Tags: blaming people for your own mess, misery, whining
Interesting conversation on facebook this week – Joan and her buddy Dana –
Dana says she’s fat and therefore not a human being. Then she says she not self-sustainable. Joan chimes in that she also is not self-sustainable, then mouths nonsense about a woman she knew that had a happy marriage, two kids with one on the way and was heavy and happy.
I can’t put my finger on it, but the whole conversation seems -I don’t know, a self-defeatist attitude shoved on facebook so all can see what losers they think of themselves.
Dana says she’s fat, therefore she’s not a human being. Both her and Joan are not self-sustaining. They both seem to recognize that that is a problem. But neither one talks about solutions. Dana seems to be lamenting that she’s fat and broke. Joan offers no solutions to her buddy and laments that she too is broke. Then talks about another woman who is heavy and happy.
Misery loves company so they say. And this conversation bears that out. If I hadn’t seen this on the internet, I probably would had overheard this taking place in a bar – two down and out women, blubbering on about their “problems” and getting drunk. And neither one coming up with a solution or even bolstering each other’s self-esteem.
I don’t know anything about Dana’s personal life, but I know some of Joan’s – and she’s a frequent patron at bars. Well, that’s the lifestyle she chose. And if that’s the choices in life she makes, that’s up to her. And if she’s suffering – that’s her choice as well. – There is nothing in her life that is a result of ANYthing that I, or her other birth sisters “did” to her.
Joan loves to blame her miserable life on her birth sisters. And in particular, me. It’s always “Ruth did this and Ruth did that.”
Well, besides saying that Ruth did NOT do anything that Joan likes to accuse her of – what of it? Joan falsely accuses Ruth of driving past her house. – Let’s say I did drive past her house – how is that contributing to Joan’s lousy life?
Joan falsely accused Ruth of using her employer’s computers to go on the internet and visit Joan’s website – an accusation that was proven false – because my employer can trace every keystroke I do. So even I did use a hospital computer and visit Joan’s website – how would that contribute to Joan’s lousy life? – oh come on Joan – knock your shit off. I know for a fact that you read my blog – I still have my job, my house, my husband. I still got bills to pay, repairs to do in my house, etc. etc. etc. – In other words: I HAVE A LIFE AND I LIVE IT. I may bitch about Joan here on this blog, but I still live my life.
Joan has no life – her life consists of bitching and moaning about her lot in life – that she was adopted, that nobody understands her, her birth sisters don’t like her, her adopted parents lied to her and blah blah blah.
Gods, Joan, stuff it.
PS – thank you Gert for correcting my spelling mistake in the title of this post – I mixed up “their” and “there” – you know, I can’t be perfect all the time.
Learning how Joan Wheeler’s mind works, is a fascinating exercise! She objects strongly that she was lied to, but she thinks NOTHING about how she continuously lies! She does NOT allow anyone to have ‘their own view’ of anything. She is incapable of putting herself in the shoes of another. Her view is the only one that counts!
This post is about what she wrote on the public forum for Adult Adoptees Advocating for Change. The forum is no longer public because I have exposed so much of their negative attitudes. If people don’t want the world to see their words they should never be on any public forum. But, Joan was, still is, on public forums and she continues to lie.
Joan’s inner workings; she rails against injustices done to her but NEVER sees the injustices that she DOES to others. Here she is, as 1adoptee, addressing a quote…
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The “Truth” does not lie in the middle – the Truth is simply the Truth – a lesson for Joan Wheeler and her puppets (Laura Heath, Brian Maloney, Mara Rigge) April 12, 2014Posted by Ruth in Black and White Evidence of Joan Wheeler's Lies: Letters, Court Documents, Lessons in Life.
Tags: dishonesty, Disrespect, facts, harassment of an adoptee's birth family, LIBEL, Lies, Refuting Joan Wheelers statements, SLANDER, spreading untruths, stupidity, Truth
My facebook buddy, David Gerrold, wrote this this evening:
“The truth is not in the middle. The truth is where the truth is. Sometimes it’s not even between the two extremes. Sometimes it’s in another place entirely.
You can move the middle by stretching one side or the other, but the truth does not move when the middle does. People who say “the truth is somewhere in the middle” are admitting they’re too lazy to do their research.
And those who insist on moving the middle are admitting — if not to themselves — that their argument is flawed.”
