jump to navigation

Joan Wheeler needs to stop judging my life October 13, 2011

Posted by Ruth in Joan Wheeler Speak - how Joan views the world, Uncategorized.
Tags: , , , , , , , , ,

In her stupid book, Joan makes a lot of judgment calls – she puts down people in trailer parks, (trailer trash she says). She puts down people living in Buffalo’s inner city (never mind she herself once lived in the inner city), she puts down my sister Gert because of her religion, she put me down because I like horror movies and I’m a neighborhood activist who stands up to drug dealers and organized a block club.


She published an obscene note that she received in the mail – there were two different handwritings on the note – and she said that the note was written by me and my best friend – neither sample of handwriting on the note is mine or my friend’s. Joan then says the language on the note is the same inner city style language that me and my friend use. And that language reflected the lifestyle we had chosen.

Okay, I admit it, I so swear. So what? So do a lot of people! — ha ha ha! So does Joan! On the Adult Adoptees Advocating for Change forum, she calls us, her birth sisters fuckheads.

So what’s up with the inner city trash moniker? Let’s examine the White Trash at work.

In August 1990, I accompanied Joan to the mall. I was at her house – in the inner city and we were going to take her then 4 year old daughter with us. It was just after 6:00 pm – a beautiful sunny summer late afternoon. Joan’s husband had just gotten home from work about 20 minutes earlier and was sitting in the living room watching the evening news. Joan and I were outside. I was standing on the sidewalk in front of her house, and Joan was backing the car out the driveway. When she got the car down to the sidewalk, she got out of the car, and Joan’s daughter, who had been standing on the porch steps started walking across the lawn to her mother and stepped in dog poop. Joan let out some nice colorful metaphors! “Son of a bitch! COLBY!” Joan grabbed her daughter’s arm and marched her back up the porch steps. “COLBY GET OFF YOUR FUCKING ASS AND BE A FATHER TO YOUR KIDS!” By this point, she had opened the front door and shoved her daughter in the door. She then stood on the front door and continued her tirade-  yelling and screaming obscenities!   Meanwhile, I stood on the sidewalk, mortified. I looked around and saw the neighbors stop what they were doing to watch. I wanted the earth to swallow me up. Because Joan and I look a lot alike, I was sick. I didn’t want these people to know I was related to this raving lunatic.

So Joan – look at the quote from Bob Marley – yes, I, Ruth, do swear and use cuss words, but so do you.

And by the way, MY lifestyle includes a 39 year career with the same employer – Joan can’t hold down a job at all. MY lifestyle includes a very happy and stable marriage. MY lifestyle includes many good friends, a wide and varied number of interests and hobbies. Unlike Joan, who actually chronicled her wasted life in her stupid book.

You really should have made sure your own hands were clean Joan before you started judging my life and plastering MY life in the pages of your stupid book. And may I ask one more time? – what does MY life have to do with YOUR adoption? What does the fact that I am a neighborhood activitst have to do with her adoption and adoption reform? What does the fact I live in the inner city have to do with her adoption and adoption reform? What does the fact that I like horror movies have to do with her adoption and adoption reform? ABSOLUTELY NOTHING! So what is it doing in her book? Yeah, tell us again how your book is about you and adoption reform. That trash book was about US and all the other people in your miserable life that you wanted to get back at. Tell the dam truth for once in your life.

UPDATE, FEBRUARY 2016, as older posts are being seen I’m updating with links to my second blog and a Facebook page wherein I expose AGAIN the lies, fabrications and hate that Joan M Wheeler says about me and family. After the first book was pulled from publication by the publisher, May 2011, she has ‘self-published’ another ‘revised’ version. In this ‘version’ called ‘duped by adoption’ she has increased her exploitation by including PICTURES and REAL NAMES and much more personal information violating again the families. Joan has no decency NOR shame. There is NOTHING in this book for adoption reform. She is totally against adoption and her two families. To learn more see…





1. gertmcqueen - October 14, 2011

From the public forum for Adult Adoptees Advocating for Change we find the following question asked …

QOTD – 11th Oct 2011 « on: October 11, 2011, 05:27:13 AM »

How do you define yourself?

And Joan, as 1adoptee says:
Re: QOTD – 11th Oct 2011 « Reply #4 on: October 11, 2011, 11:26:47 AM »
Today I define myself as the mother of a wonderful 25 year old daughter! She is 25 today! Yeah!

I say: Why didn’t Joan just give her daughter the recognization of having her birthday without the ‘defining’ of what Joan is? Because, the 25 year old is still living at home with a dominating mother who pulls all the strings. Like mother, like daughter…can you hear the yelling and screaming and foul language from your computer? I can!

Sorry comments are closed for this entry

%d bloggers like this: