another person conned and duped by Joan. For a person who makes money for providing reviews she really ought to be more careful about which books she is reviewing. Joan’s book of lies has over 600 pages and perhaps only about 200 of them any information about adoption reform including birth certificates. Those other 400 pages are hateful lies and misrepresentations towards both birth and adoptive families and that is WHY the book has been pulled from the selling market, by the publisher.

 Ruth’s comment, posted on Amazon:

 I have to wonder about this other Ruth. “Timely” she says? Um Ms. Willerth, this book of lies came out a year and a half ago. What was “timely” was YOUR purchasing it. And I agree with Gert – you didn’t even READ it, before you posted your review. But by all means, keep reading it – I wonder how you will feel about this book when you get to the part where Ms. Wheeler trashes the Catholic Church.

 Seeing as you are a youth pastor, perhaps you can help Joan learn the 10 Commandments, particularly the ones about honoring one’s parents, not stealing, not lying. Please go to my blog at https://ruthsippelpace.wordpress.com/ to see actual proof of Joan’s violations of the 10 commandments.

And please do your research as to why this book is no longer being published – because the publisher found out about the slander and libel and Joan stealing MY photograph for the back cover – a photograph that she does NOT own the copyright to – a violation of the rules of the publisher – hence, the book was pulled. The copies listed here on Amazon are just those left over from the first publishing run, and the book will not be printed again.

People are now being informed about the demise of Forbidden Family by Joan Wheeler May 23, 2011

Posted by Ruth in Announcements and updates, Joan Wheeler's abuse and harassment of her birth family, Refuting Joan Wheelers statements.
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by Gert McQueen
 
There are so many people that have to be informed about the removal of Joan Wheeler’s book of lies. Here I want to share a couple of emails that I sent but have not received any reply. No reply is really needed, it is the information that they received that is important. I’ve only just begun to spread the word!

To: joesoll@adoptionhealing.com 

Cc: Gert McQueen

Sent: Fri, May 13, 2011 1:43:15 PM
Subject: about book Forbidden Family

Mr. Soll,

 I want to inform you about the recent development regarding the book Forbidden Family by Joan Wheeler. As you may recall I had written to you a few months back and your reply was very helpful. Thank you again for that reply.

 In recent months I, and my other sister Ruth, have informed the publisher, Trafford Publications, of the many errors, outright lies, slanderous and libelous statements and other various forms of hate speech in the book. We provided documented proof of those assertions. We asked them to review it and pull it from publication.

 That is what has recently happen. Trafford pulled the book, will not print any more copies of the book, as it is, and any rewrite that Joan Wheeler submits, will be very very carefully looked at.

 It is unfortunate that such a book, as written by Joan, was used to promote adoption reform. I’m sure that she will continue with the belief that it is an accurate account and valuable for her causes and agendas; that  view is strictly untrue and it and that book will not help the true cause of adoption reform.

 Again, this note is just to inform you of the dispension of birth family’s quest to have a book of lies and hate, that Joan wrote, was indeed removed from publication.

 Thank you very much

 Gert McQueen

 To: lewellen.singley@gmail.com
Cc: Gert McQueen

Sent: Fri, May 13, 2011 1:42:47 PM
Subject: about book Forbidden Family

Ms. LewEllen,

 I want to inform you about the recent development regarding the book Forbidden Family by Joan Wheeler. As you may recall I had written to you a few months back regarding a submission by Joan to your publication offices. You and I then had a brief email exchange.

 In recent months I, and another sister, have informed the publisher, Trafford Publications, of the many errors, outright lies, slanderous and libelous statements and other various forms of hate speech in the book. We provided documented proof of those assertions. We asked them to review it and pull it from publication.

 That is what has recently happen. Trafford Publications pulled the book, will not print any more copies of the book, as it is, and any rewrite that Joan Wheeler submits, will be very very carefully looked at.

 It is unfortunate that such a book, as written by Joan, was used to promote adoption reform. I’m sure that she will continue with the belief that it is an accurate account and valuable for her causes and agendas; that  view is strictly untrue and it and that book will not help the true cause of adoption reform.

 This note is just to inform you of the dispension of birth family’s quest to have a book of lies and hate, that Joan wrote, was indeed removed from publication. I seriously wonder how any submission, on any aspect of adoption reunions, written by Joan Wheeler, would be of any benefit to the many that truly need quality advise. But that is your call.

 Thank you very much

 Gert McQueen 

My comment, concerning Forbidden Family by Joan Wheeler, on the Daily Bastardette May 21, 2011

Posted by Ruth in Announcements and updates, Refuting Joan Wheelers statements.
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by Ruth Sippel Pace

A year and a half ago, I left a comment on the blog Daily Bastardette. I didn’t copy and paste what I wrote, and I don’t remember what I wrote. But it was my rebuttal to Joan’s lying statements on a CBS internet article “Adoptees Face Sting of Discrimination.” Joan distorted facts of MY childhood in it. So I tried to correct the facts. My comments were not published on that site. I had then gone to the Daily Bastardette and was reading the blog owner’s praise for Joan’s statements on the CBS article. So I left my comment, again, trying to straighten out Joan’s lies. The blog owner did not see fit to publish my comment. That is her right. But I wanted the truth to get out. I reasoned, “if Joan get her lies out, how can I get the truth out?” So I started this blog. Yes, Marley, it was YOUR rejection of my comment that was the impetus of this blog. Thank you. As you yourself quote Cesar Chavez on your blog “You cannot oppress the people that are not afraid anymore.” I was never afraid, just feeling oppressed.

Anyway, today, Saturday, May 21, 2011, I left another comment on the Daily Bastardette. We’ll see if Ms. Greiner publishes it. She probably won’t. It doesn’t conform to her way of thinking. That won’t shut me up though. Because I got my own blog to get my truth out. And it is getting out. And so, here is what I submitted to the Daily Bastardette. Notice, that not once in it, do I call Joan an asshole, or urge her to commit suicide. Never left comments on the internet that said that. That is just another lie told by Joan Wheeler.

Dear Ms. Greiner,

I want to give you an update.

A year and a half ago, I left a comment on this blog, the post “Joan Wheeler is a baaad girl,” November 23, 2009. You didn’t see fit to publish it. That was your right. I was only trying to get out my opinion. Well, seeing as how my opinion didn’t conform to your thinking, I started my own blog.

 In your blogpost about Joan, you mention her forthcoming book, “Forbidden Family.”  It might interest you to know that on May 9, 2011, Joan’s book was pulled from publication, by the publisher, due to the book’s slanderous and libelous nature, the inclusion of hate and obscene language, and the use of a certain photograph on the back cover that Ms. Wheeler did not have copyrights to. These are all violations of the terms and conditions set forth by the publisher, and not ME.

Yes, I am one of Joan’s “horrible” birth sisters. Our cause is not to undermine YOUR cause in any way. Frankly, we don’t care about it. You must do what YOU feel is right for yourself. And so does Joan. HOWEVER, when a cause distorts the truth or outright lies are told, something must done.

In her book, on her website, and on various forums on the internet, Joan has distorted the facts of her adoption, her birth family’s lives, and the aftermath of our reunion. She has told outright LIES about me and other members of my family.

You give this advice on your blog: “Hit your blogs, Bastards never shut up.”

Well, wronged individuals never shut up either. Joan has done wrong to her birth family since 1980, then self-publishes a book full of hate directed at every person in her life that ever disagreed with her.

You may approve this comment for admission to your blog or not. Suppression of the truth does not diminish the validity of the truth.

end of comment

addendum: Comments are closed to this blog, because Joan had her buddies come here and leave hate messages. Joan herself has never left a comment here because she is too much of a coward to speak to us directly and answer our charges of why she lied about us. Instead, Joan, the Master Manipulator, ;manipulated weak minded individuals to do her dirty work. We Sippel Sisters have never gone to her website, or any other website and left hate messages. We deal in the Truth, Joan deals in falsehoods, fact twisting, manipulations, whining, threats of suicide to garner sympathy. She is a con-artist.

Gert McQueen answers the secret is out – more evidence of misdeeds and lies by Joan Wheeler May 19, 2011

Posted by Ruth in Black and White Evidence of Joan Wheeler's Lies: Letters, Court Documents, Joan Wheeler's abuse and harassment of her birth family, Refuting Joan Wheelers statements.
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by Gert McQueen

There are many essays or blog posts that I have written that have not been seen yet on this blog. Seeing that we are discussing and showing our EVIDENCE I feel it is time for the following to be posted. It is part of a larger essays where I discuss many pieces of evidence about Joan’s lying. And we do have the physical documents to go with it. Here we go:

BUT FIRST…UPDATE, August 2016,

as older posts are being seen I’m updating with links to my second blog and a Facebook page wherein I expose AGAIN the lies, fabrications and hate that Joan M Wheeler says about me and family. After the first book was pulled from publication by the publisher, May 2011, she has ‘self-published’ another ‘revised’ version. In this ‘version’ called ‘duped by adoption’ she has increased her exploitation by including PICTURES and REAL NAMES and much more personal information violating again the families. Joan has no decency NOR shame. There is NOTHING in this book for adoption reform. She is totally against adoption and her two families. To learn more see…

https://gertmcqueen2.wordpress.com/

https://www.facebook.com/dupedbyadoption1

keep this all in mind as you READ this EVIDENCE, then ask your self…is Joan really to be believed?

The next pieces of evidence are in connection to the article The secret is out that Joan wrote in 1990 published in England and the aftermath from it. This article caused great concern because in the article Joan uses her sisters’ real names, interestingly enough not mine. In any event, the publication of that article is what caused certain letters to be written, alerting those agencies, listed in the article, that privacy was not afforded to the persons mentioned in the article. These letters were not ‘harassments’ but legitimate letters of concern for the breach of privacy the author committed. It is only Joan who turns these letters into gross obscene letters in her fabrication of telling of them. 

As I have stated in previous posts, I did not write any letters to Joan and it is a falsehood for Joan to write in her book on pg 308 ‘…my sisters wrote harassing letters in the months after our family reunion of 92’. Which sisters? She does not say, so how can anyone be sure whom Joan is referring to?

(Ruths’ note: as usual, Joan lumps all three of her sisters as one entity. Only thing is, we didn’t write harassing letters to her, either individually or collectively.)

On pg 310 she writes ‘…the 40 page letter that my sisters put together…’ and ‘…my sisters included copies of long handwritten letters they wrote to the nine major adoption…’ Wrong! Joan does not name the sisters because there were no sisters, in the plural. Ruth and I never wrote to those nine major adoption agencies listed in the article. Kathy wrote legitimate letters of concern for the breach of privacy; all else is pure nonsense and fabrication by Joan. Furthermore, Kathy wrote an seven-page letter, not 40 pages; Joan loves hyperbole! (see graphics #4a-4g below).

Hyperbole…exaggeration: deliberate and obvious exaggeration used for effect.

Again, we shall revisit this issue, when I return to the book, after I complete this presentation of the evidence of Joan’s own behavior of fabrication, telling lies, doing harassments, and other deeds that are not in her book. For now it is sufficient to state that we three sisters, who are refuting the lies of Joan, possess proof that she is a liar and user of hyperbole solely for the effect of putting us sisters in bad light.

As part of the fallout from the breach of privacy and Joan’s consistent disregard for returning Kathy’s personal property to her, Kathy in England , demanded her property returned to her. There were negotiations; monies sent by Kathy to Joan, for shipping, back and forth letters, but all of Kathy’s efforts were stalled by Joan because Joan had excuse after excuse for not sending them.

Evidence here: In two letters that Joan wrote to Kathy (ca.1992) we learn from Joan, in one, ‘…yes I did receive the money order…put it in a special account for when I have time to pack everything for you…can’t do it right now…don’t have a car…can’t do anything right now…Colby lost his job…trying to cope with unemployment…I am working two part-time jobs…pay is low…with this new upset…going and finding your scrapbooks will just have to wait…. the records are safe…I’ll let you know when I can get the stuff together…before Christmas…’  and in another ‘…have been sad that our relationship ended abruptly and that I have caused you pain…felt the need to reach out to you…need to apologize for overstepping my bounds in your life…I respect your right to privacy and am sorry for my past behaviors…I ask forgiveness…and hope that we can be friends again…since I’m rather busy now, I will try to pack up your things sometime before Christmas…working two part-time jobs and will be going back to college in the fall…’ (see graphics 1 and 2 below).

So we see from Joan’s own words; that she did receive money to send Kathy’s things back to her, that she put the money in a special account, for when she has time, but she can’t do it now, no car, husband lost a job, coping with unemployment, working two jobs, pay is low, new upset, getting your stuff will just have to wait, let you know when I can get the stuff to you later but sad that our relationship ended abruptly and I caused you pain, need to reach out to you, to apologize, respect your right to privacy, sorry for past behaviors, ask forgiveness, can be friends, but I’m rather busy now, will try to pack your stuff before Christmas, working two jobs and going back to college in the fall.

Would you, reader, buy that brunch of boloney? She was given the money to ship the items but found excuses for not doing so and yet she has the money and time to go back to college! How nice! Priorities!

Neither did Kathy, buy it that is, and when Kathy puts the pressure on to get her property back, Joan enlists the ‘big guy’; Dr. Rene Hoksbergen, the very same that wrote the forward of this book of lies and fabrications! It ought to be noted that the last time the good Dr. saw a ‘draft’ of the book was in 2006, three years before publication! Joan has done extensive rewrites since he saw it. I wonder if Dr Hoksbergen would approve of the published work? Perhaps I shall write him! I’ll think about that!

In the meanwhile, I’ll just inform folks with, yes that’s right, evidence here, just what Dr Hoksbergen said to my sister Kathy on Joan’s behalf. (see graphic #3 below). It ought to be remembered that Joan is a very good con artist. Joan can play the part of the misused, misunderstood adoptee, that the birth family seems to go out of their way to make life miserable for her. This letter by Dr Hoksbergen was written to Kathy in April 1993.

