how many titles does JOAN M WHEELER need to let her lousy life story September 2, 2016Posted by gertmcqueen in Uncategorized.
Tags: abuse, adoption reunion, cowardice, duped by adoption, too many titles
and while she’s at telling her life story she slanders and libels every member of TWO FAMILIES.
reworking and reposting of a 2-part BOOK POST Chapter 15 of Joan Wheeler’s libelous book February 21, 2013Posted by gertmcqueen in Uncategorized.
Tags: abuse, being downright nasty, blaming people for your own mess, bullying, contradictions, cowardice, false accusations, harassment of an adoptee's birth family, Refuting Joan Wheelers statements, whining
these posts are on Gert’s blog…
- Narcissitic psychodrama of Joan Wheeler, part 2, a book post on February 21, 2013
Lies, smugness, arrogance – the very reasons why Joan Wheeler’s birth family doesn’t want her around them February 19, 2013Posted by Ruth in Joan Wheeler Speak - how Joan views the world, Joan Wheeler's abuse and harassment of her birth family, Refuting Joan Wheelers statements, Uncategorized.
Tags: abuse, being downright nasty, blaming people for your own mess, bullying, contradictions, cowardice, dishonesty, Disrespect, embellishing the truth, false accusations, harassment, LIBEL, Lies, passing assumptions off as truth, SLANDER, spreading untruths, stupidity
The other day, February 16, I posted another reply to Joan Wheeler on The Huffington Post where she admitted on January 22 to the recent (Nov. 2012) harassment/stalking crime of contacting my employer with a false accusation. To see all her comments and all my replys to her in one spot click HERE.
Gert had checked the Huffington page today (February 19, and saw my comment had been approved for posting and we had this little exchange on facebook:
Gert McQueen:I checked this out again last night and it is a very good feeling that Huffington keeps allowing your posts, even after a month! The moderators obviously have SEEN the truth in what you have to say in response to what obviously are lies that JW has said…RIGHT ON
Ruth Herr Sippel Pace: like I said on the phone -I believe that a moderator at Huffington has left the exchange there as a classic case of what NOT to say on the internet (Joan’s comments) and that there can and will be repurcussions (my taking her to task online on Huff and filing criminal charges against her).
Gert Mcqueen: her arrogance as well as her lies just caught up with her, now she does have to pay the piper for the song and dance that she’s been playing on ALL THE FAMILY’S backs!
Ruth Herr Sippel Pace: “her arrogance” – yes – it isn’t just the lies and the harassments, the dirty deeds, it’s her f’ing smugness at times – which tells me she knows EXACTLY what she is doing. Like the time in 1995 when the judge dismissed my charges against her, and FJM and I were coming down the escalator – Joan looked up at me – dead in the eye – and SMIRKED at me. FJM went running down the escalator saying she was going to wipe that smirk off Joan’s face. The smirk left Joan’s face and she went white. She knew what she did and was scared she was going to get her ass beat. She should be thanking me for stopping FJM when I did. I saved Joan from a real ass-beating.
Okay, Ruth here – now I’m not promoting violence. I’m not a violent person. But geez, sometimes I want to just reach out give somebody a good slap right across the chops! But I recognize the consequences of my actions. It isn’t right to put your hands on another person. No matter how much you want to or fantasize or joke about it. When my friend went running down the escalator, I ran after her and stopped her. I told her something and I will post it right here:
“Let her go. She’s not worth you getting into trouble for. One day her crap is going to catch up with her.”
Well, looks like my prediction is coming to fruition. You really do reap what you sow. Joan sowed a LOT of rotten seeds. She is now reaping the harvest of what SHE did. Not Ruth, not Gert, not anybody else. It was Joan herself who CHOSE to contact my job back in 1994-95 with false accusations of computer fraud. It was Joan herself who CHOSE to write harassing lying letters to me, to elected officials. It was Joan herself who CHOSE to write lies in her book – lies that were so flagrant and in direct contradiction of actual court and police documents.
And what is the result? Joan’s lies are coming to light. Her credibilty is shot. oh, too bad. I’ve been saying for three years now, via this blog, that Joan needs to tell the TRUTH. But she keeps chosing to lie. She did it again in November 2012, by contacting my employer with a lie. Then her smug arrogance kicked in and she boasted about it on public internet. And now she pays the piper.
lol, we hear about this stuff all the time on the nightly news. A crime is committed. The police have a suspect, but can’t quite prove it. Or they might not have a suspect. One day, an inmate steps forward and tells the cops “my cellmate was bragging how he/she did this or that.” And BINGO – the crime is now linked to a suspect!
Joan never learns. Because she is so arrogant she thinks she doesn’t HAVE to learn anything. She thinks she can walk her arrogant little ass around MY rights.
She will learn someday. And the learning is not going to be very pretty. And when the ugly truth comes up and slaps her in the face, I will not be extending one ounce of sympathy – because she is bringing everything down upon herself, by herself.
We always have a choice, regardless of circumstances. Although for the life of me, I can’t figure out what “circumstance” there could have been for Joan to LIE about me, STEAL from me, call my job to get me fired, write me a letter falsely saying that my fiance got the next door neighbor pregnant (when the house was vacant). Well, as I said above, it was JOAN who chose to do those things. Nobody forced her to them. Now she reaps what she has sown.
Gert here…and what made her THINK that it was perfectly okay for her to mess with my children and my ADOPTION process? And all the other dirty deeds and words said about me? And then, NOT answer the direct question by me to her on a public forum? Her answer was to ran to Huffington and complaint about me! Typical Joan response to her VICTIMS…scream that they are harassing her! Doesn’t work any longer. Everyone is watching!
RE: Joan Wheeler (Forbidden Family) – The Truth is Out There. And we have brought it forth. August 31, 2012Posted by Ruth in Joan Wheeler's abuse and harassment of her birth family.
Tags: abuse, being downright nasty, bullying, cowardice, cyberbullying, Disrespect, embellishing the truth, false accusations, First Amendment: Free Speech, harassment, LIBEL, Lies, Refuting Joan Wheelers statements, SLANDER, spreading untruths, stupidity
We have used actual court documents that prove the truth.
NOTE see end of this post for update
We have used actual handwritten letters – written by Joan Wheeler herself.
These documents have been scanned and posted on this blog.
They are undeniable.
Who so ever denies the truth that is revealed by these documents is an idiot.
How does one explain the discrepency between what is written in a libelous book and websites, and an actual Buffalo City Court document? If the person REFUSES to explain the difference, yet continues to scream and rant that the libelous book told the truth – that person cannot be called rational. If their friend takes the same postion and performs the same actions (refusing to explain the difference, and continues to promote a proven lie as truth), that person is also NOT RATIONAL.
Two plus two equals 4. That is the Truth. No amount of neurotic attempts to change it to equal 5 will ever work. Facts are facts.
Joan Wheeler lied in her book Forbidden Family. I have posted actual Buffalo City Court documents on this blog that irrefutibly proves this. No amount of neurotic attempts to change it will succeed.
Also: anybody who says it is Joan Wheeler’s “point of view” that certain things happened the way she reports in her book, is also being irrational.
Again, 2 + 2 equals 4. That is a FACT! Having a “point of view” that 2 plus 2 equals 5 is erroneous, delusional and irrational.
Having a point of view that an order of protection was for the duration of one year, when in reality it was for six months, is erroneous, delusional and irrational. Refusing to acknowledge the actual Buffalo City Court document that states a judges decree of SIX MONTHS, is erroneous, delusional and irrational. To keep insisting that such order of protection was for one year, is the sign of an irrational lie. For a friend to keep insisting that Joan is NOT lying, is a sign that that friend is also irrational. For the friend to REFUSE to also acknowledge an actual document from a City of Buffalo Court, and signed by a City Court Judge shows us that that friend is indeed irrational. Further, for the friend to state that I, who was the recepient of court order, and who scanned the document and posted it to this blog, has mental problmes because I am presenting the cold hard facts, shows us that this friend is the one with mental problems. Because I have only presented a court document. If I, Ruth, have mental problems because I believe what is written on the court document, then the entire judicial system in the city of Buffalo is also flawed, the prosecuters, lawyers, clerks, warrant officers, bailiffs and judges all have mental problems. This is a clear sign of irrationality for ANYone, be it a personal friend of Joan Wheeler or internet supporters. If ANYone says that an actual court document is NOT the truth, but the irrational claims of a person who readily admits that she is having mental problems and has been in therapy for more 30 years, IS the truth (or her point of view) shows that they themselves are NOT rational.
The Truth WAS out there – it is now here – on this blog, on my sister Gert’s blog. No amount of irrational ranting by Joan Wheeler or her buddy Brian T. Maloney will change that. No amount of harassing bullying and name calling and judgments on my life, my career, my personal choices in food, entertainment, or recreational activities will ever change me, or my mission:
TO TAKE A LIE THAT JOAN WHEELER HAS PUT FORTH IN HER BOOK, REFUTE THAT LIE, AND PLACE IT ON THIS BLOG.
UPDATE MAY 2016; as older posts are being seen I’m updating with links to my second blog and a Facebook page wherein I expose AGAIN the lies, fabrications and hate that Joan M Wheeler says about me and family. After the first book was pulled from publication by the publisher, May 2011, she has ‘self-published’ another ‘revised’ version. This woman has no shame no sense of family honor!
