JOAN WHEELER USES THE ANNIVERSARY OF MY MOTHER’S DEATH TO THROW ANOTHER DIG AT HER BIRTHSISTERS March 27, 2014Posted by Ruth in Joan Wheeler Speak - how Joan views the world, Joan Wheeler's abuse and harassment of her birth family.
Tags: abuse, being downright nasty, blaming people for your own mess, emotional abuse
JOAN WHEELER USES THE ANNIVERSARY OF MY MOTHER’S DEATH TO THROW ANOTHER DIG AT HER BIRTHSISTERS
As usual, Joan has to exploit my mother’s death.
Read what she wrote on her facebook today, March 27, 2014. (mind you the anniversary of my mother’s death is March 28).
at around 11am, Joan writes:
Fifty-eight years ago today, my mother died. She was 30 years old. Mom left behind her husband of 10 years, age 31. Mom left behind five children: me, age 3 months; my sister, age 3; my brother, age 6; my sister, age, 8; my oldest sister, age 9. Mom’s death started a cascading set of events that led to my father relinquishing me to adoption. While I had the idyllic “happy” childhood that this “wonderful better life” provided for me, what happened from 1974 to now has been a life of hell. I cannot for one second say that all things happen for a reason. I do not know why my Mother died. God did not will this. This was not Devine Intervention. This was cancer. Genetic mutations. Nature. Nothing more. Today is the hardest day of the year. I want my Mother. The deaths of all my parents from January, February, and two in March… Two mothers died in March, different years. So today, this is my Mother’s Day. For Genevieve Herr Sippel. I love you, Mom.
and then an hour later, around noon, she writes.
Wow. Did I make a big blunder or what? Yeah. Grief does that to a person. The anniversary of mom’s death is tomorrow. I can’t think straight. Too overwhelmed. Two mothers dying in March is one too many. is it any wonder why I can’t “get my facts straight” as my sisters pound it into my head. Yeah, I missed it by one day. While the death anniversary of my adoptive mother was March 12. Thank you, Christine Monahan.. I wish you could get up to San Fran — want to meet this amazing woman in the flesh!!!!
So, as usual, I’m sleeping then come on the internet to find that I’m raked over the coals for something I didn’t do or say. I woke up at 12:20pm, come downstairs, have my coffee, watch Young and the Restless then turn on the computer, write a brief note to the person who does my schedule at work, go on the internet and see that I and my sisters are vilified because of Joan’s mistake.
Um, Joan – was this truly a sentimental post about you missing your mother? Cos you sure USED it as a big chance to stick it to me, my family and everybody else who made your life a hell from 1974. THIS IS WHY WE DON’T WANT YOU AROUND – YOU JUST CANNOT STOP THE SHIT CAN YOU? AND USING MY MOTHER AND HER DEATH AS A VEHICLE FOR YOUR SHIT!
Joan also writes that she is in a new relationship and he’s a secret for now. Who cares? But – Gert called it – the other day, when another disparaging comment appeared on her blog – and this is typical Joan-manipulation-tactics – she gets involved with a man, sobs her heart out what rotten bitches her sisters are, gets them to come to our blogs to insult us, then sits back to watch this new puppet attack us – while she keeps her hands all squeaky clean. Well, as I said who cares? If this new fella starts harassing me – he will go the way all her other puppets have – thrown to the curb by Joan when the heat gets turned up.
some facebook remarks by Gert and me —
Gert: as I said in some tweets…Joan in her hysteria does NOT help our mother’s soul. Joan is a drama queen always looking for attention…She’s been in ‘seclusion’ BECAUSE she’s got a new MAN, she picked up at a bar…that’s where they all come from. Last june she met ‘the love of her life’ in a bar…when to NM and found out he was a drunk, she was lamenting online in January of THIS YEAR about him and here it’s MARCH and she’s GOT ANOTHER SUCKER, who left a nasty comment on a blog post of mine! He’s going to be another Russ and Brian.
Joan has NO sense of the divine, she refuses to acknowledge her tiny self in the vast universe and until she does she will ALWAYS have these mental sicknesses and mental disturbances that cause her sadness and grief. Sorry…her kind of grief is NOT grief…it’s attention getting. Joan was NOT the only child who’s MOTHER DIED. Remember those that have passed over with fondness…NOT with exploitation means…Joan knows nothing about TRUE honoring of one’s parents.
Ruth: why o why can Joan not post pictures of mom, like I did, and just leave it at that? she can’t – cos she’s a perpetual garbage mouth.
Lesson for Joan Wheeler – lying about people won’t make you happy. February 7, 2014Posted by Ruth in Joan Wheeler's abuse and harassment of her birth family, Lessons in Life, Refuting Joan Wheelers statements.
Tags: abuse, being downright nasty, blaming people for your own mess, dishonesty, Disrespect, embellishing the truth, emotional abuse, false accusations, harassment, harassment of an adoptee's birth family, LIBEL, Lies, Refuting Joan Wheelers statements, SLANDER, spreading untruths
It’s impossible to build one’s own happiness on the unhappiness of others.
So true. So what did you think to accomplish when you published that filthy book full of lies Joan? Yes, you accomplished SOMETHING – you hurt me again and again. Every time I turned a page and read another filthy lie about me – I actually was walking in circles in my kitchen crying when I read your twisting of facts, your put-downs of me being a prospective mother, your disgusting stabbing me in the back twenty years after I got over the initial anger of your dirty deeds to me –
BUT what else did it get you? Your biggest dream (actually an unrealistic fantasy) was that your book was going to be a million dollar best seller and either a TV movie or a Hollywood blockbuster book was going to made of your book – and you would be set for life.
And because you blatantly lied about events in MY life – and I had documented proof of those lies (actual police and court documents, your own harassing letters to me and the envelopes they came in) – YOUR LIES WERE EXPOSED.
Proof of your lies – libel – was sent to the publisher and your book was pulled.
You said once on an internet forum, about two years, ago, that you “wasted 30 years of my life writing a book.” That’s right honey, you did. But you got part of that wrong – you didn’t waste 30 years of your life writing a book – you wasted 30 years of your life TRYING TO KILL OTHER PEOPLE’S HAPPINESS!
What did you think to accomplish when you were harassing me? Did you honestly think my relationship with John would go down the tubes when you sent that lying letter to me saying he got the next door neighbor pregnant? What really happened is that when I showed him the letter – he was disgusted with you. You always claimed you honored him as friend. HA! Well that’s one friend who hates you now.
What did you think to accomplish when you repeatedly called my job in 1994-95 with false accusations of me? And did it again in November 2012? Did you really think I would get fired? – HA! Not only was I NOT fired (because I am innocent of your bullshit lies), but my job now knows you as a freak – a crackpot who has nothing better to do with her time than lie about innocent people.
One other thing that was accomplished Joan – when the truth of your lies were exposed by this blog and Gert’s blog – YOUR REPUTATION IN THE ADOPTION REFORM ACTIVIST COMMUNITY IS NOW SEVERELY COMPROMISED.
And you have only yourself to blame. Nobody put a gun to your head and made you pick up the phone and call my job. Nobody put a gun to your head and made you sent me that lying letter about John. Nobody put a gun to your head and made you type out all those lies in your book.
YOU DID ALL THAT BY YOURSELF. ARE YOU HAPPY JOAN? NO? aww, too bad.
Gert here…yep…Joan’s lies and dirty deeds have become apparent to even those in the adoption reform movement! TRUTH always out wins lies! Joan should have learned how to ‘bury the bodies’ when she decided to KILL HER KIN FOLK! Oh sure, she led a great charge against her kin, when we first learned of her, 30 years in the making, masterpiece! Where’s all those angry adoptees today? Not by Joan’s side. There been a couple of new books on the adoption topics these days and none of them INCLUDE Joan Wheeler! Even the most vocal of the activists do not want to share the printed venue with Joan! She’s now trying to break into a new field…online therapy! Yep! good luck on that!
Gert here again… I was just reading some blog posts and found a comment that Joan left about Joe Soll! Okay Joe just FOUND his mother! Great news, that’s nice for him, but Joan, takes any opportunity for someone else’s spot light to pour out her bullshit that means nothing! In that lying book Joan wrote she USED Joe Soll. I had email exchange with the man and he DENIED what she wrote in the book, we have blogged about this…YET Joan acts as if she is CLEAN… here’s the comment she left…with ALL HER usual misspellings, she can’t even honor her friends with checking her spelling! Her sweetness makes me want to puke! Anyone who can do shit, like she did to her own KIN, and then speak false sweetness and false ‘peace’ to strangers, only proves to the world what a fool she is.
@forbiddenfamily · 2 weeks ago Back then, in the late 80s, Jow began organizing the Marches on Washington. I was there fro three of them. Saddens me that he could have met his mother at the time. So sorry for that loss. But very happy indeed for the wonderful news of NOW! releived for the man who helped so many of us. Knowing you, dear friend, has meant so much for me. May you now know some inner peace.
and have you ever noticed that Joan always talks about the 70s, 80s, 90s she is a HAS BEEN! She has DONE NOTHING IN RECENT HISTORY or currently, cause she’s a liar!
In this post – we show Mr. Joe Soll’s email to Gert, in which he says “I do not need to see the book, Gert. I don’t know what’s going on but no matter what the book says, I am baffled because none of what you asked me has any basis in fact/”
AdoptionHealing.com – AdoptionCrossroads.org – EvilExchange.com” To: Gert Mcqueen Sent: Fri, May 14, 2010 9:52:53 AM Subject: Re: fact finding request, please I never received, nor do I know of the existance of any letters from any person regarding Joan.
here is Joe’s entire email, in which he had copied and pasted Gert’s question and provided an answer:
From: “Joe Soll, LCSW – AdoptionHealing.com – AdoptionCrossroads.org – EvilExchange.com” To: Gert Mcqueen
Sent: Fri, May 14, 2010 9:52:53 AM Subject: Re: fact finding request, please
I never received, nor do I know of the existance of any letters from any person regarding Joan.
Also, in her book, Joan relays a phone conversation with you, pg 311, regarding these alleged letters in which she writes that you did indeed receive them and that you had spoken with Joan about them
(Joe answers): This is patently false.
If you do not have access to her book, but wish to see the pages I am referring, I would gladly snail you copies if you would provide me an address. My sisters and I would greatly apprecitate it if you could shed light on this for us and yourself.
(Joe answers): I do not need to see the book, Gert. I don’t know what’s going on but no matter what the book says, I am baffled because none of what you asked me has any basis in fact/
Feel free to contact me further
Be well, 조살
So, MISS BIG-SHOT ADOPTION REFORMER JOAN WHEELER, WHO FANTASIZED THAT HER BOOK WAS GOING TO BE A REVOLUTION IN THE ADOPTION REFORM COMMUNITY DOESN’T EVEN GET HER BOOK SEEN BY ONE OF THOSE ADOPTION EXPERTS!
to reiterate what Mr. Joe Soll said about her book:
“I do not need to see the book,”
that means, that when he sent that email, May 2010, he had not seen the book yet, nor would he ever, because he was made aware that Joan LIED about him in the book. And he will NEVER see it, because it is dead – having been pulled from publication because of the LIES Joan put in it.
Joan Wheeler deserves NO respect – because she gives no respect February 6, 2014Posted by Ruth in Joan Wheeler's abuse and harassment of her birth family.
Tags: abuse, being downright nasty, blaming people for your own mess, dishonesty, emotional abuse, harassment of an adoptee's birth family, Lies, stupidity, theft
If you want the details of Joan stealing money from me – see this post:
After Joan stole the money from me, the bitch says to me on the phone: “money shouldn’t come between sisters.”
Um, bitch –
THEFT IS WHAT CAME BETWEEN US –
LACK OF RESPECT OF RUTH IS WHAT CAME BETWEEN US
LYING TO AND ABOUT RUTH IS WHAT CAME BETWEEN US.
FUCK YOU JOAN WHEELER – ROT IN HELL.
now go whine to your adoptee buddies how I swear at you on my blog. And how “innocent” you are. How do you sleep at night bitch?
Gert here…Joan is a first class hypocrite. She’s apparently trying to impress a new crowd as she ventures into the realm of on-line therapy! But, she can NEVER remove her past from her presence! There’s a lot of things that ‘shouldn’t come between sisters’…like her VIOLATING my parental rights, like VIOLATING my children’s trust in their parents, like her reporting false child abuse on me, like her seeing my religious is damaging my mental health, like her attempting to instigate trouble between myself and other family members, like her asking my adult daughter to commit a crime, like her saying to me she ‘loves me’ all the while knowing how she was going to write about that phone call in the book, and like her WRITING a 600 page book of lies against EVERY MEMBER OF THE BIRTH FAMILY. Yep, Joan is right…THINGS should not come between sisters…she isn’t a sister of ours.
Oh NO! Gert and I are collecting movies on DVD! Quick now, throw us in jail, Joan Wheeler! November 6, 2013Posted by Ruth in Joan Wheeler Speak - how Joan views the world, Joan Wheeler's abuse and harassment of her birth family, Lies in the book Forbidden Family, Refuting Joan Wheelers statements.
Tags: abuse, being downright nasty, emotional abuse, harassment, Lies, whining
Oh NO! Gert and I are collecting movies on DVD! Quick now, throw us in jail, Joan Wheeler!
On page 302 of her filthy lying book, Joan Wheeler condemns me for “collecting movies.” She uses it in the context that because I didn’t have kids I was using my own money on other things. But she said it in a very rotten way. “It’s a good thing she didn’t have any children.”
Yes, at the time, I would go to the store and buy a pack of VCR tapes and tape movies off the TV. However, at that time, I had also acquired an adult dog- DOG, not cat, Joan. Her name was Brandy, three years old, a 65 pound Siberian Husky/Alaskan Malamute mix. We got her from some neighbor friends who were breaking up.
Despite my hobby of “collecting movies,” I spent over $100.00 on a dog house for my Brandy. I didn’t have a car at the time. I ordered it through the JC Penney catalog and had it delivered to my house – at extra cost for that delivery. It was so cute – a snap-together resin plastic dog house, terra cotta in color with a green roof – shaped like a log cabin with a slate roof.
Excuse me Joan – who the hell are YOU to make a comment on how I spend MY money? Money that I earn by busting my ass on something called A JOB! – Something YOU were too lazy to get. ALSO, I showed that despite my hobby of collecting movies, I was a responsible dog parent in providing the best of care for her. I took better care of her than her previous owners, who fed her commercial food for pet rodents (hamster food) with kitchen grease poured on it. Within two months, Brandy’s coat thickened and shone right up. Other neighbors noticed it and complimented me. I also bought toys for her, she got the best medical care too when she needed it – she was up all the time on her shots.
O, but in September 1986 – Joan spent money on tickets to see The Monkees when they appeared in Buffalo. Never mind she had already seen them in July 1986. But she simply had to see them a second time. Then a week later, she’s on the phone with me, crying – her electricity was getting shut off. Now they don’t shut your electricity off unless you haven’t paid it for a few months. And here is Joan, with a one year old son at home, 8 months pregnant with her daughter – and instead of paying the electric bill to provide for her child(ren) she goes to a rock concert. AND HAS THE NERVE TO WRITE IN HER FILTHY BOOK THAT I WOULD NOT BE A GOOD PARENT BECAUSE I BOUGHT BLANK VCR TAPES??? TALK ABOUT A HYPOCRITICAL BITCH!
In 2001, when Peter Jackson’s film version of the first installment of The Lord of the Rings came out, I made the switch to DVDs. I picked up a good player and have been buying DVDs ever since. I have the complete TV series of Star Trek, (original), The Animated Series, and Enterprise. Missing only one of the movies, missing only one season of ST Voyager, and have two seasons of Deep Space Nine and three seasons of ST The Next Generation.
I also have the complete TV series of Superman, Remington Steele, The Flash, Alien Nation, Buck Rogers, Earth 2, and some of The West Wing, The Paper Chase, Hill Street Blues, Fame. And the first four seasons of Ghost Hunters. I also pre-ordered (and paid for) via one of the cast members – the last season of Ghost Hunters International, which will be autographed by a couple of the cast members.
I also have the mini series Roots, Roots 2, Brideshead Revisited, Shaka Zulu, Captains and the Kings, Cosmos, Centennial, Shogun, The First Churchills. And movies! – I have gotten lots of movies, and music DVDs. And even got a music DVD that I ordered thru and he autographed for me – from my long time crush Jon Anderson of Yes. And my husband John is building up his collection too!
Well, lately, since she is now retired, Gert has been collecting DVD movies. She always enjoyed watching Star Trek, but was busy with her kids to really sit down and watch it. She recently went out and got all three season of the original series and a set of all the Star Trek movies.
From yesterday (November 5, 2013) to this morning – we were having a conversation on facebook, concerning the new fan-made Star Trek series, “Star Trek Continues.” This most excellent series just wrapped up principal photography on their second episode. Their first episode “Pilgrim of Eternity” is available for viewing on youtube. It is very good. Gert was telling me that she wanted to get through the DVDs that she already bought before she got into this series.
My last comment in our conversation is here and sums up what I truly believe was (and is) Joan’s motive in constantly putting me down for MY own life and financial decisions – JEALOUSY, PURE JEALOUSY! She looks at me, even though I have my own day-to-day struggles, and sees that I have direction and meaning in my life. HER own life has no meaning or direction.
Here is my last comment to Gert on facebook:
“oh no! just thought of something! You and I are “collecting movies!” – Better hide that info from the Nameless One, lest she condemn us for it – as she condemned me for collecting movies (particularly horror) in her book. Seems to me she was letting her f’ing jealousy come out in that condemnation. SHE had no job (lazy ass), HER husband was not bringing in the $$$ like John was, John and I didn’t have kids to suck up all our $$$, so whatever John and I were using our own hard-earned $$$ was automatically condemned by her.”
yep Joan spend decades writing about what the birth sisters did or didn’t do…like she’s in our minds…I thought that Joan wrote/writes about HER ADOPTION so why is it that she KNOWS what is right/best/wrong with us or anyone else…Joan is just a little god looking for a following! Sorry I’m the star of MY MOVIE and no one gets to write lies about me and get away with it
oh absolutely Gert – that book has hardly ANY thing on her own life – but a lot of observations on OUR lives – particularly mine.
Joan calls me Brenda in her book. Almost every other page is “BRENDA this, BRENDA that.” Was it a book for bitching about BRENDA (me) or a book about JOAN and her adoption.
Oh – I just had a memory flash! Somewhere in her stupid book, and I don’t feel like looking for the exact page right now, Joan also condemned me for whining that I didn’t have my own computer with internet at home. NOPE, I never whined. I had told her in 2003/2004 that I did not have a computer at home and relied on public computers in libraries. I could not afford to buy a home computer because I was paying a mortgage. I was (and still am) a responsible property owner. The mortgage and taxes get paid first. Then the utilities, then the car note and car insurance and then credit card bills and other bills. Then come groceries, prescriptions, food and supplies for my cat, cleaning supplies and other household goods. After all of that – THEN I’ll pick up a DVD.
My mortgage was paid off in March 2006. In June 2006, I bought my first home computer, printer, and obtained internet service. John and I also got our first cell phones at that time. In 2009, our roof sprung a leak, and we needed a total tear-off and new roof. We financed a second mortgage to pay for the new roof. We also put on a new porch three years ago, we just replaced the storm windows in the front, and are doing interior work. In time, we will put on new siding.
My husband is retired now, but once a week, still goes into the Army/Navy Surplus Store to help out in the store, to keep active, and bring in a little extra cash. I still have my job, and we are both doing hands-on work on our house and property.
What anybody does with their own time, lives or money is nobody else’s damn business. For Joan to constantly be making comments on RUTH’S life, and RUTH’S possessions in her own book is a clear indication of what I said above – JOAN IS JEALOUS OF ME – pure and simple.
Tags: adoption, being downright nasty, blaming people for your own mess, emotional abuse, false accusations, harassment of an adoptee's birth family, SLANDER, spreading untruths, theft
why this blog –
I already have a page – the reason for this blog. Let us go over it again.
Joan Wheeler, born Doris Sippel, my sister was given up for adoption after my mother died, due to child care issues. She was raised as an only child, spoiled rotten, never having the word NO said to her.
In 1974, we were reunited with her. Within a few short years, Joan’s overbearing attitude, her stealing, her lying, her interference in some of out lives, caused us to, one by one, turn our backs on her.
Boundaries and limits were set by various members of the birth family, which Joan repeatedly ignored. By 1989, she had surfaced as a THIEF. A joint checking account, funded by me, to be used for real estate purposes, (Joan and I were thinking of buying rental property together), was dipped into time and again for Joan’s living expenses. Hamburgers at the mall, Joan’s car repairs. This was not what I put the money up for. When we dissolved the “partnership” I was shorted out a lot of money – even taking into account monies spent on real estate brokers, appraisal fees, etc. Those I well accepted, as that was the agreement. I did NOT agree to foot Joan’s living expenses. Joan’s husband had a job. My paycheck goes for me, not anybody else. In December 1990, a refund from a lawyer was agreed to be turned over to me to go towards what Joan owed me. Instead, Joan called me up and informed me she was keeping the money to provide xmas for her kids. Again, that was not what my money was for – you got kids? Foot your holidays for them via your own money, NOT your sister’s. I was lied to, stolen from. This spoiled little brat Joan, USED me. I told her to get the hell away from me and stay away.
Over the course of the next few years, I was harassed left and right. Phone calls and letters to my job, accusing me of computer fraud occurred almost daily for six months. Joan called child abuse on herself, posing as me. Joan wrote to various elected officials and government agencies telling them that I had a criminal record – which I do not. I myself received a letter from Joan telling that my husband had gotten the next door neighbor pregnant – when the house was vacant!
And she wonders why I’m pissed at her.
THEN she writes and self-publishes her “autobiography. And in this trashy filthy book, is more lies about me – slander – and again, accusing me of computer fraud at my job, that I have a criminal record and other filthy shit.
I created this blog to take each and every one of the lies in Joan’s filthy book and expose it for what it is – a lie.
I have provided actual court documents that prove that Joan lied about me. I have scanned and posted to this blog the actual letter that Joan sent to Albany NY that said that in 1993 I was sentenced to probation. She wrote in the filthy book that I was sentenced to a one year order of protection for various harassments of her and her mother. I scanned the court document with the dates that prove it was for six months over some annoyance phone calls that she engineered for me to make. She forged her own 10 year old son’s handwriting and sent a letter to my house (supposedly her son). When I called her to ask about it, she said, “hold on a minute.” and hung up. I called back and she did it again. THEN she falsely lodged a police complaint that I called her and hung up on her. So she got a 6 month order of protection against me. BUT she says in the book it was for one year – and for worse than phone calls. And I scanned and provided the forged letter and all documents to prove I am not the harasser that Joan claims that I am.
Her little friends get on their high horse and lamblast me for telling the truth and “destroying” Joan and her book.
Well, too damn bad. That book was destroyed by me and my sister Gert. BECAUSE IT CONTAINED LIES ABOUT NOT ONLY ME – BUT OTHER MEMBERS OF OUR FAMILY.
Joan is the worst kind of slime ever! She is a kin-killer. Do you know what that means? It means what it says! She stabbed HER OWN FAMILY in the heart and back.
I sent my documents to Trafford Publication, the publisher of Joan’s book. Joan had signed a legal contract with them – that stated that the contents of the book were the truth. My documents proved that she lied.
If it can be destroyed by the truth, it deserves to be destroyed by the truth. – – Carl Sagan
It’s as plain and simple as that. If you don’t like it Joan – too dam bad.
Yes, that’s go over it again…
what made Joan think she could interfere with my parental rights with my minor children?
why couldn’t Joan take NO for an answer to a repeat of a sexual threesome?
what made Joan think she could call child abuse on me, TWICE, because SHE didn’t like my parenting or the word NO or because…pick out something…doesn’t matter to her, anything would work?
why did Joan speak with fork-tongue; nice to my face yet within hours condemn my religion and my mental health?
why did Joan attempt to get my daughter to commit a crime? Joan wanted to pursue a medical malpractice suit regarding HER daughter and since MY daughter worked with medical records Joan believed SHE could get MY daughter to commit a crime for her!?
Why did Joan write me a letter asking me to CALL her to warn me about some danger…only to yell at me NOT to call her?
Why did Joan tell me, on the phone, after brother died and father gravely ill, that SHE LOVED ME, then twist everything in a lying garbage book?
Because Joan is a sick bitch that’s way…
this is not over till JOAN takes down EACH AND EVERY HATE BLOG SHE AND HER FRIENDS HAVE AGAINST BLOOD RELATIVES.
2. Ruth – August 21, 2013 Gert said: ” Why did Joan write me a letter asking me to CALL her to warn me about some danger…only to yell at me NOT to call her?”
What Gert refers to is an incident that happened in 1998. But let’s back up to 1994-95 – When Joan called child Abuse on herself (Dec. 1994). This was right in the middle of the time she was calling my employer with false accusations trying to get me fired. The child abuse call was made and it was my fiance (now husband) who was named as an abuser of Joan’s children. The letter she sent to Albany NY, was written Dec. 31, 1994. During the months of January/February 1995 she was writing letters to the mayor of Buffalo, and other people slandering me. Then she sent me the copies of those letters. I hauled her into court and the judge dismissed my charges saying “sisters should get along.” The day after that, I went down to the district attorney’s office to complain. One of the assistant DA’s told me that they had better things to do. And she told me to stay away from Joan. I told her, that I would be happy to, as long as Joan also stays away from and stop writing letter about me. The Asisstant DA assured me that she would tell Joan the same thing. Which is what she did and I had three and a half years of peace – until September 1998.
I received a registered letter from Joan – the envelope was addressed to me and my fiance John. Inside was a letter addressed to Gert. Why was my fiance’s name on the envelope and WHY WAS JOAN CONTACTING ME AFTER AN ASSITANT DA TOLD HER NOT TO? Because Joan is a spoiled little brat who will NOT take NO for an answer – even if that word NO comes from law enforcement!
The letter was about some guy who bumped into Joan’s ex-husband in South Carolina. This guy was bad-mouthing Gert. So? A conversation happens in South Carolina, and Ruth, minding her own business in Buffalo, suddenly gets dragged into it! AFTER JOAN WAS TOLD BY LAW ENFORCEMENT NOT TO CONTACT RUTH.
The letter was to be sent to Gert and I contacted Gert and told her about the letter and gave Gert the phone number provided in the letter. Gert called the number and Joan yelled at her not to call her.
JOAN, IF YOU DIDN’T WANT GERT TO CALL YOU – WHY DID YOU SEND ME A LETTER TELLING ME TO TELL GERT TO CALL YOU?
I think Joan was trying to set Gert up the way she set me up in 1993 with that forged letter from her “son” and caught me in an annoyance phone call trap – she wanted Gert to call her, knowing the call would be traced and Joan wanted to run to the cops and claim Gert was harassing her.
This is the shit we have had to deal with from Joan – her little schemes – and she didn’t do it to just me and Gert – she did it to my cousin Gail – WHILE GAIL WAS BATTLING CANCER! KIN-KILLER! That’s what you are Joan – lower than then lowest. And another cousin also had his job contacted with false accusations about him – because his aunt – my cousin Gail told him to stay away from Joan, and he stopped accepting her calls. For this she tried to destroy his job.
And she tried to fuck with my job again just recently.
Joan is a fucking devious evil bitch.
Joan Wheeler mocks infertility, and her own sister’s miscarriage September 12, 2012Posted by Ruth in Contradictions of Joan Wheeler, Joan Wheeler's abuse and harassment of her birth family.
Tags: abuse, being downright nasty, contradictions, Disrespect, emotional abuse, hatred of infertile women, religious intolerance
I placed a comment on my sister Gert’s latest blogpost “Is infertility, by nature or by force, any reason to adopt? or is it a reason for mockery, by Joan Wheeler?”
But I also want to place it here, in it’s own post. Gert brings up the subject of how angry adoptees want everyone to feel sorry for their pain, yet those same angry adoptees don’t give a damn about anyone else’s pain. They actually MOCK people’s pain. And Joan jumps right on board the mockery train. here is my comment:
Joan routinely slams people’s religions – slams people’s choices in life. In her book, she slams poor people (yet laments she’s poor – oh that makes sense), slams people living on Buffalo’s East Side (even though she lived there too). All she ever does is MOCK people for this, for that, for ANYTHING! Then she wonders why NObody ever takes her seriously and runs the hell the away from her.
I myself am an infertile woman, and was on the receiving end of condesending remarks by Joan – LESS THAN A YEAR AFTER I MISCARRIED MY SON. We were on the phone in May 1987 (I know the month and year – I was packing, moving into the house I live in now). She had just gotten back from one her adoption conferences and started talking about infertility. I told her that I did not want to talk about. I was still greiving my son, who I lost after years of trying to get pregnant. She ignored my request and kept right on talking. I told her again. She ignored me again. I told a third time, a fourth time. She kept right on running her mouth and then made the statement: “I know more about infertility than you think I do.” I slammed the phone down and burst into tears.
What does she know about infertility? Book statistics? Listening to other people? Yeah, Joan knows ABOUT infertitly, but does not know the PAIN of infertility.
Come on Joan, tell the world how your rotten birth sisters never took the time to “understand” you, but don’t tell the world how you stab them in the back and more cruelly, stab them in the heart.
This rotten statement to me was made in 1987, and then in her book published in 2009, Joan continues to mock my infertility and miscarriage. She writes “at one point she (me) CLAIMED to want to have children,” – even though in 1983, while she was pregnant with her first child, Joan borrowed my books on pregnancy, breastfeeding, baby care. Why would I have those books if I merely CLAIMED to want children. But elsewhere in the book, she says that I was going to a fertility clinic. I never went to a fertility clinic (does she never do any RESEARCH?) – But that’s not the point – the point is – she contradicts herself. If I merely had CLAIMED to want to get pregnant, then why would I be at a fertility clinic?
Then she mocks me further in her book, because I made a rhetorical question “I don’t know how you find time to raise your kids and do all your writing?” Joan mocks me because I do a lot reading, and watch horror movies. Then she writes, “It’s just as well she didn’t get pregnant.”
Way to go Joan. Slam me, slam my dead son. Slam my infertility. Slam my life choices in recreation. Then slam me some more because I never took the time to “understand you.” Oh – go to hell Joan.