In part he says: ‘…you will be amazed that you suddenly get a letter from a complete stranger…(goes into his educational and professional backgrounds)…connected with the phenomenon of adoption …conference in 1987 I met your sister Joan Wheeler…tried to help her with some of her questions and problems…I very well know the complexity of her life situation and emotional stress this often gives to her…sometimes we have to give adoptees some more time and understanding then we do in other occasions…conference in April I had a long discussion with Joan about many important family related questions. It has become clear to me that she is very sad about the problems she seems to have with you. It is a pity that rather uncomplicated questions of yours, has given deep going emotional stress to at least Joan and as far as I understand also to you. Let me be more clear: you have asked her to send back your goods…last year Joan had a lot of material problems…not having a car, losing her jobs etc…Joan does not have the money…(goes into detail about weight and costs)…it is an idea to ask Joan what precisely you definitely want to have back as soon as possible…the rest could be taken back slowly, when you visit your friends and relations in the USA…to my opinion problems like these should not divide people…related…who might need each other…when people live far away from each other…things easily might become complicated…I would ask you to forgive Joan what you think she did wrongly…I’m sure that her intensions are good…but she has problems to carry out the things you asked her…I know she would love it so much to have a good friendship with you…she has tried to see you in Liverpool…but she does not have the money for it…it is a useful idea if you write me back about your suggestions…if you prefer this in stead of writing directly to Joan…I know that she very much want to solve the problems you have with each other…’

Okay! Here’s what I see in this communication; first and foremost intimidation by a professional with the use of a condescending tone to a woman who has already paid to have her personal property return and is being denied justice. Secondly, what I see is, the continuation of the mixture of intimidation as well as a good dose of browbeating, which btw is somewhat common with the professional attitudes of doctors.

‘phenomenon of adoption’  …since when is adoption a phenomenon?

‘complexity of her life situation and emotional stress’ …do only adoptee have complexity and emotional stress, is this some kind of new ‘condition’ that the rest of the population doesn’t have?

‘give adoptees some more time and understanding then we do in other occasions’ …again, what makes the adoptee some kind of special needs person? Does this mean they are in the same category as the physically and mentally ‘challenged’ individuals are in (for those that are not PCs they are commonly called retarded)?

‘she is very sad about the problems she seems to have with you’ …oh so Joan needs a professional to communicate that sentiment?

‘it is a pity’ …no shit!

‘Let me be more clear’ …by all means, what he is saying is that Kathy and by extension the rest of the birth family ‘needs’ to understand the special conditions that the adoptee has and we must alter our views.

(Ruth’s note: the birth family is not considered to be human, with our own human needs, desires, etc. ONLY the adoptee matters. – BULLSHIT – I am just as IMPORTANT as the adoptee, they are NOT the center of the universe, just because in their view, they got shafted. LOTS of people the world over get shafted every day, adopted or not. Life sucks. DEAL WITH IT.)

‘Joan does not have the money’ … she was given the money, what happened to it and even if she wasn’t given the money why is it that she can’t give back someone else’s property?

(Ruth’s note: What happened to this money, that Joan says she put in a “special account?” I know what happened to it – the same thing that happened to MY money that Joan and I had in a joint checking account for the purpose of buying real estate in 1990 – Joan STOLE it – used if for HER living expenses).

‘had a lot of material problems’ …is Joan the only person in the world with problems, does not Kathy have anything in her life that should be considered here?

‘the rest could be taken back slowly, when you visit your friends and relations in the USA’   …an assumption that Kathy will be visiting the USA, was never in the negotiations to begin with, that’s a direct attempt at turning the whole thing back onto Kathy.

‘to my opinion’ …amazing that he didn’t send Kathy a bill for his opinion, what did it cost Joan for getting the doctor to write this letter?

(Ruth’s note: I wonder as well. All evidence points to  Joan and the doctor being waaay beyond professional ties.)

‘‘ask you to forgive Joan what you think she did wrongly’ …excuse me! what right does this guy have to say such a thing?

‘that her intensions are good’ …intensions my ass, any intelligent person knows that following through is what matters!

‘to have a good friendship with you’ …that falls squarely onto Joan’s shoulders and no one else!

‘it is a useful idea if you write me back.’ …no thank you!

‘that she very much want to solve the problems you have with each other’ …we have heard that before!

So there you have it, the evidence of Joan Wheeler’s own behavior of fabrication, telling lies, doing harassments, and other deeds that are not in her book, Forbidden Family.

Ruth’s additional note – examine carefully Dr. Hoksbergen letter to Kathy – Joan told him that it would cost about $500.00 to ship her belongings to her. Really? Kathy enlisted the help of our father to get her belongings back. My father never owned a car, never learned to drive. So what he did, was TAKE A TAXI-CAB to Joan’s house and get Kathy’s belongings and took them to his house, packed them up and shipped them over to Kathy in three different shipments. On July 7, 1993, the first shipment went out, costing my father $52.75. On August  7, 1993, the second shipment went out, costing $45.95. On November 23, 1993, the third and final shipment went out, costing $52.95. The total my father paid was $150.95 – far less than the $500.00 Joan led Dr. Hoskbergen to believe. And this bullshit happened only 3 years after Joan conned me out of several hundred dollars! Joan is a liar, a thief and a con-artist. She belongs in jail! The letters she wrote to Kathy in 1992 (graphics 1 and 2, are the same kind of nonsense she had feeding me in 19990 and 1991 about the money she stole from me. Apologies, crocodile tears, promises of repayment, excuse after excuse why she couldn’t pay me back, blah, blah, blah, until I finally had enough of her lies and bullshit and turned my back on her completely – I lost around $700.00 to her, and that doesn’t even cover the interest I was paying every month – yes, interest – it wasn’t even MY money Joan stole – it was money I borrowed from the bank – Joan put me into debt – I couldn’t afford to fix my car, I was forced to take a bus in the snow and cold, while Joan drove a car, which she fixed with MY (borrowed) money! As I noted above – this money was in a joint checking account to buy real estate – Joan stole it for her own day-to-day living expenses. After I washed my hands of her in 1991, she went to find another mark – she tried to play Kathy for a fool – she got 50 bucks out of Kathy. Now you know why her birth sisters turned their backs on her. Joan also did NOT return all of Kathy’s belongings: missing are valuable Beatles collectibles: Beatles bubble gum sets, copies of The Beatles Fan Club magazine, a signed sketch by original Beatle member Stuart Sutcliffe. By not returning these items (and others) – Joan is guilty of THEFT. Joan has been asked for years to return these items, I personally saw them in the attic of her house on Swinburne St. in the late 1980’s, so she cannot LIE and say she doesn’t have them.

See the graphics 5a and 5b, below – my father’s receipts! Proof positive that Joan is a liar and a con-artist and LIED to her palsie-walsie, Dr. Rene Hoksbergen. And Dr. Hoksbergen, was so stupid as to be conned by Joan, stuck his nose into our family business, and got a complaint made to his employer, Utrecht University about his unprofessionalism. He apparently didn’t learn his leasson, because in 2006, he was conned by Joan again into writing a forward to her lying book. Unless he wasn’t really conned after all – won’t be the first time a man was drawn into a woman’s web. Just look what Arnold Schwarzenegger did! The bigger they are – the harder they fall. Arnold just fell. Joan just fell. Who’s next? I sent Dr. Hoksbergen a private message via facebook for his explanation and a public apology for his contribution to this lying piece of trash book. He hasn’t responded yet. If he doesn’t, I’ll know my assessment of him is correct.

1. April 27, 1992 Joan apologizes to Kathy (breach of privacy, using Kathy’s name in Secret is Out article, offers up excuses

2. mid 1992, Joan admits to receiving Kathy’s money order, offers MORE excuses

3. Rene Hoksbergen’s letter to Kathy, April 19, 1993; says cost to ship her belongings will be $500.00

4a Kathy’s letter to Hoksbergen, May 2, 1993, page 1

4b Kathy’s letter to Hoksbergen, May 2, 1993, page 2

4c Kathy’s letter to Hoksbergen, May 2, 1993, page 3

4d Kathy’s letter to Hoksbergen, May 2, 1993, page 4

4e Kathy’s letter to Hoksbergen, May 2, 1993, page 5

4f Kathy’s letter to Hoksbergen, May 2, 1993, page 6

4g Kathy’s letter to Hoksbergen, May 2, 1993, page 7

5a Shipping receipts, July 17, 1993 – $52.75 and August 7, 1993 – $45.95

5b Shipping receipt November 23, 1993 – $52.25

emails from Willem Koops, former colleague of (retired) Professor Rene Hoksbergen (palsie-walsie of Joan Wheeler) May 16, 2011

Posted by Ruth in Announcements and updates.
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UPDATE…NOV 2015…

Joan M Wheeler has published a new ‘revision’ of the same old hate manifesto and renamed it ‘Duped by Adoption’. I have created a new blog and Facebook page…

Here are the links to my NEW blog and Facebook page

https://gertmcqueen2.wordpress.com

https://www.facebook.com/dupedbyadoption1

On Amazon, I have reviewed 7 reviews of this ‘new’ garbage book and created a ‘discussion’ on the Forward, by Rene Hoksbergen.

Here’s the link to the DISCUSSION about the FORWARD on Amazon

http://www.amazon.com/about-the-FORWARD-/forum/Fx16ZHWP5PQHHCK/Tx2ACMKSGGGG4SV/1/ref=cm_cd_dp_tp_cq?_encoding=UTF8&asin=B00X520CGW&cdSort=oldest#Mx16G15LCZTNM4X

Here’s the link to a recent blog post Nov 3, 2015 about the contents of the forward

https://gertmcqueen2.wordpress.com/2015/11/03/doesnt-rene-hoksbergen-have-anything-better-to-do-in-his-retirement-than-to-continue-to-use-joan-m-wheelers-families-as-whipping-posts-in-a-new-forward/

Here are the related links to blog posts that Ruth and I have already written and addressed topics related to Rene Hoksbergen, the author of the Forward.

https://gertmcqueen.wordpress.com/2011/12/23/was-rene-hoksbergen-ever-really-a-friend-to-joan-wheeler-or-did-she-just-use-him-like-she-does-everyone/

https://ruthsippelpace.wordpress.com/2011/12/27/gert-mcqueens-review-of-rene-hoksbergens-review-of-forbidden-family-by-joan-wheeler/     this one is about the review in LAVAContact2  2010 English translation

https://ruthsippelpace.wordpress.com/2011/12/26/reposting-from-gert-mcqueens-blog-was-rene-hoksbergen-ever-really-a-friend-to-joan-wheeler-or-did-she-just-use-him-like-she-does-everyone-originally-published-on-december-23-2011/

https://ruthsippelpace.wordpress.com/2011/05/16/emails-from-willem-koops-former-colleague-of-retired-professor-rene-hoksbergen-palsie-walsie-of-joan-wheeler/

https://ruthsippelpace.wordpress.com/2010/09/20/joan-wheeler-lies-about-dr-rene-hoksbergen-in-her-book-forbidden-family/

https://ruthsippelpace.wordpress.com/2010/10/14/

NOW TO CONTINUE WITH THIS POST….

from Gert McQueen to Ruth Pace, via email:
 
for some reason the prof sent me another email…maybe he didn’t remember he sent me an answer on Saturday…doesn’t matter…put this on the blog
—– Forwarded Message —-
From: “Koops, W. (Willem)” <W.Koops@uu.nl>
To: Gert McQueen
Sent: Mon, May 16, 2011 9:04:42 AM
Subject: Re: about the book Forbidden Family
Dear Gert, congratulations! Indeed I agree with you that this was not Dr Hoksbergen as I would like to see him: a careful scientist. Be sure that I will have conversations with dr Hoksbergen on this issue. But again, since he has been retired, he is not strictly obliged to follow my suggestions. 

Again thank you for informing me. All the best to you and your family, Willem KoopsSent from my iPhone

from Ruth:

I thank Professor Koops for his kind email here. To see his email from Saturday, May 14, click on this link:  Our Second Success in recovering our lives from the many lies told by Joan M. Wheeler in her trashy book Forbidden Family – college professors are now agreeing with us!

a note to any international readers of this blog, who may not understand American slang – the term PALSIE-WALSIE, is a sarcastic rendering of “good friend.” the word “pal” is slang for friend, as in buddy, chum, bro.

The Secret is Out – An examination of Joan Wheeler’s failure to protect her birth sister’s identities in her book Forbidden Family May 15, 2011

Posted by Ruth in Black and White Evidence of Joan Wheeler's Lies: Letters, Court Documents, Contradictions of Joan Wheeler, Joan Wheeler's abuse and harassment of her birth family, Lies in the book Forbidden Family, Refuting Joan Wheelers statements.
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Joan Wheeler likes to point out that she changed my name in her book Forbidden Family, thereby “protecting” my identity. What nonsense. Just because she changed my name to “Brenda” doesn’t mean she protected me at all. She claims that we identified ourselves on our blog AFTER the book was published, thereby relieving her of the duty of “protecting” us.

SEE END OF POST FOR UPDATE INFO

    This is an excerpt from a recent blog post by Gert McQueen:

And here are more lies. It was Joan herself that made public our real identities, not once but several times. On Pg 634, footnote #15 of Forbidden Family she references her article The Secret is Out, written and published in 1990 where Joan published our full real names. We objected to that then and as Joan tells it, we harassed her. No! If she was not ‘outing’ the identities of us in the book Forbidden Family then WHY did she put in the reference to an article that identifies us and where anyone could find that information?

So what is this article “The Secret is Out?” It is a short article that Joan wrote in the late 1980’s. It was published in October 1990 in the UK in the “Quarterly Journal of British Agencies for Adoption and Fostering,” pages 22-27. It was also published in 1991 in The Netherlands in the book “Kind van Andere Ouders (Child of Other Parents),” edited by Professor Rene Hoksbergen (yes, Joan’s good palsie-walsie) and Has Walenkamp, Chapter 10, pages 155-163.

In its original publicized version, Joan identifies herself as Joan Wheeler, being born as Doris Michol SIPPEL (my maiden name). She also mentions the HERR family (my mother’s maiden name). She changed Gert’s name to Gillian, but left my name, my sister Kathy’s name, and our brother’s family nickname of Butch, INTACT. These are all on page 23 of the British publication, and page 155 of the Dutch publication. In addition, she identifies Kathy again on page 26 of the British publication and page 161 of the Dutch publication AND identifies the city of Kathy’s residence of Liverpool England.

