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Joan Wheeler, angry adoptee, is a glutton for punishment, she seeks it out! Then whines when she’s called-out! November 27, 2013

Posted by gertmcqueen in Uncategorized.
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Reclaiming the Sippel-Herr Family Honor

She’s needs to LET GO of her anger; it’s eating her up! Joan Wheeler needs to stop telling lies/fabrications about her adoption & her exploitation of our family! She really needs to stop! No one pays any attention to her! Everyone, except her fellow angry adoptees (some of which don’t listen to her), have seen what Joan is….a freaking idiot! She is NOT changing anything in the world of adoption. What Joan Wheeler needs to do is get rid of her hate/slander pages/websites against the birth sibling! Simple! We have been saying this now for over four years!

Joan Wheeler NEEDS to name the REAL cause of her hatred against adoption….name the abusers…her ADOPTIVE PARENT/FAMILY…whoever it is…she needs to name them and stop blaming her lousy life on adoption and the birth siblings! Joan Wheeler hates adoption BECAUSE she was abused by the adoptive parents/family. Until she acknowledges that and…

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What IS it with those angry adoptees that they cannot comprehend English? November 15, 2013

Posted by Ruth in Uncategorized.
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They just don’t get it.

#1. I may be pro-adoption, but that does NOT mean I am against open adoption records or for falsified adoption/birth certificates.

#2. I don’t give a shit WHY my sister Joan Wheeler is “crazy” – she could have become mentally ill because she took drugs and fried her brains – SHE DOES NOT HAVE THE RIGHT TO DO WHAT SHE HAS DONE TO ME.

#3. When Gert wrote her article to outline why our reunion with our adopted out sister went bad – she signed her name as Gert McQueen. I left a couple of comments with my name Ruth Herr Sippel Pace. We both used our facebook signon names.

Now, I did have a bit of a tit-for-tat with one adoptee named Dana. Dana started trashing my father, whom she never met and did not know the EXACT situation of my family. Dana even suggested that the older siblings could have taken care of the infant instead of the infant being placed for adoption. Since Dana was ignorant of the fact that the oldest sibling was only 9 years old – I corrected her.

After that, I went clicked on Dana’s name on the comments and it took me to her facebook page. Yes, I looked at her facebook page, and saw someone who I thought was intelligent. I sent her a friend request. Just because we had a difference of opinion does not mean we are “enemies.”

In fact, the evening of November 14, Dana and I had a rather intelligent conversation on facebook.

I had another intelligent conversation with another facebook friend of mine today about adoption – she is an adoptee and totally understands when I say – “I don’t care WHY your head is messed up – YOU DON’T HAVE THE RIGHT TO ABUSE ME.”

WHAT IS SO HARD TO UNDERSTAND ABOUT THAT! I was reunited with my adopted out sister in 1974. By 1980 she started to abuse me. I gave her chance after after chance. When she STOLE HUNDREDS OF DOLLARS FROM ME – I TOLD HER TO GET LOST! To the angry adoptees out there – I committed a mortal sin!


Anyway, tonight, I find Dana defriended and blocked me. I called up a friend of mine to see what’s up on Dana’s fb page and she emailed me this post that Dana wrote. – Dana says she was blindsided because of different last names? She didn’t pay attention to our names when she trashed our father? Apparently not. She twists things around and says that I said “all adoptees are crazy, and it’s their fault, being crazy, that no one wants to open adoption records.”

When just today I had an intelligent conversation with my fb freind where I condemned the ones who advocate violence. AND I said that I was FOR open records. Well, dammit Dana, you just proved my point – you are just as batty as my sister Joan Wheeler. I thought we could be “buds” – and perhaps learn from each other – and the whole point of my conversation with my adoptee fb friend was: IF YOU WANT PEOPLE IN AUTHORITY (SURROGATE COURTS, CONGRESSMEN, ETC) TO TAKE YOUR REQUESTS FOR OPEN ADOPTION RECORDS SERIOUSLY – THEN PAY ATTENTION TO WHAT PEOPLE ARE SAYING AND DON’T TWIST THINGS AROUND AND PUT WORDS IN PEOPLE’S MOUTHS.


It is very clear as to who she is talking about in her rant – and she totally LIES about me. What IS it with these angry adoptees that they lie and twist things around?

so here is what she said, and I gotta say, as much as I tried to give Dana the benefit of the doubt and I tried to reach out – there are certain people that are just too dam stupid.

Dana says: I have had some creepy damn people stalking me because apparently, they had a bad situation in an adoption reunion with their lost sister, so now everybody around them is supposed to be pro-adoption, and all adoptees are crazy and it’s their fault, being crazy, that no one wants to open adoption records.

 I wound up friending back one of them recently because as a woman and thanks to marriage, she didn’t have the same last name as one of her sisters that I was already kind of avoiding, not appreciating the intrusion, so I was kind of blindsided. But she outed herself today, and in the process of being a royal bitch about it, too.

 Just in case any more of them are still on my friends list, because I friended someone else the same day I friended her, you can get lost. Your situation is NOT the norm, I am NOT going to legitimize your shitty attitude by being buds with you on the Internet, and basically you can fuck off.

 I don’t care how many adoptees are crazy now, I still want open records. It’s no wonder they’re crazy when they’ve been treated like shit their entire lives under the pretense that they were “saved” or some garbage. I’d be crazy too. It’s a miracle more of them aren’t.

oh and Dana – just because Joan was treated like shit by her adoptive parents does not give her the right to turn around and treat ME like shit, when all I ever did was be nice to her. So -fuck you Dana Seilhan.