ACTIONS SPEAK LOUDER THAN WORDS – are you listening Joan Wheeler? Are you listening Brian Maloney? August 29, 2012Posted by Ruth in Contradictions of Joan Wheeler, Joan Wheeler Speak - how Joan views the world, Joan Wheeler's abuse and harassment of her birth family.
Tags: abuse, bullying, contradictions, cowardice, dishonesty, hypocrites, LIBEL, Lies, Refuting Joan Wheelers statements, SLANDER, stupidity
A five year old girl was beaten to death in Niagara Falls the other day, by a 16 year old punk – I attended a candlelight vigil held for her Tuesday night, August 28. I wrote a poem for Isabella and included it in my report of the vigil in this post: candle light vigil for a little girl held in Cheektowaga, Tuesday night, August 28, 2012
What I want to know is – WHY WEREN’T JOAN WHEELER OR BRIAN MALONEY THERE AT THE VIGIL? After all, Joan is always spouting about the rights of children – WHY WEREN’T YOU AT A VIGIL FOR A 5 YEAR OLD GIRL WHO WAS MURDERED JOAN? – oh, she wasn’t “adopted” so her rights don’t count. You’re always bitching about abused children – and here was an child who was abused to the point of death. Where’s your outrage? – Where is your sense of REVERENCE FOR LIFE? as Dr. Albert Schweitzer said. No, you go and say that people who adopt should all be shot. Always bitching about the rights of Native Americans, you want to change society, blah, blah, blah, but what do you do in your book? Condemn me and mock me for my infertility, my miscarriage and my neighborhood activism. – see I don’t just go on the internet and yak about society’s ills – I WALK MY TALK! I worked with my local councilmen, I started up a block club – I got out there and organized a Street Clean-Up. I started a petition in the early 90’s for rodent control and worked to get those blue totes that cut down on the rodents. What do YOU do Joan? NOTHING – JUST RUN YOUR RIDICULOUS HYPOCRITICAL MOUTH!
Brian is boasting that he is a Reiki “master” and healer. WHY WEREN’T YOU AT A VIGIL FOR A LITTLE GIRL WHO’S LIFELIGHT WAS TAKEN FROM HER BRIAN? Aren’t you supposed to be some sort of “New Agey” Master? and a healer? Why didn’t you bring your healing to the vigil? mmmm? Were you busy late Tuesday evening with some sort of healing? Oh no – you were too busy writing another comment trashing me on the internet. You have time for that, but not for a real incident of HEALING! You are a hypocrite – just like your little buddy Joan – you can talk shit, but you can’t heal – now you say you wanted to bring peace to my family – even though we didn’t ask for you – – but your healing ain’t working pal. best you be on your way – cos you ain’t changing me no time soon. And I never will change – I don’t want Joan in my life she is not a legal member of my family – I will continue to expose her lies on this blog – with the court documents and her own handwritten letters that show she is a liar. yak yak yak – that’s all you two pathetic little weasels can do. But when it comes time for action – when the community needs our collective healing – you just sit at your computer keyboards and trashtalk people. what pathetic losers!
Tags: abuse, Arthur J. Maloney, being downright nasty, brian maloney, Brian T. Maloney, Brian T. Maloney LION, bullying, cowardice, cyberbullying, dishonesty, Disrespect, embellishing the truth, emotional abuse, emotional blackmail, false accusations, gossip, harassment, harassment of an adoptee's birth family, Joan Wheeler's puppet, Lies, manipulation, misrepresenting one's credentials, passing assumptions off as truth, spreading untruths, stupidity
Final Notice to Brian T. Maloney (LION) of Williamsville, puppet of Joan Wheeler
Brian, the following blog posts are all about you. Until you remove that abusive blog you have against us and offer a public apology to us for sticking your nose where it don’t belong – in MY family’s business and trashing my father after he was dead – these blog posts will remain in existence for all the world to see.
What you need to do is delete ALL posts from your blog – and leave ONE post up recanting all the abuse you heaped on me and Gert – particularly where you called us dogs. And don’t try to squirm your way out of it by saying you were quoting an old adage – “if you lay down with dogs, expect to catch fleas.” – This was directed to a person who supports our blogs and left a comment on your blog. So, no, you didn’t come right out and SAY Gert and me were dogs – but by telling Paula that she was associating with us, she would catch fleas – in essence you WERE calling us dogs. And that doubles your mistake – you not only called women you never met – dogs – but then tried to twist your words and tried to LIE your way out of it. – That doesn’t go very well with your Reiki healing.
Also, you need to change the name of your blog from “Defending Joan Wheeler” to “No longer defending Joan Wheeler.” And in that one post you keep up on your blog you tell WHY you no longer are defending her – because once she found out in November 2011 just who your father was and how your father was the lawyer who handled my father’s adoption of his stepdaughter, Joan kept that from you and whined at you and got you to do her dirty work. She played you for a fool – as a revenge at that dirty lawyer who handled my stepsister’s adoption.
Admit your mistake Brian. But I know you won’t. Because it takes a big man, a big person to admit when they’re wrong. And you are no man. You are a wimp, a coward and a creep.
So here are some blog posts about Brian T. Maloney. and before anybody takes me to task for writing so much about this creep – remember – I knew his father, his father was a long time attorney and friend of my father and stepmother. In representing my family, I left a condolence message on an online memorial guest book when Brian’s father, Arthur J. Maloney died on November 16, 2011. I never met Brian. I don’t know him. But one month after his father died, Brian started cyber stalking and cyber-harassing and cyber-bullying me and Gert. He should have minded his own business. He brought this on himself.
Brian T. Maloney has been exposed in a new comment that I placed on that Buffalo News article by Joan Wheeler (with a screenshot of his blog – proving how he abused and bullied us)
Brian T. Maloney is concerned for my health. aw gee. (my rebuttal after Brian insinuates that I am on psych meds – which I am not, never have been and don’t need to. Another example of his abuse of me.
Brian T. Maloney can’t do any Reiki healing on anyone – because he’s a damaged individual in need of healing himself. – with graphics from Linkedin where Joan and Brian recomended each other on November 11, 2011.
Brian T. Maloney abuses someone who HONORED his father, Arthur J. Maloney – because Joan Wheeler told him to. (with screenshot of Arthur’s obit and my name from the guest book)
Guest post from Gert’s daughter Karen with update from Gert – Karen lets Brian have it for calling her mom and aunt dogs.
Chimp aka Brian T. Maloney continues to show the world what a disgusting moron he is – with graphics proving that he listened to lying gossip from Joan about someone I didn’t get along with back in the late 1970’s. – And she sent me a get well card in 1985. I post the card in this post.
Tags: abuse, being downright nasty, blaming people for your own mess, bullying, cowardice, cyberbullying, dishonesty, Disrespect, Dr. Rene Hoksbergen, false accusations, Lies, Refuting Joan Wheelers statements, SLANDER, spreading untruths
this is a different sort of post – during a facebook conversation with Gert and me and a couple of our cousins, the question was asked what did Joan Wheeler do to piss off the members of the family of our mom’s sister.
Part 1 She started with Gail because Gail had grown up with Helen Connors’ daughters – Nancy, Fran and Annie – Helen was the childhood friend of Aunt Catherine and the brother of Edward Wheeler. Joan remembered the Crystal Beach incident when she and Gail were 10 years and they bumped into each other – Gertrude Anetrino – another of Edward Wheeler’s sisters – lived on Sumner St – right around the corner from Bailey and Walden – right where Scheu Park is – where grandpa Jacob Herr and the family lived. – and not far from where I live now.
They used to have nieghborhood days at Crystal Beach – you pre-bought some ride and meal tickets at neighborhood stores for a savings. So in 1966, Gertrude and Helen and all their kids went for Bailey and Walden Day and coincidentally Aunt Catherine went with Ida, Norman and Gail. I don’t know who the adults Aunt Catherine went with, as she didn’t drive. Aunt Catherine and Gail bumped into Dorothy Wheeler and Joan – Gail saw Joan and was confused because she thought it was me, but then it wasn’t. Catherine told her later never to tell me or anyone she saw that girl. Gail then saw Joan’s Holy Communion picture and remembered the kid at Crystal Beach. I don’t know when in Gail’s life she became aware that we Sippels had another sister, but in 1974 when we found her, she told me didn’t like having to lie to me. – this is the one of the “lies” of adoption that Joan is always bitching about – but then she twists things around and in the book BLAMES Gail for not telling her about herself – like – wtf – Gail was a 10 year old kid and didn’t know anything!
Part 2. During the 1970’s me, Joan and Gail would go out discoing and bar-hopping. but Gail never really liked Joan. She sensed from the get-go that Joan was wierd. At her wedding shower (1980), we were having dinner and Nancy and Fran started talking about Joan, and Helen kicked one of them under the table “don’t talk about people behind their back.” I don’t remember which one but they said, “mom, we’re talking about Joan.” – because Nancy, Fran, and Annie grew up with Joan – they knew how wierd she was – apparently she had been wierd all her life. The early 80’s – Gail was busy with her own life as a newlywed and trying to get pregnant. At the same time I was trying to get pregnant. And in 1980, I went back to working the night shift. Neither Gail nor me had much time to spend on Joan. And of course, then we had the troubles with Karen. – Joan felt that Gail was “avoiding her” because the Wheeler cousins were badmouthing her. – but a lot of it was due to what she did to you Gert in 1982. Aunt Catherine was very upset over the whole thing. By the time we had the Herr family reunion at Uncle Mikes house in 1985, EVERYBODY was starting to see Joan for the nut she was and knew what she did to you Gert and were starting to distance themselves from her.