She changed Gert’s name because Gert had already threatened her with a lawyer, and although in 1989 – 1990, Kathy and I were becoming embroiled in our own conflicts with Joan, we hadn’t yet reached the point of bringing in solicitors and attorneys. HOWEVER, Joan did not ask Kathy or me if she could publish our names, or our cities of residence. We did not even know that this article was being written until it came out and Joan sent us each photocopies of it. I was too busy to do any kind of complaint about it, but Kathy sent a letter to Barbara Fletcher, editor of the British publication.

On Joan’s website, she posts scans of both the British and the Dutch versions of her article. With the British article, our names are blacked out, and in the Dutch version, our names are whited out. In both versions, the cities of residence of both Kathy and me are still intact, as well as our maiden name of Sippel and our mother’s maiden name of Herr.

So what does this mean? This means that 21 years ago, Joan invaded our privacy by PUBLISHING OUR TRUE NAMES WITHOUT OUR CONSENT OR KNOWLEDGE! By blacking/whiting out our names on her website, shows she is covering her ass! And does she think people are stupid? You can clearly see that SOMEBODY’S name was PRINTED AND PUBLICIZED and she merely blacked out and whited out their names. The damage had been done when the article was first printed! Covering her tracks 20 years later just shows everyone that she is backtracking and scrambling to save her lying face. And as Gert pointed out, she refers readers of her book to this article – where our names are published! Changing a person’s name in the body of the book, then referring the readers of the book to an article that has the person’s true name in it, IS NOT PROTECTING THE IDENTITY OF THE PERSON.

Below are several graphics. Secret numbers 1 to 6 are the original published British article with our names and cities of residence intact. Secret number 7 is an establishing shot of Joan Wheeler’s Forbidden Family website. Secret number 8 is the British page with our names blacked out. Secret 10 is the British page with Kathy’s name blacked out, but with her city of residence still visible. Secret 13 is the portion of the page of the Dutch version, with our names whited out. Secret 14 is the Dutch version with Kathy’s name whited out, but the city of her residence is still visible. graphics Secrets 9, 11, and 12 were not needed for this post.

Now, members of the jury – examine the evidence. Can you convict Joan Wheeler, beyond a REASONABLE DOUBT that she invaded our privacy in 1990 and 1991, by publicizing our names without our knowledge or consent? Can you convict Joan Wheeler beyond a REASONABLE DOUBT that she failed to protect our identities by referring to this article in her book Forbidden Family?

Yes, the secret is indeed out – that Joan Wheeler is a liar, and she did NOT protect our identities in her book, and she was the one who identified her birth sisters first – way back in 1990! The glove fits. And if the glove fits, you can NOT acquit.

And by the way, my posting of these documents in no way violates any copyright that Joan Wheeler has for her article “The Secret is Out.” The article contains MY name, and the only person who owns the right to that name is ME. I do not claim any ownsership to this article, only my name. Indeed, the person responsible for writing such nonsense AND violating other people’s privacy is of course none other than Joan M. Wheeler. Who in the world would want to try to claim ownership of material that disrespects other human beings. It sure ain’t my work – I’m only reclaiming MY good name and reputation that Joan Wheeler has been trying to sully by dragging it through the mud. Those days are over!

Joan Wheeler has slapped MY name on her website and on her cyberbulling page. I claim the right to discuss MY name in any manner I see fit. I also claim the right to discuss MY life in any manner I see fit. Joan does not have any right to MY name or MY life. Least of all to try to make money about MY life. Need money Joan? Then get off your butt and get a job. You don’t use MY back to support you. Get yourself your own life and write about it – but keep MY life and MY family’s lives OUT of it – You ceased to be a Sippel in 1956. We tried to reunite with you, but by the 1980’s you got yourself THROWN out. That’s the real secret – Joan lost her birth family twice – once through adoption, through no fault of hers. The second time through banishment – through EVERY fault of her own actions and words.

The Secret is Out original page 1

The Secret is Out original page 2

The Secret is Out original page 3

The Secret is Out original page 4

The Secret is Out original page 5

The Secret is Out original page 6

Secret 7 – establishing shot of Joan Wheeler’s Forbidden Family website.

Secret 8 – British page with our names blacked out.

Secret 10 – British page with Kathy’s name blacked out, but with her city of residence still visible.

Secret 13 – portion of the page of the Dutch version, with our names whited out.

Secret 14 – the Dutch version with Kathy’s name whited out, but the city of her residence is still visible

UPDATE, Sept 2016, as older posts are being seen I’m updating with links to my second blog and a Facebook page wherein I expose AGAIN the lies, fabrications and hate that Joan M Wheeler says about me and family. After the first book was pulled from publication by the publisher, May 2011, she has ‘self-published’ another ‘revised’ version. In this ‘version’ called ‘duped by adoption’ she has increased her exploitation by including PICTURES and REAL NAMES and much more personal information violating again the families. Joan has no decency NOR shame. There is NOTHING in this book for adoption reform. She is totally against adoption and her two families. To learn more see…

 https://gertmcqueen2.wordpress.com/

 https://www.facebook.com/dupedbyadoption1

Like this:

Nicole Urdang’s amazon.com review of Joan Wheeler’s trash book Forbidden Family, and Ruth Pace’s rebuttal (re-post) May 15, 2011

Posted by Ruth in Announcements and updates, Joan Wheeler's abuse and harassment of her birth family, Refuting Joan Wheelers statements.
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In recent posts, we indicated that a Buffalo, NY therapist, Nicole S. Urdang, who wrote a review on Amazon.com for Joan’s book removed her review. We were in error. The review is still there, but hidden. But I found it.

Ms. Urdang writes:
This is an incredible book. Two books actually. One a memoir and one a call to arms for all adoptees.

Joan chronicles her own deeply moving experience and uses that as a springboard to examine wider issues affecting all adoptees and their parents.

An essential addition to your library if you are involved with adoption either personally or professionally.

 I left this comment:

Ruth Pace says:

This book has been pulled from publication due to an incredible amount of slander and libel, and the author’s use of a family photo on the back cover, that she has NO copyrights to. She never bothered to obtain written permission from those whose likeness she is trying to make money off.
The book is of no help to anyone who has any adoption anxiety concerns, except that it is a chronicle of a woman losing her mind. the author details her alcoholism, anti-social behavior, rages, descent into depression. maybe it could help propel someone into therapy, but the author herself, despite admitting to being in therapy for years, has never learned any life lessons, continuing to blame all her woes on everybody else.

 Now, going back to Ms. Urdang’s review – she says that this book is a “call to arms for all adoptees.” Why? Because Joan herself is mentally ill? Because Joan herself cannot accept reality? The reality being that in 1956 when my mother died, things were NOT as they are today – there were no daycare centers – my father had to go to work – he had no siblings – his parents were elderly and could not provide care for an infant – my mother’s siblings all had large families themselves, MY FATHER HAD NO CHOICE – HE WAS NOT COERCED INTO GIVING JOAN TO ADOPTION! Would Joan have wanted to lie in a crib unattended all day while my father was at his job? Or should he have stayed home and earned no money, and therefore we would all ended up in the streets. There was no welfare system as we have today.

 These are the facts of Joan’s early life – it is her REFUSAL to accept them is what is causing her the great pain and frustration of her adoption.

 In her book she twists the facts around – my mother’s sister did indeed know who adopted Joan and where she was living. She did NOT tell us about her. But when we became adults, we did ask her, and she only told us the name: Joan Wheeler. When I was 20 years old, I placed phone calls to Wheelers listed in the phone book. When I got to Edward, a young woman answered, and when I heard her speak, she sounded exactly like my other sister. I was not drunk when I made this call, as Joan writes in her book.

 Two years later, 1974, we called her and were reunited with her. But by 1981, Joan began interfering with our lives, calling child abuse on one sister, stealing bead trim off the wedding dress of another sister, (and the dress was originally my mother’s)  lying, manipulating people to create strife and tension and fighting between family members. By 1990, she stole hundreds of dollars from me, in 1993, she filed false police reports on me, in 1994-95, she called my employer repeatedly to get me fired, she wrote letters to elected officials giving out personal details of my life, in 1999, she sent me a letter telling me my husband got the next-door neighbor pregnant, and much, much more.

 These actions, that caused me and my family much pain and grief did cause us to turn our backs on her. Would you want to associate with someone who files false police reports on you and calls your job to get you fired?

Perhaps Joan does have a beef against the adoption system because she feels that her adoptive parents “lied” to her. THAT IS NOT MY CONCERN! Just because they lied to her, does NOT give her the right to do all those things to us, her biological kin. Obviously the people who adopted and raised her did not instill a proper value system in her. Again,THAT IS NOT MY CONCERN, as long as Joan’s value system does not cause me and mine any harm. The problem is, it has. Big time.

 Because of Joan Wheeler’s actions she was banished from our family. She will not accept this. She will not accept the consequences of her own actions. She cannot get it through her head that because of the many times she has HURT us, we don’t want her around us. It is her refusal to get these things through her head that is causing her pain. And at this point, I don’t give a damn as to whatever “trauma” she has gone through in her life. I am dealing with the trauma that Joan has caused ME.  And to see this lie-filled book, to open this book, to read on these pages, LIES about myself, is HURTFUL.

 A call to arms? Why? So these “damaged” individuals can turn around and do damage to other people? NO WAY!

 So now this lying book has been pulled off the market, good riddance I say.

 And I add this small comment to Ms. Urdang, indeed to EVERYbody who knows Joan Wheeler, whether personally in Buffalo, or on the internet: TELL HER TO STAY AWAY FROM ME AND MY FAMILY AND STOP WRITING LIES ABOUT US.

 Joan got slapped down and slapped down real hard with the pulling of her precious book from publication. And that’s the consequences of her actions. That’s life Joan, DEAL WITH IT. TAKE YOUR PSYCHOSES AWAY FROM US AND LEAVE US ALONE!

My letter (Jan 18, 2011) to Nicole S. Urdang, therapist, who thought the trash book Forbidden Family by Joan Wheeler was a good book, but then pulled her review of it off amazon dot com. May 15, 2011

Posted by Ruth in Announcements and updates, Joan Wheeler's abuse and harassment of her birth family, Refuting Joan Wheelers statements.
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note – May 15, 2016 – Joan Wheeler has moved her blog at least 3 times since my writing this letter and this blog post. Her newest version of her blog does not have her blog post, “angry adoptee rant” – archives of December 2009: https://forbiddenfamily.com/2009/12/page/2/ — because Joan Wheeler is a sneak, a liar, and a backtracker. When her lies are uncovered, she hastily removes traces of her lies. With no apologies or explanations.

June 15, 2011, 6:00 am

to the members of redandwhitekop,who found this blog: welcome. I tried to register at your forum, but can’t get my Outlook Express to work.  (gulleysucker – you are too funny! love ya!)

Oh yes, I have a very low opinion of Nicole S. Urdang as this blog post will attest. She not only wrote a stupid review on amazon on my sister’s self-published book of hate and rage against me and others, she even reviewed graham crackers!  – so her nickname for her looooooong poetry is chocolatepsych? – I will admit to dabbling a bit in some New Age problem solutions, but geez, ya gotta keep it in perspective! And anyone who reviews crackers and calls themselves chocolatepsych just doesn’t seem qualified to me. She says Fridays are reserved for emergencys. mmmm. by all means – have your chum ring her up about his broken toilet seat – but make sure it’s on Friday – a broken toilet seat can be serious. 

My other sisters and I call her a “ditz” – check out her website and see what I mean! I just want to put her picture up on a dartboard! roflmao! I just can’t see getting therapy from a ditz like this. I don’t think I could keep a straight face!

But seriously – I don’t want to be labeled as an “enemy” of the ditz – just someone who strongly opposses her and her support of my wacko sister. – Because the ditz is as wacky as my sister. Talk about the blind leading the blind! — Ruth

This is a letter I sent to Nicole S. Urdang, a Buffalo, NY therapist, who posted a review of the trash book Forbbiden Family, on amazon dot com. In it she says this book was good. I question this woman’s ability to be a therapist, because obviously she can’t see the book is from a deranged mind. Also, I wonder just what her relationship to Joan is – if she is Joan’s therapist – then she stepped over the bounds of professionalism. If she is not, and merely a friend, she needs to be a better friend to Joan and urge her to get on some psych meds. Please DEEPLY READ this letter, examine it – see if there is any reference to Joan Wheeler being an asshole – because I NEVER wrote to any professional person or agency and called Joan an asshole. And neither have my sisters.

Ms. Urdang never had the courage to respond to this letter, which I mailed via the US Postal Service. Gert also contacted her via email. Ms. Urdang never responded to Gert either.  Says a lot about her character – AND – she removed her review of the Trash Book from amazon dot com. mmmm, makes one wonder.

January 18, 2011

 Nicole S. Urdang

 Buffalo, New York 142

 My name is Ruth Sippel Pace. I am the birth sister of Joan Wheeler, author of the book Forbidden Family, of which you wrote a review of and placed on Amazon.com.  I cannot believe any person of your occupation could think a book like that is anything but garbage.

 I don’t know how you are acquainted with Joan Wheeler, and I really don’t care. Whether you are involved with her on a personal note or a professional note, you need to be aware of Joan’s actions towards her entire family. Her behavior is psychotic, anti-social and borders on criminal, indeed, she HAS crossed the line and HAS committed criminal acts. They are not enough for law enforcement to act on, but as we have seen time after time, these people keep on with their sick behaviors until we have an incident comparable to what happened in Tucson, Arizona on January 8, 2011. In 1998, Joan Wheeler was asking around for a “hitman” to “take her (me) out.” Because of this death threat, I took her to Family Court and was granted a one-year order of protection against her. Now Joan has hooked up with someone, and I am concerned. Joan also has posted on her website hate statements against me and my sisters. These statements are also indicative of coming from a psychotic mind and are a cause of concern.