1. gertmcqueen

gert here… hey…Dana did not HAVE to comment NEGATIVELY on MY article on Portrayal of Adoption. Her comments were very inflammatory and with intent to discredit ME and my position of my story…against the rules and regs that were set DOWN BY THE HOST OF THE SERIES.Many of Dana’s comments, as well as mine and Ruth’s, were deleted by the host…because of their negativity…BUT it was Dana who STARTED IT…that’s called a hit and run.

 2. Ruth

it was also hit and run when she ranted about me then unfriended and blocked me. – that was the coward’s way out. She insulted Gert and me AND our father, and when the heat got turned on her – she fucking ran AFTER slinging more insults. And nobody told her to be the first one to begin a dialogue with us. To be honest, my first impression of her was that she was a bimbo. I mean, what else would you call someone who suggested the solution my father should have taken is that of some single mothers who “dump their kids onto the older siblings of the family.” – which in our family, would have meant dumping a 3 month old infant onto a 9 year old child. Along with a 5 year old and a 3 year old. I responded by saying (not sure of my exact words) that DUMPING an infant onto someone else is the same as DUMPING an infant onto adoptive parents. Bimbo Dana’s solution is NO solution. But, as I said, I went to her facebook, and thought, “she doesn’t seem so bad.” Boy was I wrong. She is REALLY a bimbo of the highest degree. She gets a facebook friend request from someone she doesn’t know. Doesn’t recognize their name, even tho just 24 hours prior, she was engaging in slinging insults at that person. Doesn’t go to that person’s facebook page to check them out. Accepts a friend request from me without checking out my facebook page, which had on it, links to my then-latest blog post that had included in it’s title, the name of Joan Wheeler, whom Dana is familiar with. uh – Dana Seilhan – I tried to give you the benefit of the doubt – I thought I had labeled you a bimbo on a rash judgment. I tried to see the good in a fellow human being – but I take it all back – you ARE a bimbo of the highest degree.

3. Ruth

Dana dear, all I know is from what I have experienced – nutjobs like YOU that take things out of context – pass judgements on my father -who you never met, make like YOU know what was best for my family even tho you had NO facts about us.

readers – Dana’s alternative solution to my father’s giving Joan up for adoption – and she did write this to me and Gert in a comment to Gert’s article at the Chicago Now site – ‘dump the infant onto the older sibling.” – sure, DUMP a 3 month old infant onto a 9 year old child. – lesson for you dana – get the facts of a situation before giving a solution – f’ing bimbo.

4. Ruth

a note on being safe when receiving friend requests/sending friend requests on facebook. I have received many friend requests on facebook from people I don’t know. I NEVER automatically consent to be  fb friends with them. I ALWAYS check out their profile to see WHY they want to be friends with me. Usually it’s because they are fellow Star Trek, Lord of the Rings or other science fiction fans. Or a friend of one my friends. But I’ve gotten some that were a mystery. And with those – I ignore them. Dana was wrong to automatically consent to be my fb friend without checking me out first. Once she found out who I was, she was in her rights to unfriend me and even block me. She has no right to call me “creepy.” Oh well, that’s not the first thing she got wrong. Seems as tho she got a lot of things wrong. What I got wrong was thinking she was intelligent. – my bad.

The damage done by Joan Wheeler’s lies and why we work to correct that damage November 14, 2013

Posted by Ruth in Joan Wheeler's abuse and harassment of her birth family, Refuting Joan Wheelers statements.
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In my last post, written early this morning “Joan Wheeler keeps spreading the same tired lies about my father again.” I copy and pasted a comment that Joan wrote on this blog: http://danielibnzayd.wordpress.com/2013/11/07/does-anything-anyone-say-about-adoption-hurt-you-anymore/#comment-427.

Joan’s comment contained the same stupid lies concerning my father’s decision to relinquish her to adoption and in my post, I refute those lies. Also Gert and I deduced (correctly) that the owner of the blog, one Daniel ibn Zayd, will NOT post our comments refuting the lies that Joan keeps saying about OUR FATHER! Howver, another person named Deb had her simple comment approved for acceptance: “Beautifully stated Joan.”   Deb thinks she is giving Joan a compliment. Deb believes that Joan is telling the truth about MY father. Deb doesn’t realize that Joan is a lying bitch.

Deb thinks my father is shit. Deb thinks our parish priest, Fr. E. was shit. – Joan doesn’t name him, but at the time, that is who our pastor was. And Fr. E. was one of the kindest, gentlest men around. He baptized me, gave me my First Communion. I remember him very well. He became part of our family – he came to our house and adminstered the Last Rights to my grandmother in 1965.

So two good men have their reputations sullied – thanks to Joan and Deb thinks it is wonderful. Now you know why Gert and I have our blogs and refute EVERY lie that Joan tells.  ps – both these men are dead, and cannot defend themselves. So Gert and I do it for them – for their honor. We will not sit back and let Joan commit character assassination of two dead men. Joan has no shame.