Part 3 – In 1993, Joan’s daughter got sick and this was after Joan stole that money from me and she knew she couldn’t ask me for any family medical history on thyroid problems, so she photocopied a bunch of medical stuff about Cathy and mailed them to Gail. Gail was pissed at her for what she did to me and sent them back to her. Joan waited until after 10 at night and called her on the phone and was screaming at Gail on the answering machine. Kevin wanted to get up and bitch her out, but Gail told him to just ignore her. From time to time, Joan would mail shit to Gail but Gail would always just mark the envelope “return to sender.” which was pissing Joan off even more. By 1994 when Joan ramped up her harassment to me, I sort of withdrew from everybody – and Gail purposely did not call me – because she wanted to prove to everyone that it was not Ruth doing all the trouble at one point Gail called our father up and told him “its not Ruth – it’s Joan.” Joan was now living back with her mother – with no job, kids either in school or day camp (did she ever parent them?) and she had all sorts of time to write letters to me and Gail. I couldn’t get the dam Buffalo Police to listen to me. But in the town of Eden – it was a different story. I don’t remember when – it had to be late 1998 when Joan sent her another letter – and Gail finally went to the police and they sent Joan a letter to tell her to stop contacting Gail – and it was at this time, Gail was battling cancer. When she got the last letter in 1999, she took it right to the police and they called Joan and said “did you send this letter to Mrs. B.? and Joan said yes. “after we told not to contact her?” she said yes. it was the Eden police who started the harassment charge against Joan. – I didn’t know any of this until John and I got married. I didn’t even know Gail and Kevin got divorced. and I am STILL upset that during the last years of her life, Gail purposely did not call me – to protect me – to prove that it wasnt me doing the shit.
Part 4 I can’t remember the exact year – but Joan had a crack in her windshield – and she went to get it fixed and the mechanic was Ray III – Bugsy’s son. Somehow the two got to talking and found out they were cousins. Ray was nice enough to invite Joan home for dinner. When Gail found out – she told him to leave her alone because she was dangerous. I don’t know what she told him. He started distancing himself from her, and she kept trying to call him. This had to be the late 90’s during the height of her letter writing to lots of people. (my job, the mayor, even Jessica, the 17 year old daughter of Nancy -and Jessica had nothing to do with the family drama! – she was bitching out Jessica and Nancy got her on the phone and told Joan the police would be called if she bothered her daughter again). — I don’t have the letter anymore – but I did get one letter that accused me, my friend Francine, Gail and Ray of “plotting against her.” – I called Francine up and she came over for lunch and then I read the letter to her. she started choking on her sandwich and then said “but but, I never met your cousin Ray.” – Joan in retaliation for this “plot” called Ray’s job to say he fucked up the windshield – trying to get him in trouble on his job. — like she was doing to me at my job.
Part 5 – Joan also managed to get Uncle Mattie’s daughter (I can’t remember her name) and Aunt Bertha’s kids Dennis and Becky mad at her as well. – Because she has such a lovely way to relate to people.
and with all this shit going on – for more than 25 years and the courts and the district attorney and the police – if Joan goes off the deep end like that nut in colorado – I will hold the authorities responsible – because they have had plenty of notice about this sick bitch.
And that’s also why I sent that letter to Buffalo area therapist Nicole Urdang, who supposedly read Joan’s book and left a book review on amazon.com saying it was a good book. This was a few months after Congresswoman Gabby Giffords was shot. And I told Urdang that she didn’t see the contradictions that Joan made in the book – and that Urdang was a poor therapist because she didn’t recognize that the book is not about adoption reform but a chronicle of a woman losing her sanity. and I told Urdang that she is responsible for egging Joan on. As well as Rene Hoksbergen, Lori Corangelo, Russell Thomas, Susan Thompson Underdahl and recently Brian T. Maloney.
I forgot to mention a name on the list of people that I will hold responsible if Joan Wheeler goes off the deep end.- Buffalo City Court Judge Margaret Anderson.
In 1995 I took Joan to court for harassment because of:
Sometime in 1994 Joan’s hospital bill got mixed up with another patient. Joan ASSUMED I did it and called my job. They investigated and found me innocent. They told Joan this. I work as a nurse’s aide, since 1972. Joan puts in her book that I work as a billing clerk to lend credence to this bullshit. The computers on the nursing station are not connected to the billing computers. The mistake was traced to a typo made at 4pm. I worked at that time 11pm to 7am. Not to mention the fact that they can trace everything you do on the computer. But Joan KNEW I did, even though she was told I didn’t. So she set out to change the facts. To change history. She called my job repeatedly for six months trying to get me fired. This is a hospital for god’s sake and we have better things to do than put with a lunatic! Like taking care of sick people and saving lives!
In December 1994, Joan called child abuse on herself, posing as me, She then wrote to Albany NY and told the Child Abuse authorities that I had been placed on probation due to annoyance phone calls. No, it was a six-month order of protection. In February 1995, I received a packet in the mail – from Joan – it contained photocopies of letters she had been writing to: Erie County District Attorney Kevin Dillon, Erie County Commissioner of Social Services Deborah Merrifield, NYS Senator Anthony Nanula, Buffalo Mayor Anthony Masiello, and the Patient Finacial Services Director of my employer. All these letter contained false accusations of me, and telling these elected officials and people at my job that I can’t pregnant, I hate her because she has kids, I hate her because she killed my mom. I’m not married but I’m living a man who’s not the same race as me. I have an arrest record, I am a criminal. AND she wrote letters to my fiance telling him to break up with me. She contacted my future mother in law, trying to tell her I was evil.
So I took all those letters, including the ones to my fiance and his mother and filed harassment charges on her. At one point while I was standing in front of Judge Margaret Anderson, she was looking at the letters and picked one up, turned to the person standing to her right, and said “she wrote to Kevin?” (the district attorney Kevin Dillon). And she was laughing. A judge was laughing at the clear stalking and harassing letters that Joan had written about me. She then dismissed my harassment charges saying: “sisters should get along.”
Oh thank you very much Judge Margaret Anderson – you have clear evidence of someone stalking me, harassing me, writing letters of character assassination, and you dismissed it all. YOU enabled Joan Wheeler to continue to harass me up to the present.
YOU put it in Joan’s sick head that she could harass me and get away with it.
Through the years, when I have told the story of this and showed those letters to people, they were shocked that a city court judge saw all the clear evidence and dismissed it. And we all have one name for that judge and it ain’t very pretty!
- 1. Ruth
AND in November 2009, when I called Joan on the phone to tell her that our Aunt Doris died, she started screaming at me – hurling obscenities at me – I got in my car and went to my cousin Nancy’s house and she calmed down – all I did was make a legitmate phone call, – that even after all the harasment that Joan did to me, that I, her sister, would take the time to tell Joan that the woman she was originally named for (Doris) had passed. What did I get in return? I got hit with a barrage of verbal abuse!
After I left Nancy’s house, I went to my dad’s – where he got a screaming phone call from Joan. He told me then that Joan is mentally ill. By the time I got home – there was a message on my answering machine – from the Town of Tonawanda police saying that Ruth Sippel Pace and my sisters Gert and Kathy were to stop calling Joan. yeah! Joan fucking called the cops on me and named two other people that had nothing to do with it!
When I told Gert, Gert called tonawanda police (long distance) and they told Gert “don’t worry, we know all about her.”
And in January 2011, in a facebook private message conversation I had with Joan’s ex husband, he told me that he has had to call the police LONG DISTANCE (he lived at the time in S. Carolina) to break up fights between Joan and her daughter. Who is being forced at the age of 24 to work two jobs to support herself and her mom. But in a myspace email to me the day after I called Joan about Aunt Doris, my niece is whining “don’t I have a right to a life of my own?” – yet, 3 years later, she’s still stuck with her mother – it reminds me of an old horror movie – sort of like “whatever happened to baby jane?” – but not quite. I fear that not only is Joan mentally ill, but if at the age of 24, you haven’t gotten away from your sick mother, you must be sick yourself. I feel sorry for mentally ill people, but to a point. – especially when you’ve been their target for harassment for years and can’t get it to stop!
After what joan did to me, 1980-82, I left Buffalo and was not aware of many things until 1992 when I started talking again with Ruth. It was difficult to follow because I had lost contact with relatives who were children or not even born when I left and the stories, about Joan’s behavior has always been sick and wierd.
in 1998 I too received a letter from Joan, that she sent to Ruth, to which I answered and told her why is she still bothering me when I told her to get lost in 1982 and then again in 1992?
When Ruth told me about how Joan was harassing Gail I couldn’t believe it…Joan never stops…
And just before she published that lying book she was setting the ground work, on the internet, AGAINST US….and I have the evidence dating back to 2008!