 Joan in the past has tried to ruin my life. Due to an innocent typing mistake, her hospital bill got mixed up with another patient’s bill in 1994. Joan immediately accused me of hacking into my employer’s computer to tamper with her bill. She sent a complaint to my employer. They investigated it, and told Joan that not only did they trace it to a typing mistake, but that it was impossible for me to do it, as the computers on the nursing station are not connected to the billing computers. Joan wasn’t going to have it. For the next six months, almost every day, she placed calls to the hospital telling everyone that I was a thief, a computer hacker, and should be fired. I work the 11pm – 7am shift, and was never told about this. I found out about it six months later. When I questioned a secretary in the nursing office, I was told that there had been a meeting by hospital administration that they were to hang up when Joan called and not to tell me. Yes, Buffalo General Hospital Administration protected me. Joan then tried to break my husband and me up by sending me a letter telling me that he got the next door neighbor pregnant. And they had a daughter. The only two babies born to women in that house from 1987 (when we moved there) – 2005 (when it was torn down), were boys. And Joan did much much more to me. I did try to take her to court for harassment in 1995, but the judge dismissed it, saying sisters should get along.” Would that that statement could be true. In Joan’s garbage book, she completely turns the story around, saying that it was she who took me to court and describes scenes that could only come from a sick person’s deluded fantasies.

 Your review of her book Forbidden Family is in itself a work of garbage. You are a professional therapist and do not see within the pages of that book a chronicle of a person losing their mind? Did you not even catch contradictions from one page to another, indeed even in one sentence?

 Even on her website she is full of contradictory statements and behaviors. For example on this page: http://forbiddenfamily.net/2009/12/10/angry-adoptee-rant1/, she gives out our full names. And later down the page, she says she doesn’t want us to view her website. Her website is supposed to be adoption reform, yet she has the hate statement against us. And does not see that if she puts our names there, we then have the right to see what is written about us.
note – May 15, 2016 – Joan Wheeler has moved her blog at least 3 times since my writing this letter and this blog post. Her newest version of her blog does not have her blog post, “angry adoptee rant” – archives of December 2009: https://forbiddenfamily.com/2009/12/page/2/ — because Joan Wheeler is a sneak, a liar, and a backtracker.

 My sisters and I have started a blog called Refuting a Book of Lies: Forbidden Family  https://ruthsippelpace.wordpress.com/    I invite you to read it. It is not pretty. But Joan’s book is not pretty. How can someone write such garbage? And you, a professional, think this book is good? What is your professional opinion of what she says on page 163 about the condition of my mother’s body at the moment of her death? Joan claims that my father related this disgusting scene to her. This is a post I had made on my blog in October 2010:

 Ruth’s note, May 14, 2011 – Here, I had copied and pasted a post from this blog in this letter I sent to Ms. Urdang. To save space, I removed it, but it is the post Ruth Pace’s additional comments of Personal Psychodrama of Joan Wheeler from October 14, 2010.

 Also again and again in the book Joan alleges that I, Ruth Pace have a criminal record, having been arrested and placed on probation. This is slander and libel. I have never been arrested in my life. Joan is alluding to the 1993 event wherein she filed a complaint against me for annoyance phone calls made in June 1993, and she received a six-month order of protection against me, the dates being from August 9, 1993 to February 9, 1994. In the book she says she signed the complaint in February 1993, and the Order of Protection was for one year, and I was also sentenced to probation. On my blog, I have provided the scanned copies of actual court documents that have Joan signing the complaint on July 19, 1993, and that I was NOT placed on probation. 

 As a professional, before you put your name to recommending a product or a book, you are responsible for doing research to see if that product or book is the “genuine article.” Since you did not ask me for verification of statements that Joan put forth about me in the book, you obviously do not care about the truth. And as you are a “professional” therapist, the truth should be your primary concern.

 On January 11, 2011, my father died and Joan and her new companion were involved in the desecration of my father’s guest book in the funeral home. I invite you to read the following 3 blog posts that have been posted for legal and personal reasons:

 Ruth’s note, May 14, 2011 – Here  I had copied and pasted 3 posts from this blog in this letter I sent to Ms. Urdang.  To save space, I removed it, but they are  the posts: THIS IS A FORMAL NOTICE FOR LEGAL PURPOSES AGAINST JOAN M. WHEELER AND RUSSELL D. THOMAS OF WILSON NY (he made himself public by signing this on a separate page in the guest book; posted January 16, 2011.    Legal Notice to Joan M. Wheeler – Part 2; posted January 17, 2011. and Legal Notice to Joan M. Wheeler Part 3 by Gertrude McQueen, first born of Leonard Sippel; also posted on January 17, 2011. 

 Now, Ms. Urdang, I will give some background information. This story was told to us many times through the years, and was also confirmed in March 2010 by my mother’s last surviving sibling, Richard L. Herr, currently living in Florida.

When my mother was diagnosed with the cancer in January 1956, her brothers had suggested to my father that she be seen by a cancer specialist at Roswell Park. My father hesitated, saying that he wasn’t sure if he could pay for it. The brothers offered to pay. My mother herself, refused the consultation from a specialist. She then died on March 28, 1956. Her brothers, in their grief, blamed my father for her death. However they felt about my father, they never, nor did their children, disrespect me or my siblings. My cousins, descendants of these five men, through the years, have always proved themselves to always have been respectful to my father, always referring to him as Uncle Leonard, and greeting him warmly when seeing him at other funerals, and at family reunions.

 The hate message that was boldly printed in my father’s guest book was this:

“May he rot in hell for all eternity. From the Herrs: Charles, Matthew, Michael, Henry, Richard.”

 These men are all dead, except for Richard, who is in Florida, in fact, he was on the phone with my sister Kathy, being physically in Florida when the forgery of his name was taking place.

 If you, Ms. Urdang, are Joan Wheeler’s professional therapist, first and foremost, you overstepped your professional bounds by writing a personal recommendation of a book written by one of your clients. If you are her professional therapist, you are doing a poor job in counseling her. If you are involved with Joan in a merely personal level, as a friend, then you are doing a poor job as a friend. Because a friend would not let one carry on the way Joan does. A friend, or a professional therapist would try to make Joan understand the simple rule of “cause and effect.” When Joan tells a lie about a person, there can and will be repercussions.

 If there are any further criminal acts committed by Joan, I will hold you partially responsible.

 Respectfully submitted,

 Ruth B. Pace

Blog postings of recent correspondences by Gert McQueen and Ruth Pace to several individuals to refute lies told by Joan M. Wheeler in her book Forbidden Family May 14, 2011

Posted by Ruth in Announcements and updates, Joan Wheeler's abuse and harassment of her birth family, Refuting Joan Wheelers statements, Statements from The Three Sippel Sisters.
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by Ruth Sippel Pace

Readers of this blog may notice the publication on this blog of correspondences that Gert and myself have had with some individuals. This is being done in the interest of full disclosure of what we have said and to whom. Because Gert and I are not liars.

BUT FIRST AN UPDATE, MAY 2016, as older posts are being seen I’m updating with links to my second blog and a Facebook page wherein I expose AGAIN the lies, fabrications and hate that Joan M Wheeler says about me and family. After the first book was pulled from publication by the publisher, May 2011, she has ‘self-published’ another ‘revised’ version. In this ‘version’ called ‘duped by adoption’ she has increased her exploitation by including PICTURES and REAL NAMES and much more personal information violating again the families. Joan has no decency NOR shame. There is NOTHING in this book for adoption reform. She is totally against adoption and her two families. To learn more see…

https://gertmcqueen2.wordpress.com/

https://www.facebook.com/dupedbyadoption1

We NOW continue with this post….

Contrary to what Joan Wheeler accuses us of we are NOT contacting various adoption reform agencies and professionals and calling her an asshole. Nor have we EVER told her to commit suicide. Not on this blog, not in any form of communication to her, through third-party contact, or even on the internet.

Therefore, we are making public any past correspondences we have sent to ANYone concerning Joan Wheeler and the book Forbidden Family, and their replies, if any. We did this back in September 2010, when we contact Mr. Joe Soll, who replied within a half hour of receiving an email from Gert concerning a 40 page letter that the Three Sippel Sisters supposedly wrote and sent to Joan in 1992, “kicking her out of the family.” Joan tells of this letter in her book. This is a complete fabrication, there was NEVER a 40 page letter written by us and sent to her. Joan expands her lie to say that we also sent copies of this letter to various adoption agencies. She then says in the book that she herself made a copy of it and sent it to Mr. Soll, and then had a phone conversation with him, discussing this letter.

In his return email to Gert, Mr. Soll denies any knowledge of this letter, and further says that what Joan writes about him in her book is “patently false.” – so much for her asserting that she is telling the truth in her book, when Mr. Joe Soll says emphatically that she lied about him.

The only time prior to 2010 that any adoption reform agency was ever contacted was ONCE in 1990, after Joan published a short story called “The Secret is Out” in a European adoption reform journal. In this article, Joan used our real names, without our permission or prior knowledge. ONE and ONLY complaint was ever made, and I believe it was one typewritten page!

Never in any correspondence that we have engaged in, have we EVER called Joan an asshole or any other name. As for her claims that we have urged her to commit suicide, nope – on the contrary, in our correspondences, we have urged those who know Joan to reason with her and to seek professional help! Just as we have done on this blog – we have urged Joan many times on this blog, as we had done in person in the past – to seek professional help and get some medication and to stop her anti-social behaviors.

Joan does not produce any proof that we have written to people and agencies and called her an asshole. The only name she produced was Joe Soll, and he disavowed any knowledge of her claim! She does not produce this “40 page letter” she claims we wrote. She does not copy and paste or give the url link to prove to people that we have urged her to commit suicide. She just runs her mouth, and gives no proof to her charges.

We, on the other hand, DO give the proof – the evidence – of all that we say and do. Whatever we say on any internet forum – we copy and paste what we have written, AND provided the url link to the site so that readers can double check that what we say on this blog, is the TRUTH!

We deal in truth. Joan deals with falsehoods. It’s just as plain and simple as that. 

addendum, May 15, 2011, 1:00pm

I have on file scanned copies of the complaint that was sent protesting the use of our true names in Joan Wheeler’s short story “The Secret is Out.” I shall be composing a blog post detailing this invasion of our privacy by Joan Wheeler in the year 1990, and will post the complaint about said use of our names in publication WITHOUT our knowledge or permission. And there is not ONE reference to Joan as an “asshole.”

In 1992, my sister Kathy Inglis, received a condescending letter from Joan’s friend, Dr. Rene Hoksbergen. this was due to Joan not shipping to England several boxes of personal belongings of Kathy, who had sent Joan money orders to cover the shipping costs. Joan refused to ship the belongings, and involved Dr. Hoksbergen in Kathy’s personal life, by lying to Dr. Hoksbergen that it would cost about $500.00 to ship over the belongings, and Joan did not have the money. (what happened to the money that Kathy sent – Joan used it for her own living expenses, because she was too lazy to get off her butt and get a job). My father eventually got involved, took a cab to Joan’s house to collect Kathy’s belongings and shipped them over to her to the final cost of $150.00. And Joan did NOT return all of the belongings. – missing are valuable Beatles collectibles. My father shipped over vinyl records, which as I said, cost him $150.00. Nowhere near the $500.00 Dr. Hoksbergen was led to believe it would cost.

Kathy wrote a letter to Dr. Hoksbergen, in essence, telling him to mind his own business. And she wrote a letter of complaint to Utrecht University because of his unprofessional manner in sticking his nose into our family business. Gert also sent off a letter to Dr. Hoksbergen, again telling him to mind his own business. And in these three missives, there is no mention of Joan Wheeler of being an asshole. And I have the scanned copies of these letters, and they will be posted to this blog as proof that we may have contacted “adoption reform professionals,” but with good reason, and we never used those letters to call Joan an asshole.

As stated above, we Sippel Sisters deal in the Truth, and provide proof of it with written documentation. Joan deals in falsehoods and offers no proof of anything that comes out of her mouth.

NOTE FROM GERT…May 9, 2016…what is said in this post…long before I had my own computer and internet access and was using Ruth’s blog…is the TRUTH. We don’t have to lie for we did NOT WRITE A BOOK against anyone. We have only ever DEFENDED OUR AND OUR FAMILY’S REPUTATIONS AGAINST THE SICK LIES OF JOAN M WHEELER

Ruth Pace and Gert McQueen continue the battle to regain their good names after having their names dragged through the mud in Joan Wheeler’s book Forbidden Family May 14, 2011

Posted by Ruth in Announcements and updates, Joan Wheeler's abuse and harassment of her birth family, Refuting Joan Wheelers statements.
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 In the interest of full disclosure I, Gert McQueen, want to share my original email I sent to Doc Hoksbergen to which I never received a response. At that I had also written to the University of Utrecht of the Netherlands where Doc R. Hoksbergen worked and received an written answer from  Prof Willem Koops and that is why I emailed him.   

From: Gert Mcqueen
To: r.a.c.hoksbergen@uu.nl
Sent: Mon, January 10, 2011 1:20:39 PM
Subject: your review
Doctor
 Are you aware that your review of Forbidden Family, by Joan Wheeler has been placed on Amazon.com
 It appears as if it was placed there by Joan Wheeler herself. Did she receive permission to place it there, from you, as I thought the only ones that can place reviews to a book is someone who purchased the book.
 
I have received a letter from the University that you are retired from and as they said to me that I ought to accuse the author of the book, Joan Wheeler, and not you who wrote a review. But my position is still the same…you never checked your facts…and now Joan has place YOUR words on a internet book seller’s site, and the words that you said in your review are WRONG and SLANDERISH and now are all over the Internet.
 