1. gertmcqueen

Joan doesn’t care about damage to others…she is the only person that matters, period! She is nothing but trash and only can speak trash. Those that believe her do so at their own risk of being her next target…if you ever get on the wrong side of her…

lies, lies, and more lies – by Joan Wheeler – refuted as always by Ruth Sippel Pace November 14, 2013

Posted by Ruth in Joan Wheeler Speak - how Joan views the world, Joan Wheeler's abuse and harassment of her birth family, Refuting Joan Wheelers statements.
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In Gert’s latest blog post “Joan Wheeler’s screaming, that her birthsiblings are attacking her, is nothing new!” dated November 13, 2013, Gert details much bullying done by Joan towards us, her birthsisters. Her bullying rant against me contains lies (so what else is new?)I’m not going to go over all Joan’s bullshit, just a few points that I pointed out in 4 comments that I placed on Gert’s post:

Ruth‘s comments:

lie #1: “The last time you were told this in person was at our father’s 80th birthday. I out up with your antagonistic attitudes for the party for the father we share, but I warned you then”

no, we never spoke to each other at the party. When she was leaving, she turned to me as she was going out the door and said “Ruth, we need to talk.” I was sitting on the couch with my stepmother. We both looked at each and rolled our eyes. We said nothing to Joan. I didn’t even look back at her. Let’s see – who was at the party. – my father, who is now deceased. My stepmother. My two stepsisters, their husbands, their kids (5 in all) a few of the kids friends – I think maybe 4. Count them up: 5 adults that are still alive, and about 9 kids – ranging in ages 10 – 17. They are witnesses that Joan did NOT warn me about anything. They are witnesses that Joan and I did NOT speak. 

  • lie #2: “You violated an Order of Protection that I had out on you when you showed up at my house in 1993″

    nope – she moved out of the house on Saturday, July 31, 1993. We didn’t even get to court until August 9, 1993. And it was then the judge handed down the order of protection (over annoyance phone calls that I placed because I was pissed at Joan’s STEALING HUNDREDS OF $$$ FROM ME). Joan says in her book that the date I came to her house was August 1, 1993. I have posted on my blog a scan of the actual order of protection and the date it went into effect was August 9, 1993 and it expired February 9, 1994. It was for six months, yet Joan reports it as being for one year.

    lie #3: “You charged her (her mother) with child abuse of her grandchildren!”
    wrong – Joan herself placed the child abuse call posing as me. The call was that I was turning in my own fiance for having sex with Joan and her mother liked to watch. or something like that. Joan then wrote to the Department of Social Services in Albany NY and told them on August 9, 1993 that I was sentanced to six months probation. – wrong – it was the afore-mentioned order of protection that I was sentance to NOT probation. at least she got the date correct in her stupid lying letter
    lie #4:
  • I nver had a sexual or emotional affair with your boyfriend/husband! How dare you accuse me of such trash!”

    Joan likes to spread that around that I accused her of having an affair with John. Nope, I never said that. However, Joan wrote a letter to John in March 1995, sending it to his mother’s house and asked him if he was leaving me. (copy of this letter and envelope, in Joan’s handwriting is posted on my blog) — Also in 1999, she sent me a letter stating that John got the next door neighbor pregnant. and the house was vacant! Trash? oh, yes, there is a LOT of trash coming out of Joan’s mouth!

Joan Wheeler keeps spreading the same tired lies about my father again. November 14, 2013

Posted by Ruth in Joan Wheeler Speak - how Joan views the world, Joan Wheeler's abuse and harassment of her birth family, Refuting Joan Wheelers statements.
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on this  blog http://danielibnzayd.wordpress.com/2013/11/07/does-anything-anyone-say-about-adoption-hurt-you-anymore/#comment-427 Joan Wheeler (@forbiddenfamily) says:     November 13, 2013 at 10:18 pm   says:

I think that when people, the general public, adoptive parents in particular, call an adoptee’s other mother a “birthmother” this negates what she truly is: that adoptee’s mother. Having said that, I want to share that yes, I am still hurt by what others say about adoption. Beyond the hurt are the truths that are ignored. People continually use the words they hear in conversation, they inflict those words onto me. I correct them. No, I say, I do not have a “birthmother” or a “first mother”. My MOTHER died when I was an infant, I tell them. My MOTHER was replaced by another woman. And my FATHER was replaced by another man. These two people became my adoptive parents, and as such, they are the ones who deserve the adjective in front of the words “mother”, “father” and “parents”. These two people are my social parents. They are my legal parents, but the two people who sired and gave birth to me are my parents. Period. When I approach the topic in this way, in one-on-one conversation, with boots on the ground, I can tell you that people receiving my words are truly shocked into reality: this woman’s MOTHER died and that’s why she was adopted. The expressions on their faces tells me that they understand. They then say to me, “I’m so sorry for your loss. How tragic.” Yes. The death of my mother is tragic. And so is the punishment I received: removal from my family of birth because my father was too poor to keep me. And let me add another variable into the larger discourse: religion. A Catholic priest so compassionately reminded my father at my mother’s funeral that “the baby needs two parents” that my devout Catholic father followed exactly what his parish priest suggested. My grieving father relinquished his youngest child to a closed adoption because that was a better solution, better than asking for help to keep his family together, better than having his second wife take care of all of his children while he went to work. It must have killed him to come home each day to his older children, filled with grief and despair. He had kept his family together by getting married very soon after his first wife’s death, but at the cost of giving up his newborn daughter, a choice he told me decades later that he regretted. So, when people tell me their joys of adoption, I am hurt. And then I tell them what adoption did to me. My broken families are not the only truth I hit them with. I slam them with the truth that my real birth certificate is sealed and that every single adoptee in America is issued a falsified birth certificate. People are just not aware. … sorry for rambling. Just in a rush today.

I answered, but doubt that it will get posted, because all those angry adoptees all have their heads up their asses:

as usual, Joan gets the facts of what happened at my mom’s funeral wrong. I was only 3, but I heard from many relatives what happened. Including my own father. It is strange that Joan forgot to blast my mother’s sister here because it was she who suggested the adoption in the first place – because her childhood friend was the sister of the man who adopted Joan. It was my aunt Catherine who approached my father with the idea of adoption. My father then asked our parish priest for advice. It was not done at the funeral.

Also – my father was NOT poor. He worked for the City of Buffalo as a civil engineer. He worked in the Streets Paving Department drawing up blueprints and plans of the city’s streets. Joan routinely spins this web of lies and even goes around saying my father was a high school dropout. Which, actually was true – BUT she doesn’t say WHY! BECAUSE LIKE MANY OTHER YOUNG MEN AT THE TIME MY FATHER LEFT SCHOOL TO ENLIST IN THE ARMED FORCES TO FIGHT WORLD WAR II.

When the war was over, he went back and got his GED. He worked as a machinist in a bicycle repair shop and then went to night school for blueprint and draftsman. He was hired by the city of Buffalo in 1955 and worked there until he retired in 1988. Yes, my father married a second woman – so what? Lots of people get married. For the wrong reasons. So? Joan’s own marriage was hardly a work of bliss. Because my stepmother turned out to have mental problems, we remaining birth siblings and now two stepbrothers were placed in foster care on and off. After the death of his second wife, my father put a down payment on a house and gathered his kids from the foster homes. In 1965, as now, 4 teenagers and a mortgage can be really tough on the wallet. My father took a second job as a salesman at Sears. So? Lots of people work two jobs to help pay a mortgage and rear a bunch of teenagers. That hardly makes my dad “poor.”

In 1970, when I was 18, my father met and married another woman. She had two daughters and soon my brother came along. At which time, my stepmother resumed the career that she had before she had her two girls – working as a nurse’s aide. So? Lots of families have two incomes. Doesn’t make them “poor.” My father and stepmother liked to travel. Because my stepmother emigrated from France and relatives both in France and Greece, they traveled to Europe frequently. So? Lots of people travel the world.

Joan has a habit of pointing out other people’s income and tries to dictate to them how they should spend their money. She did it to me.  Joan and I had a joint checking account in 1989 to buy real estate. For the expenses of real estate brokers, lawyer fees etc. It was MY money – $4000.00 I put in. For real estate. Joan was dipping into it to fix her car. But her husband had a job. We dissolved the idea of buying real estate and after figuring out how much was used for legitimate reasons, I was shorted out hundreds of dollars – Joan took MY money – STOLE IT. A lawyer’s refund was being sent to us – split in half and Joan agreed since it was my money in the first place, when she got her check – she would give it to me. It was MY money after all. BUT when the time came – she said she was keeping it – MY money – to buy a xmas tree for her kids. I said Keep it – but I don’t want to see you again. Joan’s husband worked. Joan refused to get a job. Joan sees Ruth and her husband working. Ruth and her husband have no kids. Ruth and her husband can afford to buy Joan’s kids xmas. Really?

MY HUSBAND AND I WORK TO PAY OUR EXPENSES NOT ANYBODY ELSE’S. I DID NOT GIVE BIRTH TO JOAN’S KIDS AND WAS NOT RESPONSIBLE FOR THEM. This is how Joan’s mind works. go ahead and not post this – I’m putting it all on MY blog anyway. – but you adoptees all think another adoptee can do no wrong – but you are all hiding your heads in the sand when you take Joan’s words as gospel truth. On my blog – I post scans of actual documents that prove what I say. Joan just runs her mouth.

1. gertmcqueen

gert here…of course Daniel, author of the blog that Joan wrote lies about us, will not publish our comments…but it’s save to say that he at least read them! For a smart guy he is pretty dumb! These angry adoptees don’t care whether Joan lies or not…she’s good for their program against all things adoption. Joan’s their poster-child because she had such great tall tales of pain and suffering due to her being abused by adoptive parents…oh excuse me, according to Joan they are ‘social parents’…So these angry adoptees will just continue blindly agreeing with each other and ignoring the facts that are presented to them…for you see they are not interested in truth, only in the fact that they can continue to spread their form of venom and hate


exactly Gert – these hypocritical “angry adoptees” foam at the mouth when they demand THE TRUTH. That’s what they keep saying they want. They want THE TRUTH told about their birth certificates, their geneology, their birth families, their family medical backgrounds. That is reasonable, and they should receive those truths. However, THE TRUTH does not end there – because the birth family have their own truths and facts – Joan’s warped brain needs to lay BLAME on everyone – and I mean everyone in her birth and adoptive families for her wretched life. And there are lots of people out there who are so stupid, so brainless as to think that Joan doesn’t lie. They are worthless sheeple.

2ND edition of Forbidden Family? If it contains ONE lie, I’ll see you in court Joan Wheeler November 12, 2013

Posted by Ruth in Contradictions of Joan Wheeler, Joan Wheeler Speak - how Joan views the world, Joan Wheeler's abuse and harassment of her birth family, Lies in the book Forbidden Family, Refuting Joan Wheelers statements.
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In recent months, Joan Wheeler has been working on a “second edition” of her “autobiography” Forbidden Family.

The first edition was yanked from publication because of the serious LEGAL problems with it – slander and libel; unauthorized use of somebody’s picture. Her lame attempt to disguise my name, while publishing her own adoptive and birth name, my mother’s real name, my father’s real last name and publishing the name of a publication and an article (written by Joan in the early 1990’s) that had my real name in it. Much of the first chapter of her book was taken from this article.