And since the book was published we siblings have gone after Joan’s lying and she has enlisted all kinds of people to ‘get us’ and they have failed because TRUTH WINS OUT. We are NOT DONE with telling all the truths that we know about this very dangerous person.
In a way I feel sorry for the poor sucker Brian, who believes Joan and went out of his way to ATTACK WOMEN he doesn’t know! He has been silent since we exposed the evidence of Joan’s email 2009 attacks on Kathy…and there is MORE evidence…so be aware…if you hang out with Joan Wheeler you will get burnt.
Joan Wheeler is a very dangerous person…we have been telling the world for a long long time….listen up and get away from her.
If you’re gonna tattle on others, make sure you tattle on yourself – Joan Wheeler paints herself as NEVER having done a thing to anybody else. (yeah, right). July 10, 2012Posted by Ruth in Joan Wheeler Speak - how Joan views the world.
Tags: abuse, blaming people for your own mess, bullying, contradictions, cowardice, dishonesty, embellishing the truth, false accusations, Lies, spreading untruths, stupidity
Found this on facebook. – In Joan Wheeler’s tell-all so-called “truthful” book, she made sure she told a lot of stuff that people were doing to her and I know for a fact that a lot of it was fabricated!
BUT Joan doesn’t tell what SHE has done to a lot of people. – And that’s why Gert and I have our blogs – to straighten out the twisted tales Joan presents in her book, AND to enlighten people on the things that Joan has done to us and others.
Tags: abuse, being downright nasty, bigotry, blaming people for your own mess, bullying, contradictions, cowardice, cyberbullying, dishonesty, embellishing the truth, emotional abuse, false accusations, Halloween, Halloween decor, harassment, harassment of an adoptee's birth family, hatred of infertile women, Joan "Chimp" Wheeler, Lies, Refuting Joan Wheelers statements, religious freedom, religious intolerance, SLANDER, stupidity
roflmao! – in case you need a refresher course in internet slang/shortcut – this means Roll On Floor Laughing MY Ass Off!
And this is just what I’m doing when reading Chimp’s new hatred post. And what bullshit – Chimp professes that he (and we know damn well it’s not a he, but Joan, hiding behind a made up person) – he and Joan don’t hate anyone. Really? Then why the continued use of Gertie and Ruthie – as personal bully digs and ridicule at us? Talk about being “fixated” – Joan is FIXATED on using the name Ruthie, as far back as December 2009. So drop the charade you fool. Or not – if you like making yourself into a laughing stock – then by all means- do so!
But I caught you Joan the Chimp – you fucked up! Because Pilgrim/Champ/Brian has been saying all along that Kathy has said nothing, but then all of sudden Chimps says “If 3 healthy healthy, mentally stable individuals insist on ganging up on one disaled person” – um, how did Kathy get into this all of a sudden? – Because Joan can’t stop lumping us all together. Idiot. Then Chimp says that Kathy seems to have lost interest. – What are you saying Chimp? Either Kathy is insisting on being on the team, or she has lost interest. MAKE UP YOUR MIND! (but see – I’ve said it before over and over – Joan contradicts herself left and right, even in one paragraph, as we see right here.) And she makes stupid grammar mistakes – she repeated the word healthy – twice. She does that too. So we can tell by the writing style that Chimp is in fact Joan. – Um and another giveaway that Joan and Chimp are the same – Joan’s posts are always full of misspellings – she can’t even spell the word disabled.
oh, yes, we are “attacking” a disabled person. Never mind this “disabled” person just was on a website two weeks ago ATTACKING pro-adoption people and infertile women. Oh give me a break – disabled my ass! Her herniated disc in her neck and other ailments did not stop HER from attacking and bullying other people online – so shove it JoanChimp.
Chimp also says: “No, I didn’t bother reading it. I’m not interested in adding any more lunacy to my existance..” — What? do you mean you already HAVE lunacy in your existence? – You got that right you fool. — and by the way FOOL – there is no A in existence! Learn to spell.
Chimp goes on to say: “The only reason for this blog is to try to get you to mind your own business.” — Excuse me you fool: JOAN’S GARBAGE BOOK AND WHAT SHE SAYS ABOUT US ON THE INTERNET IS OUR BUSINESS! WHEN SHE TALKS ABOUT HER BIRTH FAMILY AND HER BIRTH SISTERS –SHE IS TALKING ABOUT US AND THEREFORE IT IS OUR BUSINESS. – You clearly need to learn English pal.
Another giveaway this is really Joan talking is another attack on religion. Joan is obsessed with other people’s religions and people’s religious values. She is always ranting against the Catholic Church. In her book, on the internet, she said it to our father’s face, causing him to finally shove her out his life forever!
In September 2008, on her blog, Joan attacked Gert and mine’s pagan religion and brought up our “pagan values.” She attacked Kathy’s religion on her blog in October 2009. AND on pages 300-302, Joan is attacking us and putting us down for our choices in religion and spirituality.
Now we have another attack on our values. Joan, pay attention to your own filthy values – oh wait – you have none. Because for anyone to hurt her own sister like YOU did – like stealing hundreds of dollars from her, calling her place of employement for months trying to get her fired, AFTER you were told what you accused her of didn’t happen – WHO ARE YOU TO TALK ABOUT VALUES? But we see how judgmental and two-faced JoanChimp is – She can do anything she wants – but let someone else do the same thing she does – and all of sudden she gets spiritually endowed and preach-happy about values. Bitch.
Oh I absolutely love the crap Chimp says about me ripping wings off of flies and scaring children. WHAT AN ASSHOLE! – This is because Chimp Joan falls into the same HATE propaganda against pagans and shows us what a bigot she is. Just as she published erroneous and hateful propaganda in her book, this nutball comes on to say crap about pagans. What an asshole.
Ripping wings off of flies. What kind of MATURE person says this shit? My god, not even in The Wizard of Oz is the Wicked Witch of the West so hatefully portrayed. That movie perpetuates the wrongful charicature of a witch – green skinned, with a wart on her nose, flying around on a broomstick. But Elphaba NEVER ripped wings off flies. What crap are you listening to Joan? You are so laughable. roflmao! –
Scaring children? Oh – this goes back to her continual digs at me because she says I hate her kids, hate all kids, ridicules me for liking horror movies. Again – we see Chimp and Joan are the same person.
Scaring children? roflmao! In years past, John and I used to decorate our porch for holidays. We stopped when the porch floor got too rotted – we didn’t want anyone getting hurt. Even though we had the new porch put on 4 years ago – we haven’t decorated since – just haven’t had the time. Besides we want to put up lattice-work around the porch to semi-enclose it. And the lattice work will give us a better backdrop to hang things on.
Yes, we decorated for the Winter Solstice, which is the Pagan winter holiday. Got a problem with that Chimp? Too bad. Take it up with the Founding Fathers of this country because they wrote in Freedom of Religion in our constitution. Got something to say about the Constitution of the United States bitch?
But our favorite holiday is Halloween – well the popular American take on the Pagan Samhain. But we enjoy the fun that goes with the whole Halloween thing and Trick or Treat. Our neighbors would decorate their porches with smiling jack-o-lanterns, happy harvest scarecrows, hay bales, corn stalks. John and I – our jack-o-lanterns were scowling faces. We had skeletons and bats hanging from spiderwebs. Giant spiders and giant swamp rats everywhere. Ghouls, ghosts, and goblins were our decor fare.
And our house was the most popular in the neighborhood. John wore a black robe and hood, skeleton gloves and a ghoul mask. When the kids came up and yelled “Trick or Treat,” I would stand behind the door and open it slowly, then John would jump out. Yes, we did scare one girl – she was about 14 – she was scared so bad – she screamed, ran off our porch, across the street, and up the stairs onto the porch of a house across the street from us. Screaming as she went. Then she turned around, and came back, laughing her ass off. She said “You scared me so bad. But I love it!”
So for your enjoyment – here are some pictures of our house decorated for Halloween. You don’t like horror novels, movies or decor Joan – that’s fine. But your continued putting me down for it shows the world for what you are – a schoolyard bully ridiculing another person for their likes and their values. YOU have shown the world what YOU really are.
We first started decorating our house in the mid 90’s starting with simple things, then graduating into more things. I put up a small table, covered with an old sheet that I had lightly dyed purple and then dipped briefly into black dye. This gave it a real dirty “graveyard” look. The table had swamp rats and scowling jack-o-lanterns. Under the table, concealed by the sheet, were small speakers leading to a boombox just inside our door that played Halloween music and sound effects. Eventually, we put out another table, on the other side of the porch, that held a “flaming” cauldron, more ghouls and swamp rats and a fog machine. I dont’ have any pictures that have the flames and fog going. But it looked great!
Here is our house Halloween 2000. For the previous Winter Solstice, I had put up a huge display of lights to celebrate the coming of the new milennium, with a “2000” sign, that I left up for a whole year, incorporating it into my Valentine’s Day, St. Patrick’s day, 4th of July and Summer decor.
Here is Halloween 2001, with Brandy our DOG (not cat, you bimbo JoanChimp):
Here are two views of 2001’s decor in the daytime:
This is a skull that John hung in our rec room window. I don’t know what year this was taken, but you should see some of the ghoulish stuff we have in there! Oh yes – we love shopping at The Spirit of Halloween store. And we love going to the various Haunted House mazes in our area.