Mark my words, Doctor, Joan has lied and if you have any influence with her perhaps you ought to get her to remove the book from the selling market, for our family will NEVER cease telling the truth about that book of lies.
 Gert McQueen
 
****
 When. some months ago, I saw a review on Amazon by Nicole Urdang I did response to her, via a web site and never received an answer. (Ruth’s note: I also contacted her, via snail mail, and she never had the guts to respond). We did report this on this blog some months ago. Then, when we recently noticed that her review was no longer on Amazon I wrote the following at this address:
 
Nicole Urdang, M.S, NCC, DHM, is listed in GoodTherapy.org as a therapist in Buffalo Nicole Urdang, M.S, NCC, DHM. Verified Credentials. Profession(s): Marriage, Couples, or Relationship Counseling; Family Therapy; Group Therapy

 

 12 may 2011

It has been brought to my attention that your review of Forbidden Family by Joan Wheeler is no longer on Amazon. I can only guess that you pulled that yourself and wisely so. That book has been pulled from the selling market by the publisher Trafford because, we, the birth sisters have given enough proof to the publisher that the author grossly lied about us and other situations.
If you have any influence with Joan Wheeler, professionally or personally, I would urge you to get her the help she needs and to encourage her to stop in any further attempts to rewrite any further stories about the birth family, for we shall continue with refuting her.
thank you…Gert McQueen

Our Second Success in recovering our lives from the many lies told by Joan M. Wheeler in her trashy book Forbidden Family – college professors are now agreeing with us! May 14, 2011

Posted by Ruth in Announcements and updates, Joan Wheeler's abuse and harassment of her birth family, Refuting Joan Wheelers statements.
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With many more successes to come!

by Ruth Pace via Gert McQueen – Ruth’s note – Gert tells Dr. Rene Hoksbergen how unprofessional he is to have not done research into Joan’s allegations of the actions of her birth family. Apparently, he never read the book before he endorsed it – because Joan has three pages where in 1989, Dr. Hoksbergen come to my house with Joan, and Joan has me screaming at her and him, jumping up and down, flapping my arms around, and Dr. Hoks lecturing me as though I were child. This scene NEVER took place.  DR. RENE HOKSBERGEN NEVER STEPPED FOOT IN MY HOUSE AND HE KNOWS IT! So much for Joan assertations on her website and other places that what is in her book is the absolute truth! And for shame, Dr. Hoksbergen for endorsing such a lying book. You owe me a PUBLIC apology – and you owe Gert a PUBLIC apology for your assistance in damaging her reputation, along with mine, and the rest of our family. I demand it!  — I DEMAND it!

Forwarded Message —-
From: “Koops, W. (Willem)” <W.Koops@uu.nl>
To: Gert McQueen
Sent: Sat, May 14, 2011 6:48:17 AM
Subject: Re: about the book Forbidden Family

Dear Gert, thank you for informing me. I congratulate you with your apparently succesfull actions with respect to this book. I agree of course with your recommendations. Any scientist of my Department will agree with you. Again: a retired professor is beyond my control. Conversations with such a person take place, of course, but are personal and therefore confidential. 

I trust that you will eventually be happy with your own wisdom. 
Kind regards, Willem Koops  
Sent from my iPhone
On 13 mei 2011, at 19:46, “Gert McQueen” <> wrote:Prof dr W Koops
I had written to you several months ago regarding Doctor Hoksbergen. I received a return letter from you in Nov 2010 informing me that Doctor Hoksbergen retired and that you could not help me in my complaint to him about his support and reviews of the book Forbidden Family by Joan Wheeler.
 
While I accept that you are not responsible for his writings, since he retired, I still feel it worthwhile to inform you of recent developments regarding that book and it’s author, since you ‘invited’ me to ‘concentrate’ on the author and not on ‘others who may be convinced the book is about reality’. I had indeed been concentrating on the author at the same time I was concentrating on Doctor Hoksbergen! I thought you would like to know that indeed that book is NOT based on reality. And Doctor Hoksbergen should have, at the very least, contacted family members to verify the many outrageous claims that the author, whom he supported, was writing about.
 
In recent months, I and other family members, subjects of the book, provided enough documented proof to the publisher, Trafford Publications, and after their investigations they have pulled the book from their selling market. They will not print any more copies of it, in its present form, and any further rewrites submitted to them, will be looked at very carefully.
 
May I suggest that in the future you and those that you are responsible for, use more ‘fact finding’ means when assuming the truthfulness of any written theory, as Joan Wheeler presented in her book. The damage that has been caused to my family and I dare say the author could have been avoided if Doctor Hoksbergen had use just a little professionalism before he endorsed a manuscript that was full of lies, gross misrepresentations and hate.
 
I am enclosing a copy of my email to Doctor Hoksbergen for your information.
Thank you,
 
Gert McQueen
 
copy of what was email to:
Doctor Hoksbergen
 
I want to inform you about the recent development regarding the book Forbidden Family by Joan Wheeler. 
 
In recent months I, and another sister, have informed the publisher, Trafford Publications, of the many errors, outright lies, slanderous and libelous statements and other various forms of hate speech in the book. We provided documented proof of those assertions. We asked them to review it and pull it from publication.
 
That is what has recently happen. Trafford Publications pulled the book, will not print any more copies of the book, as it is, and any rewrite that Joan Wheeler submits, will be very very carefully looked at.
 
It is unfortunate that such a book, as written by Joan, was used to promote adoption reform. I’m sure that she will continue with the belief that it is an accurate account and valuable for her causes and agendas; that  view is strictly untrue and it and that book will not help the true cause of adoption reform.
 
This note is just to inform you of the dispension of birth family’s quest to have a book of lies and hate, that Joan wrote, was indeed removed from publication.
 
I have informed you in the past that Joan has placed your review of the book on Amazon. You may want to contact her and have her remove it and distance yourself from it and her. Over time there will no longer be any physical books available to be sold on Amazon but it certainly doesn’t appear seemly for a Doctor of your reputation to have a book review on the internet for a book that has been pulled by the publisher!
 
Furthermore, I seriously wonder how you could have allowed yourself to be conned and dupped by Joan Wheeler for years! Believing all that crap that she told you about our family and you never laid eyes on us! You really ought to be ashamed of yourself for the harm you have contributed to my family and the many many adoptees who have read your review and endorsement of such a fifthy lying hateful book. But hey, that’s your business…my family took care of our business…we had the book of lies pulled from publication.
 
Gert McQueen

Ruth Sippel Pace’s reaction to the pulling of the book Forbidden Family by liar Joan Wheeler May 11, 2011

Posted by Ruth in Announcements and updates, Joan Wheeler's abuse and harassment of her birth family, Refuting Joan Wheelers statements, Uncategorized.
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You are where you are today as a result of every decision you have ever made. Joan makes the decisions to do harm to people, to lie about them. The result? She is an outcast. too bad.

It is with great relief and joy that I announce that this filthy book has been pulled. However, I am not so naive that I think Joan Wheeler is going to shut up and stop spreading lies and filth about her birth sisters, her birth family and her adopted family. I have dealt with her lies for 30 years! I know this snake too well.

I wanted to make an in-depth post going over key points from Gert’s last post of May 10, Joan Wheeler’s book Forbidden Family has been pulled from publication part 2 – Joan thanks her birth sisters for exposing her lies.  – but I don’t have the time right now. I DO have a life you know, and other committments – but I shall be getting my post up next week.

In the meantime, I want to share a few things. I work the night shift at a local hospital and was asleep much of the day Sunday, May 8 – Mother’s Day. A few days before – facebook members were posting pictures of themselves and their mothers to mark the day. I have no picture of me and my mother holding me. So I put up a picture of my mother holding Gert. Mama is looking into the camera, which gives the illusion of her looking into the eyes of the person looking at the photo.

Most of my life I hadn’t bothered with Mother’s Day – I haven’t had a mother since I was 3 years old – who was I going to buy cards and flowers for? (not that I hadn’t honored women who were mother-figures in my life). I also never gave birth to a child – my only pregnancy resulted in the miscarriage of my son. Therefore, who was there ever to hand-make Mother’s Day cards in school for me? Yes, I have been honored through the years with cards and love from Gert’s children, who I was/am very close to. I also consider myself  to be “mom” to my furbabies, for if I am not, who is? I hunt at the supermarket and bring home the prey (catfood) for my cub.

Well, Sunday night at work, I was having some tummy problems. It started aroud 1 am, and I thought if I rested on my break, I’d be okay. No, it continued. So I went home around 4 am. And went to sleep at 4:30am, waking up at 10:00 am. An hour later, the phone rang. It was from the publisher with the good news that the book was being pulled.  If my tummy hadn’t been upset, I would have worked all the way to 7 am, and be still sleeping at 11 am, and I would have missed the call.

Later that day, I was on facebook, and glanced at Mama’s picture. A feeling came over me – I felt Mama’s eyes on me – and she was saying to me “well done my daughter.” For this victory is not just to vindicate the Three Sippel Sisters – but to vindicate her as well. Because in her book, Joan drags both my mother and father throug the mud.  She has a whole disgusting paragraph describing my mother’s death – supposedly told to her by my father – and reports that my mother’s sides split open and her insides all came spilling out. – I discussed that in my post of October 14, 2010: Ruth Pace’s additional comments of Personal Psychodrama of Joan Wheeler

  So this lurid and disgusting scene was JOAN’S adoption experience? How so? And how does it promote adoption reform? If those were the reasons for Joan writing her book, well, that pararaph does not belong in the book. As a matter of fact, only a disgusting low-life would write such utter degrading disgusting things. Even the US government decided NOT to show photos of the dead body of Osama bin Laden, because it was deemed too disturbing to see – even though the American people are jubilant that he is dead. But Joan in her disgusting manner, goes beyond human decency – and writes that garbage about my mother.

Further, Joan writes that my father was so poor that he was going to bury my mother in the nude. She got this crap from her adoptive mother, who drummed into Joan’s head all her life that her birth family was poor, and that for Christmas 1956, she and her husband sent over a tree and presents for us kids. What utter garbage! My father worked at Buffalo City Hall, and made a decent living. Do you think that because his stay-at-home-and-unemployed wife died that suddenly we Sippels had no money? But my father remarried in 1956 – and she came from a large Italian family – our newly blended Sippel-Genovese family with kids all over the place, doting grandparents/stepgrandparents, aunts + uncles, step-aunts + uncle, certainly had many many fine Christmases. We didn’t need the help of Joan’s adoptive parents to provide us with Christmas. And if we did, I doubt that my stepmother would have even considered marrying him – she had two sons to provide for – and when she died 10 years later, her will specifically named MY father to continue raising her youngest because “he was always a better father to him than his real one.” I totally remember this – because one day in our teen years, my stepbrother and I read it together and hugged each other. (a rarity for him, because his nature was usually aloof).

This statement and others all over the book about my father being uneducated (he was not) and poor (he was not) and unable to afford to provide for his family is a DISHONOR to my father, my mother’s beloved and father of her children.

Also in the book, Joan attacks and lies about my cousin Gail. She harrassed Gail while she was battling cancer. And had harrassment charges placed against her for it. She puts Gail down in the book, yet she showed up at Gail’s funeral in 2003. Why was she there? She had no business being at Gail’s funeral. And Joan attacked and harrassed one of Gail’s nephews – she doesn’t write about it in the book – but yes, Joan didn’t  just cause trouble for and intefere with the lives of her birth sisters – but everyone around her! And there is no past tense either – she is still doing it!

I live only about 2 miles from the cemetaries where Mama and Gail are buried. I don’t go there often. I don’t like going to Gail’s at all. I can’t believe she is not with us. 8 years later – I can’t bear it.  Oh the times we walked home from bowling and had to cross that bridge – it swayed with the traffic and scared us – so to keep our minds off it – we sang at the tops of our lungs all the way across the bridge.

On Tuesday, May 10, I went to the cemetary. I cut some tulips and daffodils from my front garden. It was a beautiful sunny spring day. I placed 3 tulips on Mama’s headstone – one each from me, Gert and Kathy. One daffodil from our deceased brother, and the other two for love. I felt a great peace – I could feel Mama’s presence, thanking me.

I then went to Gail’s grave and placed flowers there too. I told her that I did it. I got that lying book pulled – the book that had lies in it about her. Through my tears, I sang our favorite song:

“Great big globs of greasy grimy gopher guts, mutiliated monkeymeat, little birdie’s dirty feet. Eyeballs floating in a pan of bloody grease, and I forgot my spoon! Oh darn it!”

This is for you Gail – And it’s for my father – and it’s for my mother – it is not just for us Sippel Sisters, but for our whole family!

I have been authorized to post this comment for my sister Gert McQueen:

Family honor is vital to the continuation of life. Without our parents we would not have a life. Parents are not perfect, but neither are children…it isn’t about perfect…it’s about life ties and honor…honor more than love. If one does not and can not learn to honor one’s parents than they can not and will not honor themselves and if one does not honor themselves they can cause a great deal of pain to those around them.

I want to thank Ruth for making that effort, on her benefit as well as for me, Kathy and Butch on Mother’s Day…Happy Mother’s Day, MOM

Joan Wheeler’s book Forbidden Family has been pulled from publication part 2 – Joan thanks her birth sisters for exposing her lies. May 10, 2011

Posted by Ruth in Announcements and updates, Black and White Evidence of Joan Wheeler's Lies: Letters, Court Documents, Contradictions of Joan Wheeler, Joan Wheeler Speak - how Joan views the world, Joan Wheeler's abuse and harassment of her birth family, Lies in the book Forbidden Family, Refuting Joan Wheelers statements, Statements from The Three Sippel Sisters.
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by Gert McQueen
 
On Joan Wheeler’s web site for Forbidden Family she wrote a Thank You on May 6, 2011. In her usual way of hiding new attacks upon blood family she placed it under a new ‘tab’ on the site…she believes herself to be clever.  

 She wrote this mocking thank you in response to finding out, on May 6, that Trafford Publications, who publishes her book, told her that there were some problems with the book, they were pulling the book, but she did have the ‘option’ of a rewrite. Besides Joan’s general stupidity two other things are very obvious with this ‘thank you’ of Joan’s.

 Number one, Joan really doesn’t have a CLUE as to what she was told about her book…that it was PULLED, that it will NOT be printed AGAIN, until or unless, there is a REWRITE. That means that after all current physical books are gone there will NOT BE ANY MORE PRINTED. Any inquiry to purchase the book, be it bookseller or individual, must go to Trafford to order the book, because they print it, but will find that it is NO LONGER AVAILABLE. How do I know? Because I’ve been talking to Trafford Publications for over 4 months!

 Number two; she has found herself a writing ‘coach’, for these 4 paragraphs are NOT fully Joan Wheeler’s words. How do I know? Because I have read and know Joan’s writing style and her choice of words, as they are written in her book and on various web sites, and they are not used in this smug ‘thank you’.