Joan writes on her website that her book is “truthful.” Yet her book contains bold-faced lies. Lies that are proven as such by actual Buffalo City Court documents, and hand-written letters by Joan herself.

The court documents were sent to Trafford Publications and in May 2011, Trafford’s legal department ruled that Joan VIOLATED her contract with them: mainly that she said her “truthful” book was the truth and that she was the sole copyright of the book and all it’s content. Since my documentation proved she committed libel and used my photograph without my knowledge or consent, her book was pulled.

I cannot believe that Joan’s second edition will be an improvement. Because if she changes anything, it will contradict her statement that the first edition is “truthful.” Because the truth can NOT be changed. Anybody who thinks the truth is changeable is an out and out asshole.

Does Joan think her second book is going to pass my scrutiny? Because if I find even ONE lie in it about me, I will be suing her ass. And I will view any further lies as an act of harassment against me, and I will file harassment charges against her again.

And now I have a foot in the court door Joan – you may have gotten away with calling my job with false accusations about computer fraud because the judge basically pooh-poohed it. (July, 2013). But this time honey – the proof will be on the pages of your lying book. I WILL SEE YOU IN COURT JOAN WHEELER! AND THAT’S THE TRUTH.

1. gertmcqueen

gert here…and I SECOND this! Any and all materials that Joan Wheeler writes about OUR FAMILY will be looked at with a fine-tooth comb and magnifying glass! We OWN that first libelous book and we will OWN anything else that she writes that is not 100 percent truth…NOT HER VIEWPOINT but the truth. A person does not get the right to write anything, from their point of view, their feelings, etc, against REALITY AND TRUTH. so be VERY VERY CAREFUL JOAN WHEELER.

 2. Ruth

Joan certainly is a glutton for punishment. If she is looking for a beatdown, then she’s got it. And that is no threat to any physical beating – it is not a threat at all. It is a PROMISE – of a legal beat down and this time, I will sue her for everything she has – I will own her house. And once I do – I will evict her. She tried in the past to destroy my life – my career – my marriage – and she failed every time. She even failed in her last attempt to fuck me on my job – because stupid bitch forgot that my employer’s computer security team could check what I do. Her stupid and false accusation of computer fraud and misuse (November 2012) was checked and I was found innocent.

Make no mistake Joan – I own you. And you gave yourself to me with your ridiculous lies and schemes.

from facebook:

Gert Mcqueen – her sugar-daddy must have some kind of influence/$$ for her to think that she can get another book on us

Ruth Herr Sippel Pace – don’t know about that – all I can see is her fucking delusions surfacing again. SHE is going to put out HER book and to hell with us. That’s how she is thinking. But this is going to blow up in her face.

that book has nothing to do with adoption reform at all – her motive for it, was the intentional trashing of anyone in her life that ever pissed her off. Her continued attempts to fuck with me – calling my job repeatedly in 1994-95, calling child abuse on herself, posing as me, writing letters to John at his mom’s house telling him to leave me – are all indicative of this. She hates me and her book is nothing but a way to get at me. But she has failed and this is another example of her mental illness.

Gert Mcqueen – her delusions are surfacing because she’s got a sugar-daddy! personally I’m not too concerned about this cause I know that I’M NOT DONE EXPOSING EVERYTHING I have on her…in fact I got to finish up a draft to get it on the blog…tonight! She not only has delusions, she is delusional…NO PUBLISHER will print from her…and unless she’s willing to really self-publish it ain’t going to get done, but then again, if she did self-publish it…the range of media EXPOSURE from us will still do the same as we did already.

Ruth Herr Sippel Pace – exactly Gert – even if she cons another publisher, that publisher will hear from us – and the outcome will be the same as it was for the first book – the complete pulling of the book. Amazon.com already knows about the “problems” with this author – and any website that would carry it will be notified that the book is libelous. Any publisher will also be held liable by me for publishing any lie about me – I stand to make a lot in monetary damages.

Ruth Herr Sippel Pace  – as to the sugar daddy – I think he may be gone – because her attention seems to be focused on me and bitch Laura is feeding her shit. That’s all right. Laura is an ass – is inconsequential to me, and I dismiss that little child.

3. RuthNovember 12, 2013

I want to extend a hearty thank you to Joan – for her stupidly handing me this to me on a silver platter.
Joan, you foolish child – by calling my job in November 2012 with a false accusation of computer fraud/misuse, you gave me the opportunity to file charges on you.
The judge pooh-poohed it because he thought it was silly nonsense. However, the publication of a libelous book is a different matter.
Many people who put out libelous material get sued. Your continued lying about me will show the judge that you are, and have been engaged in a smear campaign against me and my reputation. Your admission to calling my job back in 1994-95 and the letter that I have that you wrote to Mr. Peter S. (then director of patient accounts) will show that you have indeed been engaged in a 20 year smear campaign against me.

The judge dismissed my charges against you in July 2013. BUT if you publish a book after that date, that contains lies about me, my lawyer and I will be able to show the judge that you are still harassing me in print.

Hold on your socks and pull!