Here is John in 2001, in his full costume holding our CAT Samantha. (not dog, JoanChimp).
Now, lastly, here is John in 2001, with the kids of our friends from around the block: ages 12, 4 and 5. Now if a 4 year old, and a 5 year old is clearly at ease with our ghoulish decorations, where does Joan get off saying that because of my pagan religion that I’m scaring kids. – the one kid has his face blacked out for privacy reasons.
Ruth answers Champ April 26, 2012Posted by Ruth in Announcements and updates, Joan Wheeler Speak - how Joan views the world, Joan Wheeler's abuse and harassment of her birth family.
Tags: abuse, blaming people for your own mess, bullying, cowardice, cyberbullying, embellishing the truth, false accusations, harassment, harassment of an adoptee's birth family, Refuting Joan Wheelers statements, stupidity
So in her latest cyberbullying attack on her birth sisters, Joan uses one of her multiple personalities called Champ. She really shows her true self in this piece of garbage. Despite her recent posts on her Forbidden Family website promoting peace, respect and love, and not harming anyone, and despite knowing full well that I don’t like to be called Ruthie, she goes out of her way to shove that name at me. So does she think she has hurt me? No, I don’t like to be called Ruthie, but dayam, I ain’t gonna lose any sleep over it. All she accomplished was to show the entire world what a bitch she is.
Gert has already torn apart this Champ in her post “Joan Wheeler has a new friend, by the name of Champ! don’t tell her we know, wink, wink!” – and I already placed a comment on it. (a good one too!)
Now supposedly, Champ is not Joan, but a good friend of Joan’s – but on the post, refuses to give his name. He says his name is not important. Oh yes it is buddy – because when you put shit out about someone on the internet (or anywhere for that matter, you show the world what you really are – a snively little gossip mongering COWARD. But in reading the post, and reading between the line, Gert and I can see that Champ is no man, (double entrende intended) but Joan herself. Because of the rhetoric, use of language, phrases, – see, we have been dealing with Joan’s bullshit writings far longer than she has been on the internet – for over 30 years. And we have read her writings, her filthy book, and a lot of other crap she has put out – for over 30 years. We have dealt with her in person, and on the phone. We have been in intimate conversations with her, arguments, and even screaming matches with her. We know how she thinks and we can recognize her foul stench for parsecs.
This is how Joan fantasizes herself as Champ – stepping on Ruthie. But you know, it certainly goes against her latest posting of promoting respect and not harming anyone – but we all know she’s a hypocrite.
and I got a whole box for you – in large size too! Just to fill your huge mouth.
Go get ’em Champ boy! ruff, ruff.
MilkBones are great. I used to give them to my Siberian Husky/Alaskan Malamute – Brandy. Brandy was a such a sweetheart – 65 pounds of love. Now silly ass Joan in her book, relates a conversation she is having with a police detective about me and annoyance phone calls. At that time, I had my phone bill under the name of Brittany Sippel – to ward off people getting my phone number. In a letter Joan wrote to my niece Karen, Joan admits to knowing that my phone was listed under Brittany Sippel, but in her book, during this fictious conversation with the police detective, she has him saying to her, “Who’s Brandy Sippel?” and Joan says, “that’s Ruth’s cat. Why?” and the detective says, “well she’s got her phone number listed under Brandy Sippel.”
So what does this prove? That Joan can’t tell the difference between a cat and a dog, and by her own letter to Karen that says BRITTANY, not BRANDY – we see her book is not the truth. And the real DOG is Joan “Champ” Wheeler.
some examples of Joan Wheeler’s bad behavior – why nobody wants to hang out with her December 22, 2011Posted by Ruth in Joan Wheeler's abuse and harassment of her birth family.
Tags: abuse, being downright nasty, bullying, cowardice, dishonesty, Disrespect, emotional abuse, emotional blackmail, false accusations, harassment of an adoptee's birth family, Lies, stupidity
In her book, Joan complains about my cousin Gail. Gail died of cancer in 2003 at the age of 49. She had been battling it for a few years. And while she was battling cancer, she was being harassed by the bully Joan Wheeler.
Now my sister Gert had moved from Buffalo in 1982 and did not know a lot of what was happening in Buffalo. In an email yesterday, I mentioned something about Gail and Gert emailed me back and said she didn’t know all about the Gail thing. So I elaborated. Then I thought – I was going to get into this on the blog in the future, but since I typed it all out now, I may as well just go ahead and blog it now. So here is what I wrote to Gert this morning, via email. I have only changed a couple of names. Read on and see what a “nice” person Joan Wheeler is.
The Gail thing started in 1993 when Joan’s daughter got sick with the hypothroidism -and Joan wanted information if anyone else in the family had similar medical problems. no problems there, just a mother wanting to give info to the doctors. Since she had burnt her bridges with Gert and Ruth, and was in the process of burning them with Kathy, she turned to the extended family. Nobody paid attention to her and just said they didn’t know anything. Dad was his usual helpful self – meaning – no help at all. Gail got a few phone calls from Joan and ignored her. Then Joan sent a packet of medical information about her daughter to Gail. Gail saw the return address and marked “Return to Sender.” Joan then called her at 10pm, when Gail and Kevin were in bed and left a screaming message on the machine – “don’t you know this is IMPORTANT MEDICAL INFORMATION THAT COULD SAVE YOUR SON?” Kevin wanted to pick up the phone and bitch Joan out but Gail said to just ignore her.
Sometime in 1997 or 1998, Joan had a busted windshield and went to get it fixed. By chance – the repairman was R.M.III. (h they were both thrilled that they were cousins. And Joan went to his house for dinner. When Gail found out – she told him to stay away from her because of the shit she had done to me. R. gave Joan the cold shoulder and hung up on her once. She called his job and tried to make trouble for him (sound familiar?) In the meantime, I got a letter from Joan accusing Gail, R, me and Francine of plotting against her. Fran came by for lunch and I read her the letter and Fran said, “but – but – I never met your cousin R.”
Joan started writing letters to Gail, which she kept refusing. Gail made a complaint to the Town of Eden police. They sent Joan a letter telling her NOT to contact Gail. She sent Gail another letter. (by this time it was 1999). Gail was about to return to sender and drop it in the mailbox when she noticed something funny about the return address. It had the wrong zipcode on it – and Joan’s street address wasn’t quite right. The zipcode was actually GAIL’S ZIPCODE! and Joan’s street name was not spelled right. This would make the post office not be able to find Joan’s house and bring it RIGHT BACK TO GAIL. Gail said “enough.” and took it right to the police. They called Joan up and asked did you not get our letter telling you not to contact Mrs. B.?” She said yes. They asked her, “and did you just send her this letter?” She said yes. The police said ok, and hung up. he opened the letter and started reading it and was laughing, and Gail said what was it? And he started reading it – it was the same bullshit about Gail refusing to learn medical information to save her son, and plotting with Ruth to “get” her. While this was going on – the phone at the police station rang and it was Joan wanting to know if they, the Town of Eden police had called her. They said yes – and you will be hearing from the courts as well. It was the TOWN OF EDEN POLICE, NOT GAIL, who instituted the harassment charges on Joan – coincidentally the exact same month that I hauled her into court over the shit letter telling me John got the next-door neighbor pregnant. And because she used her friend Bo’s address (Carol in the book), without her permission – Bo. took her to court as well. So in one month, Joan had to answer harassment charges in Tonawanda, Buffalo, and Eden.
From 1997 to 1999, Gail got several phone calls and several letters from Joan – and she refused to read them, and DID NOT CALL ME – to keep me out of it. It wasn’t until AFTER she got her one-year order of protection against Joan (the same as me and Bo.) – did she call me and tell me what she did. She wanted to prove to the family that it was not RUTH, but Joan who was doing the shit. And she called Dad to tell him that too.
And it really pisses me off that Joan had the fucking nerve to show up at Gail’s wake. I was talking to R. III, when Joan and her boyfriend D.s (the one she met online) walked in. R. and I both gave her a dirty look and we both needed to go outside and get a smoke. While we were out there – we noticed everybody else was out there – either standing near us and smoking, or off to the side having fresh air. – My husband John went back inside to take a look – and came out – and said the whole place had emptied out! Even Dad came outside, talking with a couple of the Herr relatives.
So Joan walks in – and everybody walks out. Even J. left. AND J. asked me when J.’s husband died if Joan would be coming. When I told her no, she said “thank god.” Nobody wants that bitch around.
(Ruth’s additional comment, on my facebook page, on a link to this post, one of R.’s sisters wrote this:
D. M. – Have No Fear I Will Never Run Away From Joan Wheeler, I Will Speak For My Family, She Is Nothing To Us And Never Will Be, She Is A Blight On This EARTH…….NEVER GIVE UP FIGHTING ARE FAMLIYS HONOR,,,
- 1. Ruth – December 22, 2011
to clarify – at the end that was J. asking if Joan was going to show up at her husband Jerry’s funeral.
I miss him very much too. He was a wonderful man. And contrary to how Joan portrays the extended family “hating” my father (because of him not wanting experimental cancer treatments for my mother and not saving her life) – this cousin AND her husband, ALWAYS respected my father. And he of them. She always called my Dad, Uncle Leonard (because he was her uncle- and used to babysit us kids) and her husband always called Dad by his first name.
So contrary to how Joan portrays the Herr family as all hating my father – no – they didn’t.
You know…as I’m reading this and I know the characters, it dawns on me that NO ONE CAN MAKE THIS SHIT UP!
No, this is NOT any kind of story to ‘get Joan’! This ACTUALLY happened, by Joan, she has always caused severe trouble within the family, not just to us siblings, as this account of Ruth’s details, but everyone in the family.
do people wonder WHY we siblings have refuted the book Joan wrote, and why we are setting the record straight, and exposes Joan Wheeler for every toxic thing she did to us and our family.
Beware of Joan Wheeler!
you are absolutely correct Gert – I did not make ANYthing up here at all!
And the sisters of R.III, having known what Joan did to their brother and their Aunt Gail, HATE Joan. NOT from any badmouthing that Ruth could have told them – but from THE FACTS OF JOAN’S OWN STUPID BEHAVIOR!
Joan says in her book that I, Ruth, turned Gail against her. No, Joan, YOU turned Gail against you. Do you honestly think that someone, in bed, trying to get to sleep because they have to get up early to go to work, likes getting a message on their answering machine from a screaming lunatic? (oh, that’s right Joan – you never HAD to get up early because you never held down a decent job in your life).
Moving right along – and to clarify another point – there was nothing wrong with Gail’s son. He was in perfect health. Still is. So what was that shit all about? “important medical information that could save your son’s life!” What a f’ing moron! Ok, so Joan’s daughter had some medical issues that may or may not be shared with biological relatives. You just don’t go around SCREAMING such things on somebody’s answering machine! By the time Gail got around to telling me this, several years had passed and Gail and I had were laughing our asses off about it.
Yes, Joan really knows how to impress people. Too bad it’s NOT the impression that she wants people to know about her – there is NO picture that I could paint about Joan that would tell another person how she is – it would not compare to the reality of her behavior! Me telling Gail what a nutball Joan is simply is not the same as Gail having heard first hand Joan’s screaming mouth – yelling stupid ridiculous garbage! And Joan even chronicles in her book how she screamed at people! and physically and mentally abused her own adopted mother and her own son!
Same thing about this blog. I am telling the truth here – and if some morons out there want to continue to associate with Joan – well, I can’t stop them. They will have to find out first hand what a nut she is. Her latest boyfriend broke up with her – after only a few months. Her whole book chronicles one broken relationship after another broken relationship – not just her ex-husband or boyfriends, but – family members from both her adopted and birth families and friends. Even former foster parents of her birth sisters, step-aunt and uncle of her birth sisters. I can add to the list. A former teen pop star and his wife. Two former landlords, a lawyer, a former neighhbor (who lived in the apartment next to her), my ex-husband, my friend, my present husband.
Everybody who has dealings with Joan and eventually gets to know her, and/or suffers from her shitty behavior all do the same thing – run the hell away from her!
UPDATE Jan 18, 2014…via Gert
I want to add a post that is related here where Joan attempted to get my daughter to commit a crime so that Joan could pursue a medical malpractice case. Yep Joan is one sleazy character.
Atttention Lori Corangelo; Amfor (Americans for Open Records) re: Joan Wheeler, Forbidden Family December 11, 2011Posted by Ruth in Black and White Evidence of Joan Wheeler's Lies: Letters, Court Documents, Joan Wheeler's abuse and harassment of her birth family, Refuting Joan Wheelers statements.
Tags: abuse, adoption, adoption reform, adoption reunion, Americans for Open Records, AMFOR, being downright nasty, bullying, contradictions, cowardice, embellishing the truth, false accusations, harassment, harassment of an adoptee's birth family, LIBEL, Lies, Lori Corangelo, misrepresenting one's credentials, Refuting Joan Wheelers statements, SLANDER, spreading untruths
LORI CORANGELO AND OTHERS: I think you’d better read this: from the pdf. file of Trafford’s Publishing’s “Terms and Conditions.” These are the Terms and Conditions that Joan Wheeler agreed to when she signed (under false pretenses) her contract with Trafford and the ones that she VIOLATED – she had hate speech in her book, obscene language, had me saying things that I didn’t, labeled me as a computer hacker with a criminal record and used MY photograph.
2. YOUR LEGAL RESPONSIBILITY
2.1. You represent that you are the sole copyright owner of the Work and all of its content.
2.2. You represent that the Work does not infringe upon any statutory or common law right of copyright, libel or privacy of any third party.
2.4. You further represent that the Work does not contain illegal, unlawful or objectionable material including, but not limited to, pornography, obscenity or hate speech. You acknowledge that the Work is not plagiarized and does not include falsely attributed statements of third parties.
3.(Trafford’s Legal Responsibility
3.2. We reserve the right to refuse to provide and/or to discontinue ALL Services upon our discovery of any violation by you of these Terms and Conditions, any other actions, omissions or misconduct by you with respect to Work, and/or your performance under these Terms and Conditions. In the event a complaint is made by a third party regarding the Work, we reserve the right to suspend the Services in accordance with Section 7.1 until such time as the complaint is satisfactorily resolved, as determined by us in our sole discretion.
Now Lori go and read these two posts and read them word for word so you can UNDERSTAND what Joan Wheeler did –
Tell us again Lori of how Joan made a “mistake” – you are full of shit, and so is Joan.
You want open records Lori? That equates to the TRUTH, does it not Lori? We are open and TRUTHFUL here on our blogs. Can you handle the TRUTH Lori?
from Gert McQueen’s blog: Do some adoptees, that have mental illness, get it from their genes or environment or because they are adopted? Joan Wheeler presents her views! November 7, 2011Posted by Ruth in Joan Wheeler Speak - how Joan views the world, Lessons in Life, Refuting Joan Wheelers statements.
Tags: abuse, adoption, adoption reform, adoption reunion, being downright nasty, blaming people for your own mess, bullying, contradictions, cowardice, embellishing the truth, emotional abuse, false accusations, harassment of an adoptee's birth family, Lies, mental illness, mental instability, Refuting Joan Wheelers statements, SLANDER, stupidity, theft, whining
« on: October 24, 2011, 03:28:47 PM »
Nancy Verrier’s other book, Coming Home to Self: The Adopted Child Grows Up, is one that ought to be given to any therapist who treats an adoptee. Verrier addresses the core issues of abandonment and loss. On page 429: “…proceeds from the separation trauma. It would be a huge mistake to try to untangle the adoptee’s relationship to the adoptive parents without understanding of the lens through which the adoptee views them. All other relationships in the adoptee’s life will be misunderstood as well. Something devastating happened to him which makes him distrust close relationships.” … “Instead of pathologizing society’s penchant for separating babies and their mothers, we pathologize the victims of a grave wrongdoing… We need to normalize the adoptee’s and the birth mother’s responses to this separation or at least come up with a better diagnosis, because what is happening is that inaccurate diagnoses are resulting in poor or harmful treatment.” “Many adoptees have been diagnosed with personality disorders simply as a result of the ignorance of the helping professions….The most notorious is the diagnosis of borderline personality disorder. This term is frequently used within the mental health profession as little more than (page 430) a sophisticated insult…..Adoptees are not Borderlines!” Basically, adoptees do not split in their minds. Adoptees actually do have two mothers and two fathers. (my words) On page 448: “This brings us to a more accurate diagnosis for what adoptees and birth mothers are suffering from —- post-traumatic stress disorder. …trauma is based in reality, unlike other psychological disorders, trauma is based on a true experience.” Get the book and ask your therapist to read it.
“All other relationships in the adoptee’s life will be misunderstood as well..
Really? – What I UNDERSTAND is that when I was reunited with my adopted-out birth sister Joan Wheeler, after I opened my life and arms and heart to her is that is was clear that her morals and values were NOT like mine, or other members of my family. We were raised not to steal, not to lie, to treat people with kindness. Unlike Joan. I don’t know where she learned it from – but just a few years after our reunion she turned into a bitch.
She lied to me, manipulated me, stole from me, harassed me, set me up to phone her by sending me forged letters and greeting cards, (and when I phoned, she hung up on me, then told the police that it was ME who was placing annoyance phone calls), then she called my job to get me fired, tried to break me and my fiance up, wrote letters to his mother trashing me, wrote letters to elected officials, called child abuse on herself, implicating me, sent me a letter telling me my infertile husband got the next door neighbor pregnant, writes a book full of slander and libel. – Sooo what’s to understand?
So, let me get this straight – in Nancy Verrier’s book, Coming Home to Self: The Adopted Child Grows Up, she says, “Many adoptees have been diagnosed with personality disorders simply as a result of the ignorance of the helping professions”
I don’t need to have doctorate as a “helping profession” (does she mean psyciatrists, psychologists, mental health counselors), to know that WRONGFUL THINGS were done to me by an out-of-control person who refuses to grow up.
