Joan Wheeler mocks infertility, and her own sister’s miscarriage September 12, 2012Posted by Ruth in Contradictions of Joan Wheeler, Joan Wheeler's abuse and harassment of her birth family.
Tags: abuse, being downright nasty, contradictions, Disrespect, emotional abuse, hatred of infertile women, religious intolerance
I placed a comment on my sister Gert’s latest blogpost “Is infertility, by nature or by force, any reason to adopt? or is it a reason for mockery, by Joan Wheeler?”
But I also want to place it here, in it’s own post. Gert brings up the subject of how angry adoptees want everyone to feel sorry for their pain, yet those same angry adoptees don’t give a damn about anyone else’s pain. They actually MOCK people’s pain. And Joan jumps right on board the mockery train. here is my comment:
Joan routinely slams people’s religions – slams people’s choices in life. In her book, she slams poor people (yet laments she’s poor – oh that makes sense), slams people living on Buffalo’s East Side (even though she lived there too). All she ever does is MOCK people for this, for that, for ANYTHING! Then she wonders why NObody ever takes her seriously and runs the hell the away from her.
I myself am an infertile woman, and was on the receiving end of condesending remarks by Joan – LESS THAN A YEAR AFTER I MISCARRIED MY SON. We were on the phone in May 1987 (I know the month and year – I was packing, moving into the house I live in now). She had just gotten back from one her adoption conferences and started talking about infertility. I told her that I did not want to talk about. I was still greiving my son, who I lost after years of trying to get pregnant. She ignored my request and kept right on talking. I told her again. She ignored me again. I told a third time, a fourth time. She kept right on running her mouth and then made the statement: “I know more about infertility than you think I do.” I slammed the phone down and burst into tears.
What does she know about infertility? Book statistics? Listening to other people? Yeah, Joan knows ABOUT infertitly, but does not know the PAIN of infertility.
Come on Joan, tell the world how your rotten birth sisters never took the time to “understand” you, but don’t tell the world how you stab them in the back and more cruelly, stab them in the heart.
This rotten statement to me was made in 1987, and then in her book published in 2009, Joan continues to mock my infertility and miscarriage. She writes “at one point she (me) CLAIMED to want to have children,” – even though in 1983, while she was pregnant with her first child, Joan borrowed my books on pregnancy, breastfeeding, baby care. Why would I have those books if I merely CLAIMED to want children. But elsewhere in the book, she says that I was going to a fertility clinic. I never went to a fertility clinic (does she never do any RESEARCH?) – But that’s not the point – the point is – she contradicts herself. If I merely had CLAIMED to want to get pregnant, then why would I be at a fertility clinic?
Then she mocks me further in her book, because I made a rhetorical question “I don’t know how you find time to raise your kids and do all your writing?” Joan mocks me because I do a lot reading, and watch horror movies. Then she writes, “It’s just as well she didn’t get pregnant.”
Way to go Joan. Slam me, slam my dead son. Slam my infertility. Slam my life choices in recreation. Then slam me some more because I never took the time to “understand you.” Oh – go to hell Joan.
I am so sick of Joan Wheeler’s whining about her adoption and her birth certificate and nobody understands her and –and — I’m going to throw up now May 1, 2011Posted by Ruth in Contradictions of Joan Wheeler, Joan Wheeler Speak - how Joan views the world, Joan Wheeler's abuse and harassment of her birth family, Refuting Joan Wheelers statements.
Tags: abuse, adoption, adoption reform, being downright nasty, birth certificates, contradictions, crybabies, emotional abuse, false accusations, false accusations of sexual abuse, harassment of an adoptee's birth family, hatred, hatred of adopive parents, hatred of infertile women, Laura Cummings, Lies, The Buffalo News, torture, whining
On June 10, 2011, The Buffalo News finally published Joan’s letter, proving her whine about Buffalo being a conservative city worthless – see Joan, if you would SHUT UP your stupid insults on everyone and everybody and GIVE PEOPLE and The Buffalo News A CHANCE – they just might come around to doing what you want. Jumping up and down and screaming and yelling that they won’t publish your letter made you just look like the whiney brat that you are – GROW UP!