Overthinking, imagining, speculating, fantasizing – then reporting those erroneous thoughts as fact – this is what Joan Wheeler does on a daily basis November 10, 2013

Posted by Ruth in Joan Wheeler Speak - how Joan views the world, Joan Wheeler's abuse and harassment of her birth family.
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This is what Joan Wheeler does – she overthinks, speculates, projects the way SHE would react to a problem onto others, imagines how that person would react, speculates on how that person thinks and acts, thereby creating a fantasy, then begins to actually believe that fantasy, then reports that fantasy as FACT. – Meanwhile, the person she has dreamed up this shit about hasn’t a clue as to what Joan is talking about, is pissed because now a lie is being told about them, calls Joan out on it, gets yelled at, phone slammed on them – and then the whole incident is reported as the other person has now “harassed” Joan and is “interfering with her life.” Joan then escalates the telling of her fantasy, now lying about the person, and the person is left wondering what the hell they did!

like the shit time I called her to tell her Aunt Doris died. (November 3, 2009) After reading email about it, I call my father. Joan should know, she was named after Aunt Doris. Did Dad still have Joan’s phone #? (because a few months prior he kicked her out of his house and life). Yes he did. He was tired. Should Ruth place call? Yes, says Dad. So she does –

Joan – how did you get this number?

Ruth – from Dad.

Joan – NOT a good idea.

Ruth – whatever, look, Aunt Doris died. We thought you should know.

Joan – thank you for that, but —-$%^$#@*&^^?)(&&%$$^ AND DON’T FUCKING CALL ME AGAIN.

Ruth slams phone down and bursts into tears. Goes to cousin Nancy’s house and Nancy calms her down. Then Ruth goes to Dad’s house, where dad says, “Joan is mentally ill.” meanwhile, Joan calls Town of Tonawanda police – Gert, Kathy and Ruth are calling her on the phone harassing her. on the spirit of my miscarried son, I swear this is what happened. – But Joan tells a completely different story. why? – cos she’s nuts. should be committed.

How does ONE phone call, placed by Ruth, get reported to the police that Ruth, Gert AND Kathy as placing phone calls to Joan? Go back to the beginning of this post and learn how Joan’s fucked up brain works, er, DOESN’T work. Because, just because Joan thinks something, that doesn’t make it true.

and by the way – the next day I called Gert, and then she called the Town of Tonawanda police. The officer placing the call to me the night previously had left his name on my answering machine, so Gert asked to speak to him personally. He told Gert: “don’t worry about her, we know all about her.” roflmao!

 1. gertmcqueen

Gert here…excellent post!! I hope the links I put here come in, if not just go to the date, August 18, 2011, on my blog and read them…they are ALL good examples of how Joan does this overthinking and imagining…it is HOW her brain works!

http:/gertmcqueen.wordpress.com/Joan Wheeler’s own behavior….exhibit A on August 18, 2011

http:/gertmcqueen.wordpress.com/Joan Wheeler’s own behavior….exhibit B on August 18, 2011

http:/gertmcqueen.wordpress.com/Joan Wheeler’s own behavior….exhibit C on August 18, 2011

UPDATE, FEBRUARY 2016, as older posts are being seen I’m updating with links to my second blog and a Facebook page wherein I expose AGAIN the lies, fabrications and hate that Joan M Wheeler says about me and family. After the first book was pulled from publication by the publisher, May 2011, she has ‘self-published’ another ‘revised’ version. In this ‘version’ called ‘duped by adoption’ she has increased her exploitation by including PICTURES and REAL NAMES and much more personal information violating again the families. Joan has no decency NOR shame. There is NOTHING in this book for adoption reform. She is totally against adoption and her two families. To learn more see…



Oh NO! Gert and I are collecting movies on DVD! Quick now, throw us in jail, Joan Wheeler! November 6, 2013

Posted by Ruth in Joan Wheeler Speak - how Joan views the world, Joan Wheeler's abuse and harassment of her birth family, Lies in the book Forbidden Family, Refuting Joan Wheelers statements.
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Oh NO! Gert and I are collecting movies on DVD! Quick now, throw us in jail, Joan Wheeler!

On page 302 of her filthy lying book, Joan Wheeler condemns me for “collecting movies.” She uses it in the context that because I didn’t have kids I was using my own money on other things. But she said it in a very rotten way. “It’s a good thing she didn’t have any children.”

Yes, at the time, I would go to the store and buy a pack of VCR tapes and tape movies off the TV. However, at that time, I had also acquired an adult dog- DOG, not cat, Joan. Her name was Brandy, three years old, a 65 pound Siberian Husky/Alaskan Malamute mix. We got her from some neighbor friends who were breaking up.

Despite my hobby of “collecting movies,” I spent over $100.00 on a dog house for my Brandy. I didn’t have a car at the time. I ordered it through the JC Penney catalog and had it delivered to my house – at extra cost for that delivery. It was so cute – a snap-together resin plastic dog house, terra cotta in color with a green roof – shaped like a log cabin with a slate roof.

Excuse me Joan – who the hell are YOU to make a comment on how I spend MY money? Money that I earn by busting my ass on something called A JOB! – Something YOU were too lazy to get. ALSO,  I showed that despite my hobby of collecting movies, I was a responsible dog parent in providing the best of care for her. I took better care of her than her previous owners, who fed her commercial food for pet rodents (hamster food) with kitchen grease poured on it. Within two months, Brandy’s coat thickened and shone right up. Other neighbors noticed it and complimented me. I also bought toys for her, she got the best medical care too when she needed it – she was up all the time on her shots.

O, but in September 1986 – Joan spent money on tickets to see The Monkees when they appeared in Buffalo. Never mind she had already seen them in July 1986. But she simply had to see them a second time. Then a week later, she’s on the phone with me, crying – her electricity was getting shut off. Now they don’t shut your electricity off unless you haven’t paid it for a few months. And here is Joan, with a one year old son at home, 8 months pregnant with her daughter – and instead of paying the electric bill to provide for her child(ren) she goes to a rock concert. AND HAS THE NERVE TO WRITE IN HER FILTHY BOOK THAT I WOULD NOT BE A GOOD PARENT BECAUSE I BOUGHT BLANK VCR TAPES??? TALK ABOUT A HYPOCRITICAL BITCH!