As for Post Traumatic Stress Disorder – many many people suffer from it. But that does not give ANYbody an excuse to break the law, harass other people, bully other people, or generally be a total idiot. My husband is a Vietnam Veteran who has PTSD and still somehow holds down a job, owns a house, takes care of the house and me, is a law-abiding person, does not bully or bother anyone. So don’t give that crap that Joan Wheeler’s behavioral problems needs to be “understood.” BULL! She’s a trouble-making liar, plain and simple as that.
so getting back to the queston on the forum: “If you are diagnosed mentally ill…. do you feel it is genetics, crazy upbringing by aparents or is it just the life on an adoptee? where do you think it comes from.” – – I don’t care where it comes from – all I know is that I have been used and abused by Joan Wheeler and I don’t give a damn about any so-called “trauma” Joan has endured – from anything – all I know is IT DOES NOT GIVE HER THE RIGHT TO TURN AROUND AND TRAUMATIZE ME.
I was NOT traumatized by HER adoption! so get that thought right out of your heads. I suffered from the loss of MY mother. Then my father’s disastrous second marriage. Yet, I managed to grow up into a law-abiding person, who is contributing member of society, a person who has held down the same job in the same facility for 39 years, who saw disinetgrating quality of life issues on my street (drug use, litter, rodents) and organized a block club and worked with local government officials to correct those problems. And for that – Joan ridicules me in her book. What asshole ridicules a person who is trying to better American society? Joan Wheeler – that’s who. Oh, I’m SORRY, poor little Joan was adopted, and despite the title of that book (adoptees grow up) – Joan Wheeler will NEVER grow up. – excuse me while I go puke.
It’s so much easier to place the blame on someone or something else when you fuck up.
“The devil made me do it.” – No, YOU made you do it.
“You made do it.” – No, YOU made you do it.
“My rotten childhood made me do it.” No, YOU made you do it.
“My adoptive parents made me do it.” No, YOU made you do it.
We are human and we will all make mistakes. The point is, when you make a mistake, own up to it. There is no devil, no other person, be they your parent (adopted or birth), other family member, boss, rude cashier at the store, co-worker, customer, neighbor, that can MAKE YOU DO ANYTHING YOU DON’T WANT TO DO!
I have said before on my blog – when Joan has written lies about me on the internet – it wasn’t me who forced my way into her house, hold her gunpoint, march her to the computer and “make” her type out lies about me – it was Joan herself, who made the concsious decision to write her lies. And she has gotten caught in some lies, some contradictions on the internet. We have copied and pasted her words, making notes of the dates and place where she said something, and then a few months later, we have seen her contradict herself on the internet. Again, I didn’t hold a gun to her to make her make a liar out of herself. She alone did that. As it was Joan’s conscious decision all these years to commit those harassments against me and others. She just doesn’t have the courage and backbone to stand up for herself and admit it. She’s a sniveling little coward and will just lay all the blame on me and her other sisters for the failure of our reunion. Or blame someone else.
There’s a cute little thing about blame – when you point a finger at someone, look at your hand, you will see your other fingers all pointing back at — YOU!
Stop with the whining, the blaming, the nonsense that “I was adopted, I can’t help myself” bullshit. ‘Cos that’s all it is – BULLSHIT!
And if you’re mentally ill, for god’s sake, take your damn medications so you won’t be a nuisance to other. Because we all have busy lives and we don’t have time for you losers. Maybe you didn’t ask to be mentally ill, and for that, I’m genuinely sorry, just like I feel bad for people with MS, cancer, cystic fibrosis. HOWEVER, my sympathy stops when you make MY life miserable and then turn around gleefully and say, “It’s not my fault – I got PTSD!” – ‘cos I don’t buy that excuse either.
Lesson for Joan Wheeler and all other whiny adoptees October 10, 2011Posted by Ruth in Lessons in Life, Refuting Joan Wheelers statements.
Tags: adoption, blaming people for your own mess, bullying, cowardice, dishonesty, Disrespect, Lies, Refuting Joan Wheelers statements, Steve Jobs, stupidity, whining
Get off your ass and make something of yourself. Nobody else is going to do it for you. Life ain’t easy – you either sink or swim. And if you think somebody is going to throw you a life preserver – you are dead wrong. And shaddup your dam whining. Life is full of pain and disappoinments, so you when shit happens, ya cry a little, mope a little – then you get it on with it! 55 years is just too damn long to be whining about something that happened when you were an infant. Acknowledge your pain, then get on with life!
And if you make a mistake – and everybody does – own up to it. And just because you think YOUR life is miserable – that doesn’t give you the right to make other people’s lives miserable. If you lie about someone, steal from them, act like an asshole around them, and they decide not to be around you – be a damn Woman and own up to the fact that it was because of YOUR actions and words that they can’t stand you.
If you talk shit about people, don’t get all surprised when they talk shit about you in turn.
There is no Prince Charming – the only person who can rescue you is —- YOU!
– RIP and Thank You to Steve Jobs.
Gert McQueen answers the secret is out – more evidence of misdeeds and lies by Joan Wheeler May 19, 2011Posted by Ruth in Black and White Evidence of Joan Wheeler's Lies: Letters, Court Documents, Joan Wheeler's abuse and harassment of her birth family, Refuting Joan Wheelers statements.
Tags: abuse, adoption, being downright nasty, blaming people for your own mess, bullying, cowardice, dishonesty, Disrespect, Dr. Rene Hoksbergen, emotional abuse, emotional blackmail, false accusations, harassment of an adoptee's birth family, Lies, Refuting Joan Wheelers statements, stealing from your own family, theft, whining
by Gert McQueen
There are many essays or blog posts that I have written that have not been seen yet on this blog. Seeing that we are discussing and showing our EVIDENCE I feel it is time for the following to be posted. It is part of a larger essays where I discuss many pieces of evidence about Joan’s lying. And we do have the physical documents to go with it. Here we go:
BUT FIRST…UPDATE, August 2016,
as older posts are being seen I’m updating with links to my second blog and a Facebook page wherein I expose AGAIN the lies, fabrications and hate that Joan M Wheeler says about me and family. After the first book was pulled from publication by the publisher, May 2011, she has ‘self-published’ another ‘revised’ version. In this ‘version’ called ‘duped by adoption’ she has increased her exploitation by including PICTURES and REAL NAMES and much more personal information violating again the families. Joan has no decency NOR shame. There is NOTHING in this book for adoption reform. She is totally against adoption and her two families. To learn more see…
keep this all in mind as you READ this EVIDENCE, then ask your self…is Joan really to be believed?
The next pieces of evidence are in connection to the article The secret is out that Joan wrote in 1990 published in England and the aftermath from it. This article caused great concern because in the article Joan uses her sisters’ real names, interestingly enough not mine. In any event, the publication of that article is what caused certain letters to be written, alerting those agencies, listed in the article, that privacy was not afforded to the persons mentioned in the article. These letters were not ‘harassments’ but legitimate letters of concern for the breach of privacy the author committed. It is only Joan who turns these letters into gross obscene letters in her fabrication of telling of them.
As I have stated in previous posts, I did not write any letters to Joan and it is a falsehood for Joan to write in her book on pg 308 ‘…my sisters wrote harassing letters in the months after our family reunion of 92’. Which sisters? She does not say, so how can anyone be sure whom Joan is referring to?
(Ruths’ note: as usual, Joan lumps all three of her sisters as one entity. Only thing is, we didn’t write harassing letters to her, either individually or collectively.)
On pg 310 she writes ‘…the 40 page letter that my sisters put together…’ and ‘…my sisters included copies of long handwritten letters they wrote to the nine major adoption…’ Wrong! Joan does not name the sisters because there were no sisters, in the plural. Ruth and I never wrote to those nine major adoption agencies listed in the article. Kathy wrote legitimate letters of concern for the breach of privacy; all else is pure nonsense and fabrication by Joan. Furthermore, Kathy wrote an seven-page letter, not 40 pages; Joan loves hyperbole! (see graphics #4a-4g below).
Hyperbole…exaggeration: deliberate and obvious exaggeration used for effect.
Again, we shall revisit this issue, when I return to the book, after I complete this presentation of the evidence of Joan’s own behavior of fabrication, telling lies, doing harassments, and other deeds that are not in her book. For now it is sufficient to state that we three sisters, who are refuting the lies of Joan, possess proof that she is a liar and user of hyperbole solely for the effect of putting us sisters in bad light.
As part of the fallout from the breach of privacy and Joan’s consistent disregard for returning Kathy’s personal property to her, Kathy in England , demanded her property returned to her. There were negotiations; monies sent by Kathy to Joan, for shipping, back and forth letters, but all of Kathy’s efforts were stalled by Joan because Joan had excuse after excuse for not sending them.
Evidence here: In two letters that Joan wrote to Kathy (ca.1992) we learn from Joan, in one, ‘…yes I did receive the money order…put it in a special account for when I have time to pack everything for you…can’t do it right now…don’t have a car…can’t do anything right now…Colby lost his job…trying to cope with unemployment…I am working two part-time jobs…pay is low…with this new upset…going and finding your scrapbooks will just have to wait…. the records are safe…I’ll let you know when I can get the stuff together…before Christmas…’ and in another ‘…have been sad that our relationship ended abruptly and that I have caused you pain…felt the need to reach out to you…need to apologize for overstepping my bounds in your life…I respect your right to privacy and am sorry for my past behaviors…I ask forgiveness…and hope that we can be friends again…since I’m rather busy now, I will try to pack up your things sometime before Christmas…working two part-time jobs and will be going back to college in the fall…’ (see graphics 1 and 2 below).