“You can look back at your past, and feel sorry for yourself – or you can look back and see how it served you.” — author unknown
BEADY Eyes are everywhere, so qwitcher bitchin!
On Friday, April 29, 2011, Joan Wheeler makes an announcement that she had submitted a letter to the editor of our local newspaper, but she didn’t want to post it before its publication, to prevent her birth sister’s “beedie” eyes from seeing it. roflmao! This “accomplished” writer doesn’t even know how to spell “beady!” – Okay, we’re all human, we all make spelling and grammar mistakes, and the occasional typo on the internet. I just had to point Joan’s faux pas out because she’s always so full of herself and her own “self-importance” and “importance” to the adoption reform community. She just needs to be taken down a peg or two. And of course she needs to be taken down, because AGAIN, she insults her birth sisters. She doesn’t like the fact that we, her birth sisters are monitoring what she writes about us. We know for a fact, despite her saying that she doesn’t, she DOES read this blog. And so do some of her adoptee buddies. Do we call them names bcause they read our blog?
Listen, it’s the internet – you’re going to get all kinds of people, wanted or not, reading what you write. So suck it up. But see, Joan just loves to bitch. She goes on to say that The Buffalo News won’t publish her editorial. How does she know? She must have called them up and bugged them. I will tell you the procedures The Buffalo News has for accepting a letter via email or snail mail. You must provide them with your name, address and phone number. If they are interested in your letter, they will call you on the phone, to verify that you did indeed submit the letter. Sometimes this phone call may take a week in coming. If you get no phone call after a week, you can be sure that your letter will not get published. They do NOT contact you to tell you that they are not going to publish your letter. And sometimes, even though you get a phone call from them, they still do not publish your letter. I know this, because I have submitted letters to the Buffalo News and some have been published, others have not. I don’t get all bent out of shape about it – because I have other venues that I can turn to.
What was Joan’s letter about? The usual redundant whine about her birth certificate. With four short additional sentances about President Obama and his birth certificate. Now Pres. Obama produced his birth certificate on Wednesday, April 27. And Joan is complaining on Saturday, April 30 that the Buffalo News won’t publish her letter. Geez, Joan, give the editorial staff a break – maybe they will call you on Monday!!
But I have feeling that they probably won’t publish her letter? Why? Because they have published letters of Joan’s in the past – and about the same subject! It’s called a NEWSpaper, Joan, your letter hardly contained anything NEW, just the same tired whine that Joan moans about day in and day out, ad nauseum. And the newspaper does not HAVE to publish her letters, my letters, or anybody else’s letter. That’s a fact of life Joan, accept it.
And people, yes, The Buffalo News HAS published letters of Joan’s in the past. she even has some of them posted on her blog. And as for her charge that we live in a conservative city and the newspaper won’t publish her letter – um she admits on her blog that they HAVE published her letters. – See there, another LIE from Joan Wheeler. And if they won’t publish you anymore Joan, I suggest get another venue – how about Artvoice? And the other grass roots news publications in around Buffalo. oh oh – I did it now. Joan will probably go and make a PEST out of herself to those publications. That is the real reason that I suspect The Buffalo News didn’t publish her letter – they probably saw her email and said “oh no, it’s that Joan Wheeler nut again” But then again, this is all pure speculation – Joan may be pleasantly surprised on Monday or Tuesday and get that phone call from The Buffalo News and by next Saturday, open up her newspaper (or check online), and see her letter published. I won’t bother to read it – I’ve seen it before. And so have the editors of the Buffalo News. Because Joan repeats herself over and over and over and over and over and over. But she never gets her point across to the important people. And neither do any of the other angry adoptees. Why? Because they are so full of their anger, they don’t know how to talk to people. I have seen Joan and another adoptee post at some internet sites, and the moderators have to tell them to stop swearing. I have seen Joan totally removed from the Huffington Post.