 As usual I quote Joan’s word, in italic, and then I answer. I may break up her paragraphs for easier commenting and understandings. 

 Joan said: Adoption is a controversial issue. As with any issue, there are more ways than one to view it. I have written a book which puts forth my personal experiences as an adoptee and while I speak from my own point of view, there are issues which other adoptees may have encountered.

 Gert says: The blood family’s objections are not with any issues of adoption. Any of our personal views and opinions on that ‘controversial’ issue has nothing to do with what we have against and with Joan Wheeler or her book. Joan cannot use and abuse relatives for the sake of telling HER story…without impunity…there are consequences; that is the blood family’s objections not adoption itself. We also object to Joan’s insistence on saying that we, the blood family, have suffered or are suffering because she was adopted! What utter garbage! That thought and belief is strictly a fabrication and figment of Joan’s mind due to her and only her upbringing and has no basis on truth or reality in relationship to the blood family! Joan has lived her life with adoption syndromes and has projected all that crap upon others to promote her agenda. She hasn’t a clue as to what kind of a person I am…why…because she hasn’t had any meaningful contact with me for over 30 years and the two contacts she did have she manipulated to suit her own purposes in the book! 

 So, our issues are with the way Joan Wheeler has portrayed us individually and collectively as a family, with gross dishonor, with the pure intent to magnify and sensationalize a tragic death of a mother and those that were left behind. We totally object to Joan’s ‘views’ of our lives and her attempts to capitalize on us for mere financial gains because she doesn’t work, never has worked and needs a source of income. Not on our backs!

 She says that she has told her experiences as an adoptee…no…she has put forth her ‘point of view’. That point of view is not the reality, from those that have suffered from her, over the years, and continuing on with the publication of this book. We the blood family NEVER gave her any permission to use our lives for her personal crusade against adoption. Our refuting blog’s purpose is to set forth the truth from Joan’s lies and gross misrepresentations. There is no one that will gain any insights to help them with their own struggles of adoption by believing what Joan Wheeler has written about HER PERSONAL EXPERIENCES, for Joan is a mentally ill person! Buyer and reader beware!

 Joan said: I could not have written this book without the assistance, albeit unintentional, of my natural family. As it happened, I was found by siblings I did not know existed. It is due only to that that this book was made possible. The full-blooded sisters who found me have, through blogs which can only be described as hostile, have contributed enormously to bringing Forbidden Family to the attention of those who are interested in the different aspects of adoption and what happens when siblings are separated by adoption. For their assistance in doing so, I thank them.

 Gert says: Yes, indeed the natural family knew nothing about the fact that Joan was planning, for years, on using our lives for a smut filled book directly from her diseased mind where she ‘exposes them all’ (Joan’s words pg 452 of her book). That is why Joan could NEVER follow up with the many attempts, by various blood relatives, at reconciling with her over the years, for to do so, would mean that Joan’s book and her life story, as she knew it, could not be written or published.

 So what did the blood family get for ‘finding’ her? Nothing but pain and grief! And, she can’t even tell the story, here, truthfully! She says ‘the full-blooded sisters who found me have’…what happened to the full-blooded brother who was also there in the finding of her? Forget the fact that he is now dead but, like our father, had suffered at the hands of Joan and who distanced themselves from her years before their deaths. No, Joan only wants to go after the sisters because we are standing in the way of her fantasies, for every time she mentions the blood family we answer her!

 She also is lying here by saying that we have ‘blogs’, there is only one that is refuting her lies! Again, Joan is a liar for it is Joan herself that has two blogs where she very much attacks the blood family. We are hostile? Well depends on which side of the fence you happen to be on! From our side it is Joan who is hostile as in her second blog against us. Joan’s belief that we ‘have contributed enormously to bringing Forbidden Family to the attention of those who are interested in the different aspects of adoption and what happens when siblings are separated by adoption’ is yet another figment of her misguided understanding of how people are viewing her. If Joan is thinking of her fellow adoptees, well then, she is only one of many sick individuals that feed on each other’s sick lives. They are her fellow victims, they are only interested in browbeating the world into seeing their views and they deserve each other. On the other hand, I have seen for myself how sane thinking people view the angry words of people like Joan who is only kidding herself that she is helping her cause.

 What actually happens to siblings separated by adoption? I don’t really know and don’t give a damm. I know what I suffered, by the hands of a sibling that was placed in adoption and then reunited with us! My life before her was great! I was not suffering from lack of knowing her! The 8 years that she was in life… was total hell! My life after I divorced and banished her from my life was doubly great! I did not suffer from lack of her in my life ever! I am only NOW SUFFERING because she wrote a lying book about my life and family and has the gall to rub salt in old wounds that she caused in the first place. No, adoption separation is not the issue; the issue is Joan’s sick interference in the lives of others! Beware!

 Joan said: If you have read their blogs, you will find their views of my book, and of me, and will read their personal accounts of what it means for them to have found their long-lost baby sister. Yes, you will find their bitterness, jealously, resentment, accusations and allegations which they have made. You can then form an idea of the real, concrete issues surrounding adoption, particularly, my adoption and the detrimental effects that separating siblings has on all involved.

 Gert says: Here again, Joan is fantasying, she really believes she is the great savior for those in adoption trauma, what bullshit. I don’t dwell on what ‘it means to have found their long-lost baby sister’ for I know, first hand. Joan has this warp view that because we ‘lost’ her we are ‘damaged’…far from it! Joan has a theory and she has tried to make us fit into her theory, problem is, we don’t buy her theory and neither does anyone else that is sane and/or wants to keep a crazy person away from them. No thank you Joan…I have been very happy in my life since that day in 1981 when I told you to GET LOST. It is only since you published a book of lies in 2009 that I have even a thought of you and now you have my FULL ATTENTION, the attention that YOU WANTED all your life, but never had. Stop projecting your loses onto your sisters, we don’t give a damm about you. What point of Joan’s life are we jealous of? Got me! No thank you! I have my own life, always had my own life, like my own life and am not jealous of anyone. Again, Joan is showing the world her own lack of character!

 Joan said: Without the assistance of my full-blood sisters and their blogs, it is doubtful that Forbidden Family could have achieved the level of publicity it has. I recognize that, as with any controversial issue, there will be those who will take one side without examining the other and those who are willing to allow others to do their thinking for them. These people are not my audience I am speaking to those who have the insight to examine both sides of an issue, and only then draw whatever conclusions they chose.

 Gert says: There is a great deal of difference between publicity and sales. There is also the level in the kind of publicity one gets. Contrary to what Joan believes the publicity, of this book of lies, that has come from us sisters, is exactly what we have intended…to show the world how crazy Joan Wheeler is and how to counter such a individual if one, such as Joan, is in their lives. So, Miss Joan, once again you have misread what actual reality is! And again, Joan is showing us her faulty logic and double-speak to confuse the reader. READ DEEPLY here! She is clever with words…and she believes every word of her own propaganda.

 Joan said: My intention in writing this book was not to attack or impugn anyone, but merely to relate my personal experiences in the hope that it may be of benefit to others. Any discrepancy in names, or dates, are due to me trying to protect the anonymity of those involved (they themselves have gone public with their identities), but the incidents and circumstances are accurate.

 Gert says: Why does she feel the need to tell us, again, her intentions…of course it was to attack and impugn, the entire book is a raging attack on everyone and everything that favors adoption! Does Joan really believe that the world is full of fools and that they can’t see the details of a mentally ill person in the name of Joan Wheeler as she tells her life story?

 And here are more lies. It was Joan herself that made public our real identities, not once but several times. On Pg 634, footnote #15 of Forbidden Family she references her article The Secret is Out, written and published in 1990 where Joan published our full real names. We objected to that then and as Joan tells it, we harassed her. No! If she was not ‘outing’ the identities of us in the book Forbidden Family then WHY did she put in the reference to an article that identifies us and where anyone could find that information? And then why on the web page for Forbidden Family does she have our names? Why does she have a SECOND web page, with our names were she spreads more vicious lies and hate? Why does she go on the Adult Adoptees Advocating for Change and tell our names and whine and cry and ask for their help in beating us up?

 And the incidents and circumstances are NOT accurate, as Joan portrays them, that is why there is this refuting blog…to tell the truth.

 Further more Joan went out on the Internet and made public our identities…and here is the proof.

 from a google search:   

Personal Injury Law Questions – I am a disabled social worker on

Dec 19, 2009 Refuting Some of Joan Mary Wheeler’s Statements « Refutting There is another sister by the name of Gert McQueen who lives in Watertown,
www.justanswer.comPersonal Injury LawCached
 
 Customer Question

I am a disabled social worker on SSI; limited income. I just published a book that is memoir and social activism. I am an adoptee reunited with my natural family for 35 years. My three old sisters (ages 57, 61, 62) have been harassing me by various methods for over three decades, and so have adoptive relatives. They attacked me for: writing articles in the paper for adoptees’ civil rights to our sealed birth certificates and now, because I have published my book. I’ve had numerous Orders of Protection, but they keep bothering me. I want them to stay away from me forever. No contact at all. My sisters that I was reunited with have used hate mail, hate phone calls to invade my home and homelife. They’d die down for a few years, and then start up again. They even charged my then-80 year old adoptive mother with sex abuse, and me, because, according to the workers who showed up at the door, “I was having sex with my sister’s boyfriend on the living room couch and my mother forced the kids to watch.” We went through three months of court in 1997 to clear our names. Now, my sisters are publically humiliating me. They shut down my two former blogs because they do not want me to write a book about my life. Yes, I followed a lawyer’s advice on how to write a book. I am an adoption activist. They read my website, twist what I say, and then they post malicious and libelous material on their blogs naming me outright. I went to the police. No help. Freedom of Press. Really? What they are writing is turned away readership from my blog, which means, I have not only lost credibility, but business in not selling my book. How can I get them to cease and desist? Thank You, Joan Wheeler Buffalo, New York USA My website: http://forbiddenfamily.com My book’s sales link: http://www.trafford.com/Bookstore/BookDetail.aspx?BookId=SKU-000137652 My sisters’ blogs to attack me: http://chayelet.wordpress.com/ — Kathy Inglis uses the name of Chayelet. This woman lives in Liverpool, England • ruthsippelpace.wordpress.com/…/my-journal-of-joan-wheelers-abuse/ – Cached This woman lives in Buffalo, New York, several miles away from me. • Refuting Some of Joan Mary Wheeler’s Statements « Refutting There is another sister by the name of Gert McQueen who lives in Watertown, New York. How can I protect myself from them?

Submitted: 465 days and 17 hours ago.
Category: Personal Injury Law
Value: $15
Status: CLOSED
 
 Optional Information

State/Country relating to question: New York
Already Tried:
Police, no help, they said Freedom of Speech so my sisters can say anything online that they want to, even namimng me outright and maliciously defmaing me. I feel my personal and professional reputation has been ruined. I cannot afford to pay for a lwyer as my income in only$697 per month. But I could sell the book and write more books. Please look at those websites and tell me what I can do. Also, the one inn Liverpool states that I haev tried to deport her. I have no idea what she is talking about. I have not seen her since 1979 when I visited Liverpool, UK. We last spoke on the phone in 1988. The three sisters have written me a letter “throwing” me out of the family in 1992. I do not have contact with tham at all, but they find ways to harass me. Like getting my unlisted phone number from another relative and calling me. Now, it is cyber bullying and stalking and nalicious attacks upon me. Can I get them to pay me restitution for malicious defamtion of character and lying which drives people away frommy website?

 Accepted Answer
 You can stop your sisters and you can sell your books. You can sue them for harassment and intentional infliction of emotional distress. This way you could get monetary damages and an injunction to stop them from bullying you on their blogs. If they are preventing people from buying your book, you may also have a claim tortious interference with contract. You can also sue them for libel and slander, for lying about on their websites. You may also have another claim for tortious interference with contract because they froced you to shut down your websites. However, you will need a lawyer who can take this case to trial. There are personla injury lawyers who charge on a contingency fee basis. This way, they do not get paid unless you win. Call your local bar and ask for names of personal injury lawyers who specialize in these types of claims. Research these names. Go on www.marindale.com. Good luck and remember to press accept so that I may get credit.

Read more: Personal Injury Law Questions – I am a disabled social worker on SSI; limited income. I just – JustAnswer http://www.justanswer.com/personal-injury-law/2whab-disabled-social-worker-ssi-limited-income-just.html#ixzz1GoJRY46R

 And continuing on… what information does Trafford Publishing give to their potential authors…here are a couple of interesting points taken from their site.  (Ruth’s note: the sentances underlined below are the key points that Joan violated in her book and was the basis of the PUBLISHER’S decision to pull the book.- and what we have been saying on this blog since December 2009!)

 What is considered libel?

Libel has a variety of definitions throughout the United States depending on each state’s laws, but in general it is a written false defamation, or the publication of any statement that could cause damage to an individual or organization’s character or reputation.

 How can I protect myself against libel in publishing?
Although truth is in most cases a defense in a libel case, it is often difficult and lengthy (thus expensive) to prove in court. If your published book tells a true story about events that occurred, the first step to protect yourself is by changing the names of people or organizations in the book. However, simply changing a name from “Jim” to “David” is often not enough. If a person or others can recognize themselves from the situation, places or events even if their name is changed, you can still be sued for libel. Changing the location also helps to distance the story so that it is unrecognizable to real people. You can use a pen name to further distance any recognizable trail back to you or, most importantly, the real person, in order to avoid trouble.

For instance, imagine an individual reader knows you, the author in real life. If you make claims about your husband’s doctor, even if you change your husband’s name and the doctor’s name, but you keep your real name, it is pretty clear to someone involved who you are talking about in reality. By using a pen name and changing the name of people in the book, this will help to further remove the specifics and protect you against any libel claims.

Voicing an opinion is not libelous; however, be careful that you are not actually making an accusatory statement. Even if you say “in my opinion” before a statement, that does not automatically make the statement an opinion if you are speculating or asserting something about someone.

Do not make the following statements or claims, as they are clear grounds for a libel case: Falsely accusing someone of a crime, or having been charged, indicted or convicted of a crime; falsely identifying someone as the carrier of an infectious or loathsome disease; falsely charging someone or an organization with a claim that discredits or disqualifies a business, office or trade and lowers their profitability; and falsely accusing someone as being impotent.

Seriously consider if you are self-publishing a book that makes statements or reveals information that could damage someone, and consult a legal advisor if you are concerned.


Gert says: So there you have it, Joan in her self-importance deemed it a good thing for herself to use her real name and not take the advise of her publisher. She did not want to distance herself from those that she was writing about because she gave more than enough information in the pages of her book for ANYONE who knows the family to IDENTIFY the family and individuals and that is WHAT we sisters have been saying to the world…Joan Wheeler is a liar and her book is garbage and full of hate and disease.

 Joan said: It is my sincere hope that my sisters will continue to help publicize Forbidden Family as it is a must read for those interested in a thoughtful, in depth look at the issues surrounding this unnecessary closed adoption, and the possible ramifications on future families in reunion. And I would like to thank those who have read the book. I hope I have given them as much to think about as the satisfaction they have given me!

 Gert says: Rest assured Joan that we will indeed continue to show light on the book of lies that you wrote! If anyone is really willing to part with $45 to get anyone of the remaining copies of it, perhaps they ought to get you to sign it…for you are indeed a first class act…of stupidity! She is so full of herself to believe that her book is a ‘must read’ and that it is a ‘in depth look’ at the issues! Oh yes, she has given much for people to think about. Where are ALL those positive reviews of this great and wonderful book? There are only four that I have seen and I have debunked them all! So Joan, how about getting all those that you claim have benefited from this great and wonderful book to come forth and write something and put their names to it!

 What is your next act going to be Joan? You bombed with this one! A rewrite? Gosh to rewrite this book of over 600 pages, and take out all the stuff of your birth family will probably leave you with perhaps 200 pages! Better get busy and start that rewrite because this first book is DEAD!   

from Ruth – I shall be putting up my views on Gert’s post tomorrow – May 11, 2011, in the meantime, I have been authorized to post this comment from Kathy Inglis:

 I wasn’t going to comment, but, must say Thanks to Gert for enlightening me with regard to what Trafford consider as Libel. And all thanks to both Ruth and Gert for their tenacity in this matter.

 My one and only comment to Ms Wheeler is that she had better pray I never win the Lottery, because it is only lack of sufficient funds on my part that I have not taken legal action against her, apart from the fact that, even if I had funds, I’d use them for something more worthwhile. But you needn’t think you’re off the hook, sweatheart- that you will never be. Have a nice life, Joni Baby. Your FULL BLOOD SISTER KATHY.

 

THE BOOK FORBIDDEN FAMILY BY JOAN M. WHEELER HAS BEEN PULLED FROM PUBLICATION BECAUSE IT HAS BEEN PROVEN TO THE PUBLISHER THAT JOAN LIED IN THE BOOK! May 9, 2011

Posted by Ruth in Announcements and updates, Contradictions of Joan Wheeler, Joan Wheeler Speak - how Joan views the world, Joan Wheeler's abuse and harassment of her birth family, Lies in the book Forbidden Family, Refuting Joan Wheelers statements, Statements from The Three Sippel Sisters, Uncategorized.
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Readers of this blog and Joan’s website may be interested to know that:

THE BOOK FORBIDDEN FAMILY HAS BEEN PULLED FROM PUBLICATION BECAUSE OF THE MANY LIES TOLD IN IT.

Joan says on her website today, “thank you for the phenomenal publicity that we have given her.”

Roflmao! Another delusion from a person who needs to have psych medications!

Joan M. Wheeler has egg on her face – she has been EXPOSED as a LIAR and a CON-ARTIST!

The “phenomenal publicity” contained in this blog “Refuting the Book Forbidden Family” has always been to chronicle and PROVE with actual documents that Joan is a LIAR. Only an IMBECILE thanks the people who have brought attention to the fact that they are a LIAR!

There cannot be many actual copies of this book – She had to SELF-PUBLISH it, with the lowest package that the company offered – $800.00 – do the math people – the selling price of the book is $45.00 – it is offered on Amazon.com which gets about 40% of the monies. Trafford gets it’s cut – they have to make a profit – so figuring at least 75% going to Amazon and Trafford – that leaves $200.00  from her initial investment! Divide that up – I get about 4 and a half copies! We can account for 5 copies right off the bat. And having spoken on the phone with a representative from Trafford, we got this statement: “It is hardly a best-seller.” Roflmao! So who is Joan trying to fool? – Don’t be fooled by this con-artist – she’s a liar, she’s been exposed – she is dead in the water.

She may try to come up with a “new and improved” book, but rest assured, The Three Sippel Sisters will be right there to make dam sure she tells the truth.

So here is the email I sent to the publisher Trafford/Author Solutions over the weekend, and their response? THEY PULLED THE BOOK!

Now stop and ask yourself the question WHY? Why would the company pull the book just because I, Ruth, emailed them – BECAUSE THEY SEE THE PROOF THAT YOU DELUDED PEOPLE AND JOAN WON’T ADMIT TO: THAT JOAN M. WHEELER IS A LIAR! – Of course those people who see right through Joan’s lies are not delusional and know just what kind of nonsense, word-twisting, fact-twisting propaganda Joan is capable of. For Joan to try to justify her lies by saying she purposely mixed up dates and events to protect identities is BULLSHIT!

To lie about the length of an order of protection is protecting NO ONE! To stretch the actual time of six-months to one year does nothing to protect ANY one’s identity. To LIE about a non-event (a 3 month court battle and further LIE that “Brenda” accosted her children outside a court room was done to put her birth sister in a bad light and garner sympathy for herself UNDER FALSE PRETENSES). Don’t be fooled by her propaganda! She has said over and over that everything in her book was the TRUTH. Now, by saying she “mixed up dates and events” she is ADMITTING THAT SHE DID NOT PRESENT THE TRUTH. Like a true snake with a forked tongue, she is trying to cover her ass. DON’T BUY IT! Her own daughter says  “my mother is crafty at twisting words.”

I have said MANY times on this blog that Joan continuously mixes up dates and events and presents them in an untruthful manner. I have challenged her MANY times to come clean. I have said again and again that even when confronted by actual documents and her own handwritten letters to explain the discreencies, all she does is say she is telling the truth. For a year and a half this blog has been saying this over and over. For a year and a half she kept saying that – why all of a sudden is she changing her story? Because on Friday, May 6, she was told to do revisions of her book – and by posting her “thank you” on her website on Friday, she is COVERING HER LYING ASS! But after receiving an email from me on Monday morning (May 9,) the decision was made BY THE PUBLISHER that instead of a revision, the book Forbidden Family will be pulled in its entirety.

Her rationale of  lying was “Protecting identitys?” BALONEY! If she wrote ONLY the truth – the identity would still be protected – but what readers don’t know – is that in back in the early 1990’s she published a short article called “The Secret is Out” and used OUR TRUE NAMES! Anybody in the adoption reform field who read that article, then read the book Forbidden Family would already KNOW our names – because Joan had already published our names 20 years ago. So who is Joan kidding when she says that WE identified ourselves on this blog first – now SHE did. She did NOT protect our identities. Joan used her real name in the book. Sh used her real birth name Sippel and put MY family’s photo on the back – and it takes no genius in the City of Buffalo to recognize my father, a well-known employee at Buffalo City Hall, and many people knew about his giving his daughter for adoption – to put 2 and 2 together and identify me and others in the book.

She also puts in her book, my mother’s true name – and since MY name is in her obituary – published in 1956 – MY identity is right there. And smearing somebody’s reputation, whether you use their true name, or not is just simply the same thing – a smear campaign. Joan, you cannot weasel your way out of it – you are a LIAR! Plain and simple as that! LIAR!

Here then is my letter to the publisher:

May 6, 2011 –

Eugene Hopkins

Trafford, Author Solutions

Dear Mr. Hopkins,

I am the younger sister of Gert McQueen, with whom you have been in discussions with for the past few months over the book that your company published, “Forbidden Family” by Joan M. Wheeler.

I know that you had received our complaint about this book back on January 21, 2011. I also emailed you my co-complaint on this book. Included in my email, I attached several scanned official court documents pertaining to court cases between Ms. Wheeler and myself.

It is my understanding that recently you remarked to Gert that you were reluctant to get involved in a “family squabble.” Mr. Hopkins, Ms. Wheeler ceased to be a legal family member to us when she was adopted out of our family in 1957. Although we were reunited in 1974, I cut ties with her in 1990 after she stole hundreds of dollars from me. She further alienated herself to me in 1993 when she filed a false police report against me, over phone calls that I placed to her house, (in response to a letter she sent me). I called her house, and she said to me “hold on,” and hung up on me.  She then reported to the police that I was placing threatening calls to her. I was summoned into court and Ms. Wheeler was granted a six-month order of protection against me.

In her book, that your company published, she records this incident, but claims that I was placed under arrest (I was not.), that she was granted a one-year order of protection against me (it was for six-months), that I was placed on probation (I was not), and that I have a criminal record (I do not). 

I covered this and more in my emailed complaint to you and provided the actual court documents that prove that Ms. Wheeler lied, committing the crime of LIBEL in her book, that your company published.

In another part of her book, Ms. Wheeler describes a three month court battle between me and her in the year of 1994. This is completely false.

Also, on the back cover of the book, which your company published, is a family photograph that is of my parents, my siblings, and myself. Ms. Wheeler herself is NOT in the photograph at all – and the picture was taken BEFORE Ms. Wheeler was not even born, therefore, she wasn’t even a member of the family pictured on the back of her book. I have never given Ms. Wheeler permission, orally, or in writing, permission to use my photograph on her book. Also, since the photograph was taken sometime mid-1955, and Ms. Wheeler was born on January 7, 1956, and then 4 months later adopted out of the family, she does not OWN this photograph. She may “own” a paper copy of this photo, but since she was NOT a legal member of the family depicted in the photo, she does NOT have the legal right to publish it and gain monetary gain from it.

Whether you think of me and Ms. Wheeler as “family members” or not has no bearing on the basis of our complaint – that is being that Ms. Wheeler (and your company) has/have published my picture without my legal consent. In lying about a three month court case between us in 1994, and lying about the length of time the order of protection granted to her in 1993, Ms. Wheeler is presenting falsehoods about the City Court of the City of Buffalo. When Ms. Wheeler presents in her book that I was placed under arrest, she is presenting falsehoods about the Buffalo Police Department.

Further, may I ask you Mr. Hopkins, should a person be subjected to such slander and libel with no recourse, simply because they are related to the perpetrator? The issue of Ms. Wheeler being related to me and Gert is a NON-issue. Ms. Wheeler lied in her book. That is all that should concern you.

Gert tells me that several times in her conversations with you, you have told her that our complaint is in your legal department, and you have yet to hear back from your lawyers.

On your website is the Terms and Conditions for authors to agree to when submitting their work for publication. I cite the following items that Ms. Wheeler is in violation of YOUR own Terms and Conditions.

2. YOUR LEGAL RESPONSIBILITY

2.1. You represent that (i) you are the sole copyright owner of the Work and all of its content.

   Ms. Wheeler is in violation of this because she has MY likeness on the back of her book, WITHOUT my consent.

2.4. You further represent that the Work does not contain illegal, unlawful or objectionable material including, but not limited to, pornography, obscenity or hate speech. You acknowledge that the Work is not plagiarized and does not include

falsely attributed statements of third parties.

.    Ms. Wheeler is in violation of the second sentence, because as I pointed out above, she has lied about actual court proceedings between her and me.

I further cite YOUR Terms and Conditions as presented to authors on your website:

7. TERMINATION OF AGREEMENT

7.1. Suspension of Services. Upon a breach, default, or failure by you to comply with these Terms and Conditions or the failure to cooperate with us in the provision of any Services, we will have the right to suspend any or all performance until you cooperate with these Terms and Conditions and/or cooperate with us in the provision of Services.

Since I have just pointed out that Ms. Wheeler IS in violation of 2.1 and 2.4 of YOUR Terms and Conditions as presented on your website, Mr. Hopkins, you have NO choice, but to pull the book Forbidden Family off the market, your website, and your advertisement of it on Amazon.com. I don’t understand why your lawyers cannot come up with a timely interpretation of your own terms and conditions, the definition of the term libel, and the application of the term libel to Ms. Wheeler’s statements of me in her book that you published.

On page 670 of the Tenth Edition (1994) of the Merriam-Webster’s Collegiate Dictionary are the following definitions of the term LIBEL:

–          A written or oral defamatory statement or representation that conveys an unjustly unfavorable impression.

–          A statement or representation published without just cause and tending to expose another to public contempt.

–          Defamation of a person by written or representable means

–          The act, tort, or crime of publishing such a libel

I believe that all four definitions cover what Ms. Wheeler has done in her book. By falsely reporting in her book that I have an arrest record, she is conveying a unjustly unfavorable impression.

You have stated to Mrs. McQueen that you do not want to be in the middle of a “family squabble.” This is no “family squabble.” It is accurate accusation of libel and a justifiable demand for the pulling of this book.

I expect to be hearing shortly on your decision to do a right and lawful action: the pulling of this libelous book.

Thank you for your help in this matter.

Very sincerely yours,

Mrs. Ruth Pace

cc: Kevin Weiss; Kevin A. Gray; Gert McQueen

What is Joan Wheeler’s Story? And does it really merit the idea to abolish adoption? May 5, 2011

Posted by Ruth in Joan Wheeler Speak - how Joan views the world.
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by Ruth Sippel Pace 

So what is Joan Wheeler’s story? Let’s see, she was born to a woman dying of cancer. She spent her first 6 weeks in an incubator. She was relinquished to adoption and adopted and raised by two people who, in Joan’s eyes, were “horrible and mean.” She lived to the age of 18 with these “horrible” people and then was found by her birth siblings. Her birth siblings tried to get to know her but then turned out to be “mean and horrible” to her.

So?

So now Joan wants to rewrite society because people were “mean and horrible” to her.

 Oh good grief!     http://www.dramabutton.com/

I demand to see the long form birth certificate and long form death certificate of Osama bin Laden May 2, 2011

Posted by Ruth in Announcements and updates.
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I was being sarcastic because of Joan Wheeler’s constant whining about her birth certificate and I was mocking out Donald Trump.