In 2001, when Peter Jackson’s film version of the first installment of The Lord of the Rings came out, I made the switch to DVDs. I picked up a good player and have been buying DVDs ever since. I have the complete TV series of Star Trek, (original), The Animated Series, and Enterprise. Missing only one of the movies, missing only one season of ST Voyager, and have two seasons of Deep Space Nine and three seasons of ST The Next Generation.

I also have the complete TV series of Superman, Remington Steele, The Flash, Alien Nation, Buck Rogers, Earth 2, and some of The West Wing, The Paper Chase, Hill Street Blues, Fame. And the first four seasons of Ghost Hunters. I also pre-ordered (and paid for) via one of the cast members – the last season of Ghost Hunters International, which will be autographed by a couple of the cast members.

I also have the mini series Roots, Roots 2, Brideshead Revisited, Shaka Zulu, Captains and the Kings, Cosmos, Centennial, Shogun, The First Churchills. And movies! – I have gotten lots of movies, and music DVDs. And even got a music DVD that I ordered thru and he autographed for me – from my long time crush Jon Anderson of Yes. And my husband John is building up his collection too!

Well, lately, since she is now retired, Gert has been collecting DVD movies. She always enjoyed watching Star Trek, but was busy with her kids to really sit down and watch it. She recently went out and got all three season of the original series and a set of all the Star Trek movies.

From yesterday (November 5, 2013) to this morning – we were having a conversation on facebook, concerning the new fan-made Star Trek series, “Star Trek Continues.” This most excellent series just wrapped up principal photography on their second episode. Their first episode “Pilgrim of Eternity” is available for viewing on youtube. It is very good. Gert was telling me that she wanted to get through the DVDs that she already bought before she got into this series.

My last comment in our conversation is here and sums up what I truly believe was (and is) Joan’s motive in constantly putting me down for MY own life and financial decisions – JEALOUSY, PURE JEALOUSY! She looks at me, even though I have my own day-to-day struggles, and sees that I have direction and meaning in my life. HER own life has no meaning or direction.

Here is my last comment to Gert on facebook:

“oh no! just thought of something! You and I are “collecting movies!” – Better hide that info from the Nameless One, lest she condemn us for it – as she condemned me for collecting movies (particularly horror) in her book. Seems to me she was letting her f’ing jealousy come out in that condemnation. SHE had no job (lazy ass), HER husband was not bringing in the $$$ like John was, John and I didn’t have kids to suck up all our $$$, so whatever John and I were using our own hard-earned $$$ was automatically condemned by her.”

1. gertmcqueen

yep Joan spend decades writing about what the birth sisters did or didn’t do…like she’s in our minds…I thought that Joan wrote/writes about HER ADOPTION so why is it that she KNOWS what is right/best/wrong with us or anyone else…Joan is just a little god looking for a following! Sorry I’m the star of MY MOVIE and no one gets to write lies about me and get away with it

 2. Ruth

oh absolutely Gert – that book has hardly ANY thing on her own life – but a lot of observations on OUR lives – particularly mine.

3. Ruth

Joan calls me Brenda in her book. Almost every other page is “BRENDA this, BRENDA that.” Was it a book for bitching about BRENDA (me) or a book about JOAN and her adoption.

4. Ruth

Oh – I just had a memory flash! Somewhere in her stupid book, and I don’t feel like looking for the exact page right now, Joan also condemned me for whining that I didn’t have my own computer with internet at home. NOPE, I never whined. I had told her in 2003/2004 that I did not have a computer at home and relied on public computers in libraries. I could not afford to buy a home computer because I was paying a mortgage. I was (and still am) a responsible property owner. The mortgage and taxes get paid first. Then the utilities, then the car note and car insurance and then credit card bills and other bills. Then come groceries, prescriptions, food and supplies for my cat, cleaning supplies and other household goods. After all of that – THEN I’ll pick up a DVD.

My mortgage was paid off in March 2006. In June 2006, I bought my first home computer, printer, and obtained internet service. John and I also got our first cell phones at that time. In 2009, our roof sprung a leak, and we needed a total tear-off and new roof. We financed a second mortgage to pay for the new roof. We also put on a new porch three years ago, we just replaced the storm windows in the front, and are doing interior work. In time, we will put on new siding.

My husband is retired now, but once a week, still goes into the Army/Navy Surplus Store to help out in the store, to keep active, and bring in a little extra cash. I still have my job, and we are both doing hands-on work on our house and property.

What anybody does with their own time, lives or money is nobody else’s damn business. For Joan to constantly be making comments on RUTH’S life, and RUTH’S possessions in her own book is a clear indication of what I said above – JOAN IS JEALOUS OF ME – pure and simple.

Joan Wheeler condemns people who adopt their grandchildren and raises them as their own children, yet stays good buddies with a woman who did exactly that. November 5, 2013

Posted by Ruth in Contradictions of Joan Wheeler, Joan Wheeler Speak - how Joan views the world, Joan Wheeler's abuse and harassment of her birth family, Refuting Joan Wheelers statements.
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In Gert’s new blogpost, “Joan Wheeler, angry adoptee, is a glutton for punishment, she seeks it out! Then whines when she’s called-out!” Gert outlines Joan Wheeler’s continued paranoia against us, and Joan’s accusations of harassment to her by us, when we are merely exercising our constiutional right of free speech to offer our opinion on any subject we want. It was in an internet article about a man who was adopted and raised by his grandparents, and passed off as the SON, not grandson of the adopters. And of course, Joan spoke out AGAINST that situation. To see the link to the original article go to Gert’s post.