So we see from Joan’s own words; that she did receive money to send Kathy’s things back to her, that she put the money in a special account, for when she has time, but she can’t do it now, no car, husband lost a job, coping with unemployment, working two jobs, pay is low, new upset, getting your stuff will just have to wait, let you know when I can get the stuff to you later but sad that our relationship ended abruptly and I caused you pain, need to reach out to you, to apologize, respect your right to privacy, sorry for past behaviors, ask forgiveness, can be friends, but I’m rather busy now, will try to pack your stuff before Christmas, working two jobs and going back to college in the fall.
Would you, reader, buy that brunch of boloney? She was given the money to ship the items but found excuses for not doing so and yet she has the money and time to go back to college! How nice! Priorities!
Neither did Kathy, buy it that is, and when Kathy puts the pressure on to get her property back, Joan enlists the ‘big guy’; Dr. Rene Hoksbergen, the very same that wrote the forward of this book of lies and fabrications! It ought to be noted that the last time the good Dr. saw a ‘draft’ of the book was in 2006, three years before publication! Joan has done extensive rewrites since he saw it. I wonder if Dr Hoksbergen would approve of the published work? Perhaps I shall write him! I’ll think about that!
In the meanwhile, I’ll just inform folks with, yes that’s right, evidence here, just what Dr Hoksbergen said to my sister Kathy on Joan’s behalf. (see graphic #3 below). It ought to be remembered that Joan is a very good con artist. Joan can play the part of the misused, misunderstood adoptee, that the birth family seems to go out of their way to make life miserable for her. This letter by Dr Hoksbergen was written to Kathy in April 1993.
In part he says: ‘…you will be amazed that you suddenly get a letter from a complete stranger…(goes into his educational and professional backgrounds)…connected with the phenomenon of adoption …conference in 1987 I met your sister Joan Wheeler…tried to help her with some of her questions and problems…I very well know the complexity of her life situation and emotional stress this often gives to her…sometimes we have to give adoptees some more time and understanding then we do in other occasions…conference in April I had a long discussion with Joan about many important family related questions. It has become clear to me that she is very sad about the problems she seems to have with you. It is a pity that rather uncomplicated questions of yours, has given deep going emotional stress to at least Joan and as far as I understand also to you. Let me be more clear: you have asked her to send back your goods…last year Joan had a lot of material problems…not having a car, losing her jobs etc…Joan does not have the money…(goes into detail about weight and costs)…it is an idea to ask Joan what precisely you definitely want to have back as soon as possible…the rest could be taken back slowly, when you visit your friends and relations in the USA…to my opinion problems like these should not divide people…related…who might need each other…when people live far away from each other…things easily might become complicated…I would ask you to forgive Joan what you think she did wrongly…I’m sure that her intensions are good…but she has problems to carry out the things you asked her…I know she would love it so much to have a good friendship with you…she has tried to see you in Liverpool…but she does not have the money for it…it is a useful idea if you write me back about your suggestions…if you prefer this in stead of writing directly to Joan…I know that she very much want to solve the problems you have with each other…’
Okay! Here’s what I see in this communication; first and foremost intimidation by a professional with the use of a condescending tone to a woman who has already paid to have her personal property return and is being denied justice. Secondly, what I see is, the continuation of the mixture of intimidation as well as a good dose of browbeating, which btw is somewhat common with the professional attitudes of doctors.
‘phenomenon of adoption’ …since when is adoption a phenomenon?
‘complexity of her life situation and emotional stress’ …do only adoptee have complexity and emotional stress, is this some kind of new ‘condition’ that the rest of the population doesn’t have?
‘give adoptees some more time and understanding then we do in other occasions’ …again, what makes the adoptee some kind of special needs person? Does this mean they are in the same category as the physically and mentally ‘challenged’ individuals are in (for those that are not PCs they are commonly called retarded)?
‘she is very sad about the problems she seems to have with you’ …oh so Joan needs a professional to communicate that sentiment?
‘it is a pity’ …no shit!
‘Let me be more clear’ …by all means, what he is saying is that Kathy and by extension the rest of the birth family ‘needs’ to understand the special conditions that the adoptee has and we must alter our views.
(Ruth’s note: the birth family is not considered to be human, with our own human needs, desires, etc. ONLY the adoptee matters. – BULLSHIT – I am just as IMPORTANT as the adoptee, they are NOT the center of the universe, just because in their view, they got shafted. LOTS of people the world over get shafted every day, adopted or not. Life sucks. DEAL WITH IT.)
‘Joan does not have the money’ … she was given the money, what happened to it and even if she wasn’t given the money why is it that she can’t give back someone else’s property?
(Ruth’s note: What happened to this money, that Joan says she put in a “special account?” I know what happened to it – the same thing that happened to MY money that Joan and I had in a joint checking account for the purpose of buying real estate in 1990 – Joan STOLE it – used if for HER living expenses).
‘had a lot of material problems’ …is Joan the only person in the world with problems, does not Kathy have anything in her life that should be considered here?
‘the rest could be taken back slowly, when you visit your friends and relations in the USA’ …an assumption that Kathy will be visiting the USA, was never in the negotiations to begin with, that’s a direct attempt at turning the whole thing back onto Kathy.
‘to my opinion’ …amazing that he didn’t send Kathy a bill for his opinion, what did it cost Joan for getting the doctor to write this letter?
(Ruth’s note: I wonder as well. All evidence points to Joan and the doctor being waaay beyond professional ties.)
‘‘ask you to forgive Joan what you think she did wrongly’ …excuse me! what right does this guy have to say such a thing?
‘that her intensions are good’ …intensions my ass, any intelligent person knows that following through is what matters!
‘to have a good friendship with you’ …that falls squarely onto Joan’s shoulders and no one else!
‘it is a useful idea if you write me back.’ …no thank you!
‘that she very much want to solve the problems you have with each other’ …we have heard that before!
So there you have it, the evidence of Joan Wheeler’s own behavior of fabrication, telling lies, doing harassments, and other deeds that are not in her book, Forbidden Family.
Ruth’s additional note – examine carefully Dr. Hoksbergen letter to Kathy – Joan told him that it would cost about $500.00 to ship her belongings to her. Really? Kathy enlisted the help of our father to get her belongings back. My father never owned a car, never learned to drive. So what he did, was TAKE A TAXI-CAB to Joan’s house and get Kathy’s belongings and took them to his house, packed them up and shipped them over to Kathy in three different shipments. On July 7, 1993, the first shipment went out, costing my father $52.75. On August 7, 1993, the second shipment went out, costing $45.95. On November 23, 1993, the third and final shipment went out, costing $52.95. The total my father paid was $150.95 – far less than the $500.00 Joan led Dr. Hoskbergen to believe. And this bullshit happened only 3 years after Joan conned me out of several hundred dollars! Joan is a liar, a thief and a con-artist. She belongs in jail! The letters she wrote to Kathy in 1992 (graphics 1 and 2, are the same kind of nonsense she had feeding me in 19990 and 1991 about the money she stole from me. Apologies, crocodile tears, promises of repayment, excuse after excuse why she couldn’t pay me back, blah, blah, blah, until I finally had enough of her lies and bullshit and turned my back on her completely – I lost around $700.00 to her, and that doesn’t even cover the interest I was paying every month – yes, interest – it wasn’t even MY money Joan stole – it was money I borrowed from the bank – Joan put me into debt – I couldn’t afford to fix my car, I was forced to take a bus in the snow and cold, while Joan drove a car, which she fixed with MY (borrowed) money! As I noted above – this money was in a joint checking account to buy real estate – Joan stole it for her own day-to-day living expenses. After I washed my hands of her in 1991, she went to find another mark – she tried to play Kathy for a fool – she got 50 bucks out of Kathy. Now you know why her birth sisters turned their backs on her. Joan also did NOT return all of Kathy’s belongings: missing are valuable Beatles collectibles: Beatles bubble gum sets, copies of The Beatles Fan Club magazine, a signed sketch by original Beatle member Stuart Sutcliffe. By not returning these items (and others) – Joan is guilty of THEFT. Joan has been asked for years to return these items, I personally saw them in the attic of her house on Swinburne St. in the late 1980’s, so she cannot LIE and say she doesn’t have them.
See the graphics 5a and 5b, below – my father’s receipts! Proof positive that Joan is a liar and a con-artist and LIED to her palsie-walsie, Dr. Rene Hoksbergen. And Dr. Hoksbergen, was so stupid as to be conned by Joan, stuck his nose into our family business, and got a complaint made to his employer, Utrecht University about his unprofessionalism. He apparently didn’t learn his leasson, because in 2006, he was conned by Joan again into writing a forward to her lying book. Unless he wasn’t really conned after all – won’t be the first time a man was drawn into a woman’s web. Just look what Arnold Schwarzenegger did! The bigger they are – the harder they fall. Arnold just fell. Joan just fell. Who’s next? I sent Dr. Hoksbergen a private message via facebook for his explanation and a public apology for his contribution to this lying piece of trash book. He hasn’t responded yet. If he doesn’t, I’ll know my assessment of him is correct.