Osama is in a good place, Now the sailors can piss on his grave. Go SEALS!

The internet is on fire with the news that Osama bin Laden was killed by US Special Forces, Navy Seals.

Some sources are saying he was killed a week ago, other say he was killed on April 29, April 30 and May 1. Other sources are saying he had died way back in 2001.

This is just too confusing. In wake of President Obama’s recent producing his own personal long form birth certificate, we need to see the long form birth certificate of Osama bin Laden. AND we need to see the long form death certificate of Osama bin Laden. 

Inquiring minds want to know.

off blog topic – US Navy SEALS take out Osama bin Laden May 2, 2011

Posted by Ruth in Announcements and updates.
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I don’t know the full story yet – my husband John, a former Navy SEAL cooked us a nice beef stew overnight (Saturday) in the slow cooker. We had some wine, red for him, a white Chardonnay for me and we had a divne Beltane feast for two!  since I don’t drink very much, the wine made me sleep and I fell asleep on the couch and I went on facebook and saw one of my cousins post about bin Laden. YAY! Go SEALS! Go NAVY!

I am so sick of Joan Wheeler’s whining about her adoption and her birth certificate and nobody understands her and –and — I’m going to throw up now May 1, 2011

Posted by Ruth in Contradictions of Joan Wheeler, Joan Wheeler Speak - how Joan views the world, Joan Wheeler's abuse and harassment of her birth family, Refuting Joan Wheelers statements.
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On June 10, 2011, The Buffalo News finally published Joan’s letter, proving her whine about Buffalo being a conservative city worthless – see Joan, if you would SHUT UP your stupid insults on everyone and everybody and GIVE PEOPLE and The Buffalo News A CHANCE – they just might come around to doing what you want. Jumping up and down and screaming and yelling that they won’t publish your letter made you just look like the whiney brat that you are – GROW UP!

“You can look back at your past, and feel sorry for yourself – or you can look back and see how it served you.” — author unknown

BEADY Eyes are everywhere, so qwitcher bitchin!

On Friday, April 29, 2011, Joan Wheeler makes an announcement that she had submitted a letter to the editor of our local newspaper, but she didn’t want to post it before its publication, to prevent her birth sister’s “beedie” eyes from seeing it. roflmao! This “accomplished” writer doesn’t even know how to spell “beady!” – Okay, we’re all human, we all make spelling and grammar mistakes, and the occasional typo on the internet. I just had to point Joan’s faux pas out because she’s always so full of herself and her own “self-importance” and “importance” to the adoption reform community. She just needs to be taken down a peg or two. And of course she needs to be taken down, because AGAIN, she insults her birth sisters. She doesn’t like the fact that we, her birth sisters are monitoring what she writes about us. We know for a fact, despite her saying that she doesn’t, she DOES read this blog. And so do some of her adoptee buddies. Do we call them names bcause they read our blog?

Listen, it’s the internet – you’re going to get all kinds of people, wanted or not, reading what you write. So suck it up. But see, Joan just loves to bitch. She goes on to say that The Buffalo News won’t publish her editorial. How does she know? She must have called them up and bugged them. I will tell you the procedures The Buffalo News has for accepting a letter via email or snail mail. You must provide them with your name, address and phone number. If they are interested in your letter, they will call you on the phone, to verify that you did indeed submit the letter. Sometimes this phone call may take a week in coming. If you get no phone call after a week, you can be sure that your letter will not get published. They do NOT contact you to tell you that they are not going to publish your letter. And sometimes, even though you get a phone call from them, they still do not publish your letter. I know this, because I have submitted letters to the Buffalo News and some have been published, others have not. I don’t get all bent out of shape about it – because I have other venues that I can turn to.

What was Joan’s letter about? The usual redundant whine about her birth certificate. With four short additional sentances about President Obama and his birth certificate. Now Pres. Obama produced his birth certificate on Wednesday, April 27. And Joan is complaining on Saturday, April 30 that the Buffalo News won’t publish her letter. Geez, Joan, give the editorial staff a break – maybe they will call you on Monday!!

But I have feeling that they probably won’t publish her letter? Why? Because they have published letters of Joan’s in the past – and about the same subject! It’s called a NEWSpaper, Joan, your letter hardly contained anything NEW, just the same tired whine that Joan moans about day in and day out, ad nauseum. And the newspaper does not HAVE to publish her letters, my letters, or anybody else’s letter. That’s a fact of life Joan, accept it.

And people, yes, The Buffalo News HAS published letters of Joan’s in the past. she even has some of them posted on her blog.  And as for her charge that we live in a conservative city and the newspaper won’t publish her letter – um she admits on her blog that they HAVE published her letters. – See there, another LIE from Joan Wheeler.  And if they won’t publish you anymore Joan, I suggest get another venue – how about Artvoice? And the other grass roots news publications in around Buffalo. oh oh – I did it now. Joan will probably go and make a PEST out of herself to those publications. That is the real reason that I suspect The Buffalo News didn’t publish her letter – they probably saw her email and said “oh no, it’s that Joan Wheeler nut again” But then again, this is all pure speculation – Joan may be pleasantly surprised on Monday or Tuesday and get that phone call from The Buffalo News and by next Saturday, open up her newspaper (or check online), and see her letter published. I won’t bother to read it – I’ve seen it before. And so have the editors of the Buffalo News. Because Joan repeats herself over and over and over and over and over and over. But she never gets her point across to the important people. And neither do any of the other angry adoptees. Why? Because they are so full of their anger, they don’t know how to talk to people. I have seen Joan and another adoptee post at some internet sites, and the moderators have to tell them to stop swearing. I have seen Joan totally removed from the Huffington Post.

Yes, any of my readers who on Friday read my posts about the crap lies that Joan spread on The Huffington Post, when you clicked on the links in my post, and got the message “This profile has been removed,” that’s because Joan was REMOVED from The Huffington Post for violating that site’s rules and violating human civility and privacy customs and rules – yes – she went online and accused my grandfather of being a sexual predator, my grandfather, who has been dead since 1959, two years after Joan was adopted out of our family, and Joan NEVER met, had his reputation smeared by this bitch called Joan Wheeler! Further, Joan said that I, and my sisters were sexually molested by our grandfather. This is a LIE! And even if it were true – what kind of bitch spread this shit on the internet? – The BITCH called Joan Wheeler – that’s who.

And YES, We Sippel Sisters contacted The Huffington Post and alerted them to this abuse! And within a half hour – Joan was KICKED OFF THE HUFFINGTON POST!

Joan, you need to control the diarrhea of your mouth. NO ONE is going to take you seriously when you talk shit like that. And that goes for the other angry adoptees as well, who bore people to death with their anger, their self-pitying angst, their refusal to GROW UP and see that other people are in pain too! Oh boo hoo – I was adopted. My amom is a BITCH! Yeah, well the world is full of bitches. And god forbid that their amom was a rape victim and they unfortunately were the product of a rape, and the amom couldn’t handle raising the child, to be constantly reminded of the RAPE. Oh boo hoo, the child was adopted –  they care about the rape victims pain? You know, it may have been more than just a simple forcing of the woman- it may have been extremely VIOLENT. Do those adoptees care? No – they don’t see an amom as a human being who has pain, and suffers too. AND MAKES AN ALL TOO HUMAN THING CALLED A MISTAKE! Is Joan or any other adoptee MISTAKE- FREE? What gives them  (or anyone) the right to hurt a human being just because they themselves have been hurt? When you go around spreading hate against adoptive parents and infertile people, you are not helping your cause, all you’re accomplishing is turning people against you.

 Yes, there are some toads out there who don’t care about their children – we just locked one bitch up who after years of abusing her biological disabled daughter, killed her. She also encouraged the girl’s half brother to sexually assault her and on the day of Laura Cummings death, her brother was told by their mother to pour scalding water on her, then she was raped AGAIN, then her mother strangled her. SOMEONE should have adopted Laura! god help me, I wish I could have. That poor woman, for all her 23 years was TORTURED.  Oh – did I say that horrible word? ADOPTION! yes and I’m proud of it. Joan, grow up. You are not the only human on this planet to have experienced pain. You are just not that important.

Please google Laura Cummings – walk one minute in that girl’s shoes – then shut up about your friggin adoption pain. Fucking crybabies.

from The Buffalo News: By Jay Tokasz and Gene Warner NEWS STAFF REPORTERS

Published: February 27, 2010, 10:08 AM
 A good night for Laura Cummings meant being allowed to sleep on the kitchen floor in her family’s North Collins home.

Usually in the weeks leading up to her death, she was forced to sleep shackled to a metal chair with a sack over her face.

Days were even more nightmarish for the 23-year-old mentally disabled woman, who was held captive and brutalized, allegedly by her own mother and half brother, according to an Erie County Grand Jury indictment returned Friday.  Cummings’ short life ended Jan. 21 with a long, tortuous death and a trail of missed chances to get her to safety.

A grand jury indicted Cummings’ mother, Eva M. Cummings, 51, and her half brother, Luke J. Wright, 31, on charges related to the homicide, but authorities continued to be confounded by the apparent lack of community concern for the defenseless woman’s welfare.

“There were a lot of people who knew what was going on and said nothing, and that is a sad commentary on the human condition,” said District Attorney Frank A. Sedita III.

Clues and reports about mistreatment inside the apartment at 2052 Sherman Ave. popped up frequently over the years. Siblings and other relatives said they called Child Protective Services and Adult Protective Services. Whispers floated around town, including at the food pantry, that Cummings was being tied up at home.

“This is the problem today and nobody wants to get involved,” added Caroline Lee, who lives down the street from the Cummings apartment.

The pantry was one of the few places in town where Laura Cummings, a petite woman with short brown hair who rarely made eye contact with people, was seen in public away from her home.

Lee called Laura Cummings’ younger brother, Richard, about the suspected abuse, and Richard contacted Erie County Adult Protective Services.  “They never went inside the household and they never filed for a warrant to go inside,” said Richard Cummings, who is serving in the Air Force and is stationed in North Carolina. “I’m wondering why … Adult Protective Services didn’t do anything about it.”

Instead, the abuse intensified over the last few months of Laura’s life, said investigators. “Starting in November, there’s a significant escalation of her debasement as a human being,” Senior Trial Counsel Thomas M. Finnerty of the DA’s Office said. “It was happening on a daily or nightly basis.”

Finnerty, who has prosecuted a number of heinous crimes in his 17 years in the DA’s office, called it “the worst case I’ve ever seen.”  “It’s sadistic, and it’s allegedly sustained over a long period of time,” he said.

That was especially true of the unlawful imprisonment of Laura Cummings, in the weeks preceding her death.

“She’s restrained more often than she’s not,”Sheriff’s Capt. Ronald L. Kenyon said.

At other times, she was treated as an inanimate object, draped with a blanket so that visitors who stopped by the apartment wouldn’t know she was there, according to authorities.

Eva Cummings and Luke Wright were indicted on a total of 15 charges in connection with the suffocation death of Laura Cummings. They are expected to be arraigned at 2 p.m. Monday before Erie County Court Judge Sheila A. DiTullio.

Eva Cummings faces a second-degree murder charge, while her son is charged with five sexual assault charges. Both are accused of using a broomstick to sexually attack the young woman, as well as forcing her to touch her own waste and scalding her with hot water, according to the indictment papers.

Mother and son also are accused of unlawfully imprisoning Laura Cummings because of her mental disability — an elevated hate crime charge.  “It’s a hate crime because it’s motivated in whole or substantial part by the belief or perception regarding the victim’s disability,” Sedita said.

Eva Cummings could face a possible sentence of 83 years to life on five charges, while her son could face 142 years to life on 10 charges, prosecutors said. The charges, based on extensive investigation by four Erie County sheriff’s detectives and statements from both suspects, paint an extremely troubling portrait of the alleged abuse against the young woman who talked with a speech impediment, had difficulty swallowing food and was said to have the mental capacity of a pre-teenage girl.

Sedita and Kenyon praised sheriff’s Detectives Gregory McCarthy, Dennis Fitzgibbon, Matthew Noecker and Jack Graham.

The efforts of the Sheriff’s Department were dogged, Sedita said.

“They didn’t stop. They interviewed basically the whole town of North Collins.”

Both mother and son are charged with unlawful imprisonment and endangering the welfare of a mentally disabled person.

“If the allegations are true, it is clear that the defendants did not treat Laura as a human being,” said Sedita. “In fact, if these allegations are true, one wonders if either one of them even considered Laura to be a human being.”

Laura Cummings’ tragic life might have gone in a different direction on several occasions, starting when she was a youngster, according to various sources. As a child, she and other siblings were placed with foster families in Florida that tried unsuccessfully to adopt the children, said Patricia Wright, Laura’s half-sister.

The Cummings household, in North Collins and prior to that in Olean, was well-known to Child Protective Services in Erie and Cattaraugus counties, family members said.

Patricia Wright, 27, said she reported abuse to Erie County Child Protective Services and Erie County Family Court more than a decade ago.  “I stopped talking to them when I was 17 years old because there was nothing being done,” said Wright, who was legally adopted by a family friend and is pursuing a bachelor’s degree in forestry management. “I kept trying to tell them, You need to get those kids out of there.’ And they said, ‘No there’s nothing we can do.’ “

Patricia Wright said she was physically abused for years, resulting in a broken ankle and cracked vertebrae in her back.  “I would get hit with baseball bats, spoons, anything that mom could grab a hold of,” she said. “We got hurt every day. She didn’t take us to the hospital.”

She was even locked in a closet for a week, and her brother, Luke, sneaked her bread and water, she said. After spending time at a facility for teenagers, Patricia Wright was legally adopted by Roland Grotke, a neighbor of her grandparents in East Otto. She said she tried to return to the home and rescue Laura, but was rebuffed by her mother.

“I knew my Mom was kind of off upstairs,” said Patricia Wright. “I knew she was incapable of taking care of a person like Laura, who needed that extra help.”  Neither Richard Cummings nor Patricia Wright had been allowed to visit Laura Cummings in recent years, they said.

more on this sad case. poor child.

http://www.cbsnews.com/8301-504083_162-20023134-504083.html?tag=contentMain;contentBody

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