I am not going to post Gert’s entire blogpost, only my comment to Gert’s post, because it is a blogpost in itself.


and speaking of attacks: Joan Wheeler actively engages in attacks on ME! A year ago, November 2012, I visited amazon.com – on my home computer in my home. I work the night shift – 7pm to 7am. On my nights off, I keep that same schedule. I go to bed at 6 or 7am. so if I’m posting somewhere on the internet at 4am, does not automatically mean I’m at work. BUT Joan, in a repeat of what she did to me in 1994-95, in trying to attack me and get me fired from my job – writes a letter to my job, accusing me of computer fraud and misuse. The letter arrived just after Thanksgiving, 2012. I wasn’t told about it until January 2013. In the meanwhile, my employer’s computer security team investigated me, and EXONERATED ME. However, Joan, in her stupidity, goes on the internet (Huffington.com) and admits to being the one who sent the letter. I immediately charged her with harassment. After several delays – we finally battled it out in court on July 23, 2013. Unfortunatly, the judge, as with so many other court officials, pooh-poohed the severity of my enduring 25 years of harassment from my own sister. They have the mindset that sister’s should get along. They have their heads up their asses and this is why some bullies get away with their shit year after year. We are all aware that mentally ill people have more rights then the rest of us, and my harassment charge was dismissed. But Joan LIED on the stand and I detail those lies in this post: “Joan Wheeler perjures herself TWICE on the stand today, July 23, 2013.” 

Now, a week before we went for that final court date, I was “followed” on facebook by a Thomas Heath – who after I investigated him, and outed him, UNfollowed and blocked me. Tom is the husband of a former cow-worker, Laura Heath, with whom I had a small spat with back in May 2010. Laura, being the little idiot that she is, runs immediately to Joan’s facebook page and becomes facebook friends with. Never mind that she never met Joan, and only knew of her thru my bitching about her and her now-dead lying book. (“The enemy of my enemy is my friend.”) In three years, I had barely thought of Laura, then all of a sudden her husband comes into my life – just a week before Joan and I go to court? And there’s evidence on Joan’s facebook page that Laura and Joan are planning on going out for coffee?

So when Joan herself is not actively attacking us, she lies to other people, whines to them, shed tears, that her rotten birth sisters, Ruth in particular, is HARASSING HER. And these stupid brainless people just melt at the sight of Joan’s tears and willingly go along with harassing me.

Brian Maloney for one. Actually threatens on HIS attack blog against us, to expose a dark dirty secret that I have. When he did that, I filed an extension harassment charge, in conjunction to the one I had going against Joan, but the judge (the same one who has been overseeing the case since January 2013) said that Joan was not responsible for Brian’s action and that I could pursue criminal charges against Brian on his own actions. When I informed Brian of this, via my blog, I told him that I will not be held to emotional blackmail and that if he knows my dark dirty secret to spit it out. BUT I warned him – the police and the courts will not look kindly on a strange man telling a woman’s secrets on the internet. What those secrets are, I don’t know. I don’t have any. Brian is a stranger to me because he never met me, nor spoken to me face-to-face, and relys only on Joan’s lies about me. And this my friends, is a continuing ATTACK of Joan – against me. Lies to a strange man and tells him Ruth’s “secrets” and then Ruth gets threathened with blackmail. Cries to Laura that Ruth is taking her to court and all of a sudden, Laura’s husband gets involved in Ruth’s life. Never mind that Ruth has never met Laura’s husband. see my blog post “I am outing Thomas D. Heath and Laura J. Stickney-Heath as stalkers and troublemakers.”

I’ve also been in facebook contact with Laura’s biological daughter, (a Native American) that she had before she married Tom. Tom adopted this girl when she was 4 years old. At the age of 7, Laura put her in a foster home. She herself had a daughter, and Laura got custody of that little girl, who Laura is now raising, keeping her away from the child’s real bio-mom, and is passing her off as her daughter, not her grand-daughter. And Joan is going out to coffee with Laura, plotting with Laura to attack Ruth, but Laura is doing the very same thing that Joan is speaking out against in this NPR article – people adopting their grandchildren and passing them off as their own children. AND Tom and Laura did the same thing that Gert and her second husband did – ADOPTED the stepchild/bio-child. Why does Joan condemn Gert for that in her book, but actively hangs out with Laura and Tom? Because we see that even Joan’s zealous hatred of anything regarding adoption and child trafficking goes out the window when it comes to attacking Ruth. HYPOCRITE – if you’re against adoption – then be against it – ALL THE WAY!

ps – how I got in contact with Laura’s daughter – because Laura and Tom are keeping J.’s daughter away from her – J. routinely googles Laura and Tom’s name – J. lives in another state and doesn’t even know where her 13 year old daughter lives. She came upon my blogpost two weeks ago, and sent me a facebook friend request. But I knew about J. three years ago – from J.’s myspace page – where she putting out messages – looking for her daughter.

How could you Joan, how could you? Be active friends with a woman (Laura) who keeps a child away from her own bio-mom? Isn’t that the crux of your hatred of adoption? ISN’T IT?

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