And I wrote these two responses:
“I have to add that phrase “they’re too lazy to do their research” to those who say “there are two sides to every story.” – Not when the truth is the truth. for example, on my blog, I have posted actual court documents that tell the truth – which was not told in a libelous book that slammed my reputation – and I am continually amazed that the author’s supporters keep saying that the book was her side of the story. If her side of the story is completely different than actual court documents, then it is a lie, a fabrication, and certainly not the truth.
Little trivia like what shoes were worn, exact time, etc. is one thing, but when there are huge discrepencies in two people’s stories, and documented proof is provided, and a third person comes along and doesn’t even look at the proof, then declares that each person’s telling of the tale is their perception, I call that third person lazy.”
So any person who comes to me and tells me that Joan’s book is her perception of what happened is a damn fool. Joan blatantly changed facts around – and facts cannot be changed. She knows damn well that the order of protection she obtained against me in 1993 was for six months, yet she wrote in her book that it was for one year. And it is not the result of faulty memory – she wrote a letter to New York State officials in December 1994 and told them I was sentenced to six months probation. Which I was not – the actual court documents are available on this blog – anyone who fails to do their research and has the nerve to tell ME the FACTS of what I lived through, is a fool. I have in my possession the actual court documents, and I have scanned them on this blog – and they prove that Joan Wheeler is a liar.
Go to this post “here are the court documents that prove that Joan Wheeler is a liar – January 17, 2013 ” to see the court documents that I am talking about – if you are too lazy to go look at them, I have to wonder what kind of fool you are – and what kind of brainless idiot you are that you refuse to even consider that your little buddy Joan Wheeler is a liar and that I, her rotten birth sister just may be telling the truth. You just don’t want to admit that you backed the wrong horse and were made a fool of. That’s your problem, not mine.
I posted this as my status on facebook a short while ago –
I got a facebook message the other day – it appeared in my “other” folder in messages – from someone I don’t know. I was comparing notes with another fb friend, who was also contacted by this person. I think I caught the person messaging me in a lie – I copied and pasted to notebook a statement from what she sent me, and copied and pasted a statement from what she sent my friend. And the two didn’t quite add up. It might have been a lie, or a typo on her part.
I wanted to send my thoughts on that (lie or typo) to my friend and accidentally sent it to the person that messaged me and my friend.
I don’t like to piss people off for no reason – but the internet can be a scary place – you don’t know who is at the other end of the internet – I check on people who I don’t know who send me friend requests or messages out of the blue.
I’ve also been known to send friend requests to people who I need to check out – to be able TO CHECK THEM OUT. I am open and honest about things – but sadly, not everyone is.
And when I find out that the person who I’ve been conversing with has not been honest, I will defriend them. If they disrespect me – I will block them.
If you contact me first, expect to be scrutinized. On the other hand, I would expect, and would not be insulted, if someone scrutinized me.
What does #JoanWheeler know about CHIFF? Nothing! She is NOT a adoption reformer, she’s totally ANTI-ADOPTION. April 5, 2014Posted by gertmcqueen in Uncategorized.
Yep, Joan is off and running her mouth, at full speed, over something she doesn’t have a clue about and she’s an annoyance to others, including fellow adoptees and reformers.
Joan can not call herself an adoption reformer, when her position is a non-negotiable position! She wants to ABOLISH adoption (in any form) like in BAN it all together, globally. And she’ll take her position to the adoption conference in CA. I hope more reasonable minds see her foam at the mouth in her hatred. There is no avenue for dialog with Joan…NONE. She will never give a millimeter of an inch! I hope that the real professionals at the conference put her in her place. Joan is a huge mill-stone around the necks of REAL people trying to reform something.
Now for a bit of background, for myself and readers, I present two links and one paragraph of what…
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How many times does #JoanWheeler need to be hit over the head before she learns anything? April 5, 2014Posted by gertmcqueen in Uncategorized.
She really must be into self-torment and pain on top of that delusional self-importance. She seems to believe that HER life story will SAVE the world from the horrors of ADOPTION.
Joan has been promoting herself as a ‘writer’ and a ‘social worker’ all over the place. Oh sure she has a degree in social work, but she’s never had a job as such. And yes, she has written articles and opinion pieces AND A LIBELOUS BOOK! Seems to me she ought to pick a different career choice. I don’t see where, in the most recent published books of adoptee’s stories, written by adoptees, that Joan has a contributing essay! She DOESN’T! Even adoptees are distancing themselves from her. I have had communication with a ‘elder’ in the reform movement who keeps silent whenever Joan approaches her and has NO INTENTION of getting involved with Joan…but…Joan is so into herself…
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