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I wish Joan Wheeler would stop stealing phrases from my blog – does she EVER have any original thoughts? December 30, 2011

Posted by Ruth in Joan Wheeler Speak - how Joan views the world.
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So last night Joan spouts some more “wisdom” over at the Adult Adoptees Advocating for Change forum. –

“Foofie’s right. Telling a poor mother that she would be better off giving away her child so she could go on to lead a better life (go to college, get a career, etc) and, therefore, her child would also be better off away from her and poverty, well, this is just buying into what society has been dishing out for decades. That’s the Adoption Machine’s motto — that adoptive parents will provide a better life for the adoptee. Well, adoptive parents certainly do die young sometimes, leaving the adoptee without one or both adoptive parents. An orphan, again. To be adopted again? Maybe. And, adoptive parents certainly do face hard economic times, too. Telling a poor mother to give up her child because she is poor is a cruelty to her and her child. Family preservation means just what Foofie said — extending kindness, support, social services, food stamps, Medicaid, education and job training, child care while she does these things to get income, and community support from churches and other social organizations such as the locall YMCA that often have 50% scholarships to low income families so their children can attend camp and year-long Y activities. Socially isolating the mother is not good. She doesn’t live in a vaccuum. She has a family and so the family members can help too. And the unmarried father can be drawn in as well. …. Being cast off because your mother was poor really sends a negative message to the adoptee. That’s one of the reasons why most of us hate being adopted.”

Pay attention to the words that I bolded:  She doesn’t live in a vaccuum.  – These are direct thoughts and words of Gert McQueen. I myself have never used that phrase, but Gert has used it several times. Most recently on December 27 in her post “Gert McQueen’s review of Rene Hoksbergen’s review of Forbidden Family by Joan Wheeler” – 4th paragraph down, Gert says “No one lives in a vacuum. At least Gert spelled the word vacuum correctly! Joan, the oh-so-professional “author” didn’t get it right.

We have said several times on this blog that Joan is a Master Manipulator – She is also a Foolish Follower. We have caught many other instances where she has taken phrases from our blogs and used them elsewhere. And she had the nerve to complain once to the AAAC forum “I don’t read their blogs, are they writing to the air?” I blogged once before about that – around springtime 2010 – that we know that Joan reads our blog because she gives herself away. But not only does she “follow” our blog – she “follows” other people! We have seen where someone posts something on the forum, and in just a few days, here comes Joan writing about something and she swipes phrases from the original post. And after reading her book, and harassing letters for years, and dealing with her in person for many years, we know how Joan thinks and speaks. So when we see something on her blog – we can tell when it’s HER own original words or somebody else’s suggestions.

Joan is full of hyperbole, exagerations, and contradictions. She is transparent to us, we who have learned the hard way how she operates, speaks, writes and thinks. She doesn’t fool us. She may have in the past, been able to pull the wool over our eyes, but we learned our lessons – we learned how Joan the Snake works. We recognize her forked tongue.  

 

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1. gertmcqueenDecember 30, 2011

Gert here:
great post Ruth!! excellent in fact!!

Joan is so good at trying to look ‘learned’ when in fact she just can’t pull it off. Joan has no real knowledge of how the real world works, because she has been spoiled by the very adopted parents she hates and condemns over and over again.

Joan keeps talking about some kind of ‘family perservation’ so that no child should be adopted out. Guess what?? That is a pie in the sky nicey nicey way of thinking…but it doesn’t work for all people all the time!! Get real!!

Joan says, in the above post, She has a family and so the family members can help too

Really now, the family can help….let me tell you that it is the RARE family that can and does help!!

In our own family there was NO ONE who COULD HELP…that is why Joan was adopted out, and the other four children were in foster homes and orphan homes. In my own personal life…I have two children…NO ONE helped me raised them, not even their own father!!

There was no one in my immediate family or extended family or the in-law family to help me CARE FOR MY CHILDREN but ME!!! I raised my children alone for 12 years while I managed to WORK and go to school and EARN A DEGREE and keep a job for 37 years!!

I really find it appalling that someone, Joan, who has TWO college degrees, but no significant job under her belt, who had everything given to her by the adopted parents, who still cries the blues because she was adopted!

No wonder she has such a miserable life….she never had developed inner strength. I would like to know who in Joan’ family is going to take care of her when she gets old and has to have someone TAKE CARE OF HER? Who Joan, in your family, is going to take care of you.

 
2. RuthDecember 30, 2011

uh, Gert, did you forget that even now, Joan has forced her 25 year old daughter to work two jobs to support them in a house they can not afford. My father urged Joan several years ago to sell the house and move to an affordable apartment.

In a private facebook message, Joan’s ex-husband told me that he finds it “disgusting” that his daughter works 2 jobs. My niece also lamented in a myspace message to me in Nov. 2009 “Don’t I have a right to a life of my own?”, Instead of building her own life, is now “raising” Joan.

Joan’s ex-husband also told me “Joan has fixed it so that (eventually) she will lose the house.” He told me that he and his current wife offered to buy the house (and rent it out to Joan), but she refused. This delusional dingbat, who couldn’t afford to fix her own car in 2009 thinks she can hold down a mortgage, do necessary house repairs, when she is on Social Security Disability. – So why doesn’t the “extended” family help out? Why the f should they?

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Comments

1. gertmcqueen - December 30, 2011

Gert here:
great post Ruth!! excellent in fact!!

Joan is so good at trying to look ‘learned’ when in fact she just can’t pull it off. Joan has no real knowledge of how the real world works, because she has been spoiled by the very adopted parents she hates and condemns over and over again.

Joan keeps talking about some kind of ‘family perservation’ so that no child should be adopted out. Guess what?? That is a pie in the sky nicey nicey way of thinking…but it doesn’t work for all people all the time!! Get real!!

Joan says, in the above post, She has a family and so the family members can help too

Really now, the family can help….let me tell you that it is the RARE family that can and does help!!

In our own family there was NO ONE who COULD HELP…that is why Joan was adopted out, and the other four children were in foster homes and orphan homes. In my own personal life…I have two children…NO ONE helped me raised them, not even their own father!!

There was no one in my immediate family or extended family or the in-law family to help me CARE FOR MY CHILDREN but ME!!! I raised my children alone for 12 years while I managed to WORK and go to school and EARN A DEGREE and keep a job for 37 years!!

I really find it appalling that someone, Joan, who has TWO college degrees, but no significant job under her belt, who had everything given to her by the adopted parents, who still cries the blues because she was adopted!

No wonder she has such a miserable life….she never had developed inner strength. I would like to know who in Joan’ family is going to take care of her when she gets old and has to have someone TAKE CARE OF HER? Who Joan, in your family, is going to take care of you.

2. Ruth - December 30, 2011

uh, Gert, did you forget that even now, Joan has forced her 25 year old daughter to work two jobs to support them in a house they can not afford. My father urged Joan several years ago to sell the house and move to an affordable apartment.

In a private facebook message, Joan’s ex-husband told me that he finds it “disgusting” that his daughter works 2 jobs. My niece also lamented in a myspace message to me in Nov. 2009 “Don’t I have a right to a life of my own?”, Instead of building her own life, is now “raising” Joan.

Joan’s ex-husband also told me “Joan has fixed it so that (eventually) she will lose the house.” He told me that he and his current wife offered to buy the house (and rent it out to Joan), but she refused. This delusional dingbat, who couldn’t afford to fix her own car in 2009 thinks she can hold down a mortgage, do necessary house repairs, when she is on Social Security Disability. – So why doesn’t the “extended” family help out? Why the f should they?


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