Yes, any of my readers who on Friday read my posts about the crap lies that Joan spread on The Huffington Post, when you clicked on the links in my post, and got the message “This profile has been removed,” that’s because Joan was REMOVED from The Huffington Post for violating that site’s rules and violating human civility and privacy customs and rules – yes – she went online and accused my grandfather of being a sexual predator, my grandfather, who has been dead since 1959, two years after Joan was adopted out of our family, and Joan NEVER met, had his reputation smeared by this bitch called Joan Wheeler! Further, Joan said that I, and my sisters were sexually molested by our grandfather. This is a LIE! And even if it were true – what kind of bitch spread this shit on the internet? – The BITCH called Joan Wheeler – that’s who.
And YES, We Sippel Sisters contacted The Huffington Post and alerted them to this abuse! And within a half hour – Joan was KICKED OFF THE HUFFINGTON POST!
Joan, you need to control the diarrhea of your mouth. NO ONE is going to take you seriously when you talk shit like that. And that goes for the other angry adoptees as well, who bore people to death with their anger, their self-pitying angst, their refusal to GROW UP and see that other people are in pain too! Oh boo hoo – I was adopted. My amom is a BITCH! Yeah, well the world is full of bitches. And god forbid that their amom was a rape victim and they unfortunately were the product of a rape, and the amom couldn’t handle raising the child, to be constantly reminded of the RAPE. Oh boo hoo, the child was adopted – they care about the rape victims pain? You know, it may have been more than just a simple forcing of the woman- it may have been extremely VIOLENT. Do those adoptees care? No – they don’t see an amom as a human being who has pain, and suffers too. AND MAKES AN ALL TOO HUMAN THING CALLED A MISTAKE! Is Joan or any other adoptee MISTAKE- FREE? What gives them (or anyone) the right to hurt a human being just because they themselves have been hurt? When you go around spreading hate against adoptive parents and infertile people, you are not helping your cause, all you’re accomplishing is turning people against you.
Yes, there are some toads out there who don’t care about their children – we just locked one bitch up who after years of abusing her biological disabled daughter, killed her. She also encouraged the girl’s half brother to sexually assault her and on the day of Laura Cummings death, her brother was told by their mother to pour scalding water on her, then she was raped AGAIN, then her mother strangled her. SOMEONE should have adopted Laura! god help me, I wish I could have. That poor woman, for all her 23 years was TORTURED. Oh – did I say that horrible word? ADOPTION! yes and I’m proud of it. Joan, grow up. You are not the only human on this planet to have experienced pain. You are just not that important.
Please google Laura Cummings – walk one minute in that girl’s shoes – then shut up about your friggin adoption pain. Fucking crybabies.
from The Buffalo News: By Jay Tokasz and Gene Warner NEWS STAFF REPORTERS
Published: February 27, 2010, 10:08 AM
A good night for Laura Cummings meant being allowed to sleep on the kitchen floor in her family’s North Collins home.
Usually in the weeks leading up to her death, she was forced to sleep shackled to a metal chair with a sack over her face.
Days were even more nightmarish for the 23-year-old mentally disabled woman, who was held captive and brutalized, allegedly by her own mother and half brother, according to an Erie County Grand Jury indictment returned Friday. Cummings’ short life ended Jan. 21 with a long, tortuous death and a trail of missed chances to get her to safety.
A grand jury indicted Cummings’ mother, Eva M. Cummings, 51, and her half brother, Luke J. Wright, 31, on charges related to the homicide, but authorities continued to be confounded by the apparent lack of community concern for the defenseless woman’s welfare.
“There were a lot of people who knew what was going on and said nothing, and that is a sad commentary on the human condition,” said District Attorney Frank A. Sedita III.
Clues and reports about mistreatment inside the apartment at 2052 Sherman Ave. popped up frequently over the years. Siblings and other relatives said they called Child Protective Services and Adult Protective Services. Whispers floated around town, including at the food pantry, that Cummings was being tied up at home.
“This is the problem today and nobody wants to get involved,” added Caroline Lee, who lives down the street from the Cummings apartment.
The pantry was one of the few places in town where Laura Cummings, a petite woman with short brown hair who rarely made eye contact with people, was seen in public away from her home.
Lee called Laura Cummings’ younger brother, Richard, about the suspected abuse, and Richard contacted Erie County Adult Protective Services. “They never went inside the household and they never filed for a warrant to go inside,” said Richard Cummings, who is serving in the Air Force and is stationed in North Carolina. “I’m wondering why … Adult Protective Services didn’t do anything about it.”
Instead, the abuse intensified over the last few months of Laura’s life, said investigators. “Starting in November, there’s a significant escalation of her debasement as a human being,” Senior Trial Counsel Thomas M. Finnerty of the DA’s Office said. “It was happening on a daily or nightly basis.”
Finnerty, who has prosecuted a number of heinous crimes in his 17 years in the DA’s office, called it “the worst case I’ve ever seen.” “It’s sadistic, and it’s allegedly sustained over a long period of time,” he said.
That was especially true of the unlawful imprisonment of Laura Cummings, in the weeks preceding her death.
“She’s restrained more often than she’s not,”Sheriff’s Capt. Ronald L. Kenyon said.
At other times, she was treated as an inanimate object, draped with a blanket so that visitors who stopped by the apartment wouldn’t know she was there, according to authorities.
Eva Cummings and Luke Wright were indicted on a total of 15 charges in connection with the suffocation death of Laura Cummings. They are expected to be arraigned at 2 p.m. Monday before Erie County Court Judge Sheila A. DiTullio.
Eva Cummings faces a second-degree murder charge, while her son is charged with five sexual assault charges. Both are accused of using a broomstick to sexually attack the young woman, as well as forcing her to touch her own waste and scalding her with hot water, according to the indictment papers.
Mother and son also are accused of unlawfully imprisoning Laura Cummings because of her mental disability — an elevated hate crime charge. “It’s a hate crime because it’s motivated in whole or substantial part by the belief or perception regarding the victim’s disability,” Sedita said.
Eva Cummings could face a possible sentence of 83 years to life on five charges, while her son could face 142 years to life on 10 charges, prosecutors said. The charges, based on extensive investigation by four Erie County sheriff’s detectives and statements from both suspects, paint an extremely troubling portrait of the alleged abuse against the young woman who talked with a speech impediment, had difficulty swallowing food and was said to have the mental capacity of a pre-teenage girl.
Sedita and Kenyon praised sheriff’s Detectives Gregory McCarthy, Dennis Fitzgibbon, Matthew Noecker and Jack Graham.
The efforts of the Sheriff’s Department were dogged, Sedita said.
“They didn’t stop. They interviewed basically the whole town of North Collins.”
Both mother and son are charged with unlawful imprisonment and endangering the welfare of a mentally disabled person.
“If the allegations are true, it is clear that the defendants did not treat Laura as a human being,” said Sedita. “In fact, if these allegations are true, one wonders if either one of them even considered Laura to be a human being.”
Laura Cummings’ tragic life might have gone in a different direction on several occasions, starting when she was a youngster, according to various sources. As a child, she and other siblings were placed with foster families in Florida that tried unsuccessfully to adopt the children, said Patricia Wright, Laura’s half-sister.
The Cummings household, in North Collins and prior to that in Olean, was well-known to Child Protective Services in Erie and Cattaraugus counties, family members said.
Patricia Wright, 27, said she reported abuse to Erie County Child Protective Services and Erie County Family Court more than a decade ago. “I stopped talking to them when I was 17 years old because there was nothing being done,” said Wright, who was legally adopted by a family friend and is pursuing a bachelor’s degree in forestry management. “I kept trying to tell them, You need to get those kids out of there.’ And they said, ‘No there’s nothing we can do.’ “
Patricia Wright said she was physically abused for years, resulting in a broken ankle and cracked vertebrae in her back. “I would get hit with baseball bats, spoons, anything that mom could grab a hold of,” she said. “We got hurt every day. She didn’t take us to the hospital.”
She was even locked in a closet for a week, and her brother, Luke, sneaked her bread and water, she said. After spending time at a facility for teenagers, Patricia Wright was legally adopted by Roland Grotke, a neighbor of her grandparents in East Otto. She said she tried to return to the home and rescue Laura, but was rebuffed by her mother.
“I knew my Mom was kind of off upstairs,” said Patricia Wright. “I knew she was incapable of taking care of a person like Laura, who needed that extra help.” Neither Richard Cummings nor Patricia Wright had been allowed to visit Laura Cummings in recent years, they said.
more on this sad case. poor child.
A Challenge to Joan Wheeler – Would You Please Explain the Various Court Documents and YOUR own Letters That Prove YOU are a LIAR? November 23, 2010Posted by Ruth in a. What is demanded from Joan Wheeler - the purpose of this blog., Black and White Evidence of Joan Wheeler's Lies: Letters, Court Documents, Contradictions of Joan Wheeler, Joan Wheeler Speak - how Joan views the world, Joan Wheeler's abuse and harassment of her birth family, Lies in the book Forbidden Family, Refuting Joan Wheelers statements.
Tags: abuse, adoption, being downright nasty, dishonesty, Disrespect, emotional abuse, false accusations, harassment of an adoptee's birth family, hatred of infertile women, infertilty, Lies, Refuting Joan Wheelers statements, spreading untruths
Joan keeps repeating herself over and over and over again that she is NOT a liar. But in my last post about how she has documented FOUR different years that ONE false child abuse call was made in, I posted ACTUAL COURT DOCUMENTS and two of JOAN’S OWN LETTERS that PROVE WITH OUT A SHADOW OF A DOUBT THAT JOAN IS A LIAR!!!
Joan keeps saying that her birth sisters are “bothering” her. But she never says specifically HOW! I have addressed this before on this blog. She either ignores this, or comes up with a new lie! And when that lie is exposed, she won’t come back and explain it. I have caught her in several lies and misrepresentations in her book and her blog. And when I have provided the PROOF of the lie or the misrepresentation, she will NOT explain the lie, but just blindly blunder on and keep saying that she is NOT a liar!
How do you explain her insistence that her book is truthful when she says that she signed a complaint against me in February 1993, but I provide the actual court document that has her signature next to a date in July 1993?
How do you explain the fact that she says that she NEVER wrote harassing letters to hurt me, yet I provide an actual letter that she wrote to my husband and mother in law, in which she urges him to leave me.
How do you explain the fact that in her book she refers to my pet Brandy as a cat, yet I provide actual City of Buffalo animal license that proves that Brandy was a DOG! This proves that 1. Joan is a liar. 2. Joan doesn’t know what she is talking about. 3. Her book is poorly researched. 4. Her book is NOT truthful.
How do you explain the fact that on the internet she keeps saying that she obtained a one year order of protection against me, when I provide the actual COURT DOCUMENT that says it was for six months? And how do you explain the fact that she wrote letters to Albany New York on December 31, 1994 and to the financial director of my employer and told them that I was placed on probation? But it was NOT probation – it was an order of protection! These are two very different things. I was NOT placed on probation – I was given a restraining order – to restrain from contacting Joan. But Joan contacts me – The restraining order was in summer of 1993, yet in spring of 1994, she’s contacting my husband! And in 1999, she’s writing letters to me! She admits so in her book! And admits that she used a friend’s return address to do so! Oh, but Joan is not harassing me, no, no. Just writing letters to tell me my husband fathered a daughter in a vacant house.
I have reported on this letter several times here on this blog – but Joan refuses to address this issue! Just like in her book- she mentions only 2 events in 1995. Her starting college, and her divorce. Oh, but she doesn’t mention that in the spring of 1995, I pulled her into court for harassment – and I provide that letter to my husband as proof – because she’s pleading with him to leave me, asking him to have me drop the charges – and asking my mother in law to turn against me. – oh no! Joan doesn’t interfere in MY life whatsoever and never did! But I provide PROOF POSITIVE that she did and does. But Joan will not answer to this. – WHY?
In the letter she wrote on January 6, 1995 to the director of financial services of my employer, she accuses me of tampering with her medical bill. She writes a 3 page letter, when only one paragraph would suffice. But in this letter, she gives this man, a stranger to me, personal details of MY life, violating my privacy. But at the bottom of the last page of this letter, she is demanding HER privacy! Why the double standard Joan? YOU get to have privacy, but I don’t? ANSWER THIS QUESTION JOAN, AND ANSWER IT RIGHT NOW!!!
Oh, but Joan doesn’t hurt her sisters, never has. As for her assertions that her book is about her and her alone, and her adoption, then what the hell is MY miscarriage mentioned in it? Along with the falsehood that I went to a fertility clinic. And this falsehood was actually in a sentence that contradicted this!
On page 302, she says this about me: “At one point in her life, she claimed to want children and even went through infertility tests with her pervious boyfriend.” Well if I had only CLAIMED to want children, I wouldn’t have gone through infertility tests, now would I? And right here, Joan makes a mockery of my miscarriage of June 5, 1985, where SHE was in the waiting room with my friend Francine, and even drove me home several days later. The next sentence in her rotten book is really very sweet: “Just as well that she didn’t get pregnant because she said she didn’t know how anyone could do it.”
How dare you Joan? You take a figure of speech and throw it in my face, and throw away MY SON by saying it was a good thing I didn’t get pregnant? I DID GET PREGNANT AND LOST MY CHILD! What the hell is the matter with you? Oh, but you didn’t write that book about your sisters, did you? That book was about YOUR life, YOUR adoption, YOUR adoption reunion and YOUR adoption reform work! THEN WHAT THE HELL IS THIS SHIT ABOUT ME NOT GETTING PREGNANT AND YOUR MOCKERY OF THE LOSS OF MY SON ABOUT? My son, who I named in my heart Saied Ali, is my heart. HOW DARE YOU MOCK ME LOSING HIM? AND WHAT DOES MY LOSING HIM HAVE TO DO WITH YOUR BOOK?
ANSWER THIS QUESTION JOAN! Oh, but Joan NEVER writes things to hurt her sisters, now does she? Oh no! She doesn’t think that even after 25 years, that I would be mourning my son? Here, how about if HER son gets smacked by a car next week? Would Joan care? I doubt it.
I could go on, and I will – that’s the whole purpose of this blog – to show the world that Joan Mary Wheeler is a liar, a filthy liar at that! She tells the world that she NEVER wrote anything to hurt her sisters, when I just wrote and said she did. I have provided explicit documentation to prove that she is a liar. But Joan will NOT answer these allegations. She keeps saying that we call her a liar. Yes, we do. Well, Joan, PROVE TO US THAT YOU ARE NOT A LIAR! COME ON, JOAN, SPEAK!
1. Gert – November 24, 2010
I agree with everything that Ruth has said here, in addition, if you noticed in the documents that Ruth posted, as our evidence that Joan lies, that Joan will take any and every opportunity to tell anyone about our lives. She does not care about anyone’s privacy.
Ruth said: “In the letter she wrote on January 6, 1995 to the director of financial services of my employer, she accuses me of tampering with her medical bill. She writes a 3 page letter, when only one paragraph would suffice. But in this letter, she gives this man, a stranger to me, personal details of MY life, violating my privacy.”
In that same letter, Joan tells these strangers things about our(us sisters’)personal lives and our family business…what for? Because Joan has no brains!
Ruth continues: “But at the bottom of the last page of this letter, she is demanding HER privacy! Why the double standard Joan? YOU get to have privacy, but I don’t?”
I agree, what gives here Joan? You want privacy but no one else should have privacy!
come out come out where ever you are Joan and answer the